leloyon

leloyon

I'll see you in the Wired.
Feb 4, 2023
1,093
Considering it's 05:00, probably sleeping with a partner.
Instead I am browsing a suicide forum in the dark, alone without anyone to even call a friend.
 
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dogbreath

dogbreath

Youre not even in the hole, are you?
Feb 13, 2023
118
making art instead of laying in bed for the entire day. I always dreamed of making my career art related but the issue is that I have no motivation or energy at all. My brain is active with all kinds of ideas but its trapped in a body that just wants to die.
 
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HAKMKS

Praying things get better
May 29, 2023
147
It is pure speculation.

Maybe chatting with my potential girlfriend. Actually I am texting with a woman but she lacks sanity we are just acquaintances. And I probably have a lot of flaws too.

I had the idea for this threads when I watched the news. When I was younger I wanted to become politician. It is so sad to see. I wish I could spend my resources on some dream goals. But instead I need extreme discipline to attend half-time college. It is a damn joke which feels pretty pathetic. On the other hand I never was smart enough for that. So I probably would have ended in a mediocre position working my ass off. So instead I can act as philosopher king in a suicde forum. Despite the fact many people here have way more knowledge on philosophy than me.

Maybe I would play video games before going to sleep. I did that when I was younger. I quit that behavior because it is too exciting. And I get depressed before I go to sleep and rather want to use that time for self-reflection and becoming calm.
Happily married, nice home, no financial worries, loving spouse, children, annual vacations, fulfilling career,...