- I need & want a higher source of income to support myself but my depression saps all my energy, can barely finish each workday because it is very draining as well.
- Could start a business, but I have extremely little to no money for marketing, consultants/employees, etc. I'd be robbing Peter to pay Paul with interest most likely.
- Relationship sucks, boring and no joy at all and of course he does absolutely nothing without me asking/nagging/etc so most if not everything as far as chores/errands/keeping track of things needed/to be done/etc, must be done by me. We don't have sex at all.
- Because of him, I no longer have 2 cars and now no replacement. I've been put into the high priced car environment just after Covid came to the US and cannot afford to buy another even after insurance paid up. AND my last car was in excellent condition prior to that accident and almost paid off! I was better off without him but if I leave now, we both would be homeless, just separately. I would not even have a car to sleep in. We are just roomates
- I get treated very rudely by customers at work, who call us for help. I still cannot wrap my head around this, verbal abuse of complete strangers is apparently common and employers do not care. Lot's of people come and go over the course of each year but my skills and experience aren't really unique and I don't have any connections so this is where I go stale I guess.
- I have no money to do anything that I need or want, every month feels like robbing Peter to pay Paul. Often, my needs go unmet and there's no money to "better" myself by finishing college (too expensive and work takes every bit of energy so I quit) or learning a trade.
- The hobbies & things I'm good at have fallen by the way as the full time job and my depression combine to take me literally from work, to bed. I have no energy and everything is at the point of asking what is the point of getting out of bed, what is the point in taking a walk, what is the point in trying to be social, etc.?
- I have picked up and moved 2 times in the past couple of years trying to escape bad neighbors but every apartment just has new effer's who exist to deprive you of sleep or some reasonable level of quiet. It's too expensive to rent a single family home (no money to buy of course) or even if it could be in our price range, it's not available when we were actually moving. Last night I literally kicked a hole in a wall because I could not contain my anger for being prevented from going to sleep until roughly midnight and THEN being awakened by their noise less than 2 hours later! I remained away until after 7 am. Yet the management company refuses to enforce their own lease. Can't afford to break the lease, can't afford to get a lawyer, wouldn't be kind to beat the snot out of them or do worse.
I know I am not the only person living a life of complete despair. But I am not completely unaware that the effers who tell you to call a hotline or "get help" don't understand there is no effing help for this. I don't see a way out short of some absolute miracle happening and miracles don't happen for me or the millions in not so dissimilar situations in life. I want out. Honestly, do you see any of this getting better? Any suggestions because my 3 attempts with various pills did not work.
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