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What's keeping me around
Thread starterctbsd24
Start date
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I feel like I could have/should have ctb'd years ago but I'm being pulled in three directions in my mind: (1) the desire to ctb; (2) the guilt over leaving behind friends/family/pets who would never understand my decision; and (3) a weirder guilt over abandoning responsibilities in my professional life. I'm totally nuts lol.
Reactions:
wren-briar, Zanmato and Tired_of_myself
the #2 really gets me, i feel like this can traumatize my family and wife…
My #3 would be fear of doing something wrong and survive… one time i took too many pills and went parcially blind and deaf for weeks of the intoxication and it was really scared… the plan has to be perfect and this scares me
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