Venting What should there be to look forward to?

[TheSoulless]

There's nothing that motivates me to live in the long run. There's nothing that would make me excited for tomorrow, either. I lay in bed for a few hours because I know I'll have to start another meaningless day again. Fuck this.

 

[june]

Maybe we're similar but I have tough days and tougher days. On the especially rough days, I cut out every responsibility possible besides the essential. So I'll stay in bed in my free time, order take out, vent, be in pajamas and nap. I haven't found a better way

 

[Superdeterminist]

There's nothing that motivates me to live in the long run. There's nothing that would make me excited for tomorrow, either. I lay in bed for a few hours because I know I'll have to start another meaningless day again. Fuck this.

Personally, I'm motivated by the desire for a girlfriend, for nice things, and for new experiences. But never has my motivation seemed to be strong enough to drive me to actually work for these things. And I've heard from some people, that pursuit of these things will not provide lasting happiness, which makes me question: why pursue it at all? Still, I yearn for them, but I don't know how to achieve them, nor can I seem to gather the courage, or the willpower to get to work on it. If I stay in bed, I begin to panic and grow restless, so unlike you I feel I cannot do that. Yet, all I do anyway is get up and wander around the house all day, panicking anyway. A peaceful way out is all I want.

 

[SunInTheShade9]

There's nothing that motivates me to live in the long run. There's nothing that would make me excited for tomorrow, either. I lay in bed for a few hours because I know I'll have to start another meaningless day again. Fuck this.

I feel you OP. I wish I had the answer for you, myself, and everyone else who could benefit from that answer. I'm on your same level at the moment. Virtual hugs xx

Personally, I'm motivated by the desire for a girlfriend, for nice things, and for new experiences. But never has my motivation seemed to be strong enough to drive me to actually work for these things. And I've heard from some people, that pursuit of these things will not provide lasting happiness, which makes me question: why pursue it at all? Still, I yearn for them, but I don't know how to achieve them, nor can I seem to gather the courage, or the willpower to get to work on it. If I stay in bed, I begin to panic and grow restless, so unlike you I feel I cannot do that. Yet, all I do anyway is get up and wander around the house all day, panicking anyway. A peaceful way out is all I want.

I feel you. Xx

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Same, I have no dreams left my poor health has shattered any dreams I ever had I have no hobbies or passions for anything just apathy, nothing is new and exciting to me anymore everything is the same e.g. movies, series, video games everything else in life as I have said before my existence feels like an open world video game that I have completed 100% for example GTA 5, after it´s finished 100% what else is there to do? in terms of the game you can drive around or engage in shootouts but eventually it´s get boring and trivial and you exit the game.

The same goes for "life" every day is the same I have lived a full life an amazing childhood and exciting teenage years so despite my scattered dreams I have actually lived but now I am just stuck in this game that is life every day is so boring and triviel and I know when I wake up as soon as I step out of bed another triviel day has started with the same routine; get up make the same breakfast (a smoothie) take my meds, brush my teeth and tongue (because of food allergies) then I just watch series for the rest of the day and engage in a couple forums and of course there might be some errands to ran like grocery shopping, cook and eat food it´s all so extremely boring it´s not life it´s just existing.

I wish I could dream for the rest of my life or just ctb at least in my dreams I live even though I don´t have vivid dreams every night but I did last night and it reminds of the scene from South Park where Cartman dreams about the Sea People and he says while still sleeping "yes I´m a somebody I´m a somebody" then he wakes up "ahh I´m a nobody" I get that feeling I just lived a thrilling life in my dreams in a normal functioning body and then I wake up to this nightmare..

 

[RileyTanaka]

I don't find life boring or devoid of meaning. But it's hard to maintain the sense that life is worth it when so much of your daily life is rife with struggle, suffering, or doing the bare minimum when that's all your health with allow. I keep my days full of plans for the future, and very slowly complete tasks to get towards various, arbitrary goals I set... but I know in the back of my mind there is a very good probability they will not work out based on history. I guess I'm choosing not to get too attached, but I know this is my last thrust towards subsisting. I'm just one more wrong turn away from getting on the bus.

 

[faust]

It is hard to say from my own angle. I know bad things coming are inevitable for me, but it is getting worse before the sharp fall and it did not have to be like that. I want to find a job so that I could afford some things before I go and when I go. But employers pretend I do not exist so I am just living my final days without any perspectives to feel better before I go. I am looking forward to CTB, but I doubt about all other things which I planned, so that is the only thing I am looking forward to. Nothing is clear right now, I do not know what I can expect from tomorrow.