I think I'll be gone by late April, May by the latest as that's when my university exams are. Been suicidal and tried to take my life before but I've always ended up stopping myself and giving myself a reason to carry on. Except this time I can't find a reason, and I'm making peace with the fact that I'm ready to go.
TheGoodGuy
Visionary
- Aug 27, 2018
- 2,999
Ending it this month, I also will turn 25 on April 18th and since 2020 is a new decade I am kinda annoyed that I don´t have money for just the rest of this year.
pressuredpigeon
New Member
- Jan 14, 2019
- 2
Right there with you, just wish it were easier
TheFinalCountdown
Student
- Mar 25, 2019
- 136
TAW122
Emissary of the right to die.
- Aug 30, 2018
- 6,798
I don't wish to see another year either (and was originally planning to end it late May 2019), but as the previous month has been a significant improvement for me, I've chosen to stay a while longer. No longer actively going through suicide nor anytime soon, but it is still a thing in my mind since I know things can change for the worst very quickly and suddenly too. I don't plan to live to old age either, so if there is something that pushes me over the edge or when I see a steady, constant decline with no reasonable chance of improvement (getting to late mid-age and body failing me slowly), then I'll ctb before I lose the capacity to do so (mentally and physically).
not-2-b-the-answer
Archangel
- Mar 23, 2018
- 9,174
Ideally ill go because life has gotten unbearable but I have been saying that for years and im still here just existing miserably.
dandan
One more attempt on life.
- Feb 18, 2019
- 1,298
Has the last couple years been worth it?? Anything good in them?I don't either but I've been saying I don't want to see another year for years.
Or do we want to live just because of living ..??
not-2-b-the-answer
Archangel
- Mar 23, 2018
- 9,174
The last couple years have been HELL !!!
It just gets worse ... I don't want to hurt family and friends but I hate it here more than I ever have.
I don't feel like I'm living anymore … just existing to not hurt others.
Work is a FUCKING NIGHTMARE !!!
I can't get a good job... too FUCKING STUPID !!! Just SHIT jobs that drain what little soul I have left.
GeorgeJL
Enlightened
- Mar 7, 2019
- 1,621
Quinlor
The stranger
- Feb 21, 2019
- 1,058
Do you want to talk about it?I plan to do it today.
Empty Smile
The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1,785
I didn't want to live to see 2019. Why would I want to live long enough to see 2020?
Memento Mori
shambling garbage
- Jan 24, 2019
- 573
maybe beginn of autumn, maybe new years eve, maybe next march? with my lifestyle it may happen accidentally. if not on these dates then i'll either never do it or i need some more years for this shit. we'll see
dandan
One more attempt on life.
- Feb 18, 2019
- 1,298
Have you planned it? Are taking enemetics?I plan to do it today.
I have a "good" job, but I'll never be rich or own a house, or what really matters, I dunno if I'll ever be happy and content. And that sucks big timeThe last couple years have been HELL !!!
It just gets worse ... I don't want to hurt family and friends but I hate it here more than I ever have.
I don't feel like I'm living anymore … just existing to not hurt others.
Work is a FUCKING NIGHTMARE !!!
Just SHIT jobs that drain what little soul I have left.
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not-2-b-the-answer
Archangel
- Mar 23, 2018
- 9,174
God ... I hope I'm not here that long.
I plan to do it today.
Hope you found peace.
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Querry1
life is unfair, ctb or get away
- Aug 16, 2018
- 180
I'm going to Wardruna concert, some trips around the world with my friends (really cheap prices, couldn't resist), I'm soo happy for all of them, I've got everything planned and now I've got antiemetics and anti acids so it's going to be well
I plan to to try and CBT tomorrow. I have tried a few times before and failed but I am slightly more confident this time. I plan on doing the night night method along with partial. I don't have a ratchet so i'm hoping gravity will keep everything in place although there is a chance that what i'm using to block the carotid will move but i cant do much about that. I'm not sure if i will succeed tomorrow I have been struggling to find the sweet spot of late but I will try none the less
JadedGray
Life Eternal
- Jul 24, 2018
- 991
I'm hoping before summer starts. Most people have SAD in the winter, but for me it's the summer... summertime sadness.
I want to ctb
I've had the same issue ha tried several times but just get an intense feeling that my head is going explode. Can't seem to get it in the right place so going to go for the exit bag
dandan
One more attempt on life.
- Feb 18, 2019
- 1,298
Wednesdays&Cyanide
Member
- Oct 25, 2018
- 8
I'm in the same boat, I want to ctb by the end of the month before my birthday or at least before mid May when my uni exams start. Previous times I've attempted, something always stopped me - besides the survival instinct, I always gave myself a reason to have to carry on. Often that reason would be a person, that I needed to carry on so that I wouldn't hurt them by ending my life. But now, even though there are people I care about and don't want to hurt, I can't find a reason to stay.
Kikoo Loool
Enlightened
- Feb 25, 2019
- 1,128
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