Discussion What is valid depression?

[cowbain]

I often wonder this. *To clarify, everyone's emotions and feelings are valid as long as they aren't harmful*, but what makes someone mentally ill?

Out of respect for others with clinical depression and myself, I only refer to depression as the mental illness and not sadness because there's a big distinction imo, and I'm not trying to spread any more misinformation and stigmas about an already highly misrepresented illness. I see so many people with fairly decent lives. People who may take for granted all of the areas they have control over. School, work, basic functioning, relationships, having a support system even if it's tiny, or the simplest things such as their memory or health. Yet they're still depressed and may even contemplate suicide. Then there's people like me who have no one and absolutely nothing to live for, with a very small chance that things will get better. Who knows... maybe I'm not even mentally ill, maybe this is situational because I think anyone in my position would feel this way. But I can't even process having no reason to feel bad yet still feeling that way. Is that what true mental illness is, you know like, when they talk about chemical imbalances and shit? I hope this doesn't come off as offensive or me trying to be pretentious like "boohoo im the only one with a shit life!1!1!". My brains basically mush now (took me an hour to verbalize my thoughts into words ahaha, sad ik )and I'm genuinely curious about trying to figure this out and what others think so yeah guys, let me know what your thoughts are.

 

[trynacbt]

I think both of the things you are describing are depression. Depression can be high functioning and low functioning, it can be clear to the eye or absolutely hidden. My mother for instance had everything in life and she ctb'd three months ago. I on the other hand feel utterly incapable to do anything, though I lived a perfectly normal life until my young adult years. It's not clear cut, I think.

 

[MeltingHeart]

What do you mean by valid depression? There are so many types of depression - clinical types alone have many variations , then there are just the "life situation" types of depression - which I would often say could be called "hopelessness" that sense of "giving up on life " as it for whatever reason it just feels too hard, the difficult times out way the good times, it just doesn't feel worth it, you can't experince joy & so forth...or that feeling of losing all pleasure in once enjoyable activities (which I have ) which is horrible. Do you mean how do they diagnose depression? As opposed just been profoundly 'fed up' with life ?

 

[cowbain]

I think both of the things you are describing are depression. Depression can be high functioning and low functioning, it can be clear to the eye or absolutely hidden. My mother for instance had everything in life and she ctb'd three months ago. I on the other hand feel utterly incapable to do anything, though I lived a perfectly normal life until my young adult years. It's not clear cut, I think.

Damn, I never know how to comfort people who've lost loved ones because Ive never had any but my thoughts are with you. You're right about high functioning and low functioning depression. Ive had depression since I was 12 but it didn't become low functioning until I was 14. It's frustrating because so far the therapists I've seen have just treated it like it's a me problem and haven't really helped with doing treatments so I can get back to being high functioning, they just tell me to do things as if it's that simple. Then again my situation is complexed and a lot of my mental health issues are due to an abusive environment. Still, it's so discouraging to want recovery but for professionals to not know what to do to help :/ What are your thoughts on situational depression and do you think people should be given medication for it or is that potentially dangerous?

What do you mean by valid depression? There are so many types of depression - clinical types alone have many variations , then there are just the "life situation" types of depression - which I would often say could be called "hopelessness" that sense of "giving up on life " as it for whatever reason it just feels too hard, the difficult times out way the good times, it just doesn't feel worth it, you can't experince joy & so forth...or that feeling of losing all pleasure in once enjoyable activities (which I have ) which is horrible. Do you mean how do they diagnose depression? As opposed just been profoundly 'fed up' with life ?

I mean the mental illness. I briefly saw a psychotherapist who said he doesn't believe that depression exists (that it's not a mental illness) and honestly I'm starting to believe him to an extent. Like there's obviously a big difference between being sad and having clinical depression and so many people just throw around depression to describe any slight inconvenience or negative thought that it's kind of confusing now. Being sad and having depression are both valid but the treatments for them aren't the same.

 

[MeltingHeart]

Damn, I never know how to comfort people who've lost loved ones because Ive never had any but my thoughts are with you. You're right about high functioning and low functioning depression. Ive had depression since I was 12 but it didn't become low functioning until I was 14. It's frustrating because so far the therapists I've seen have just treated it like it's a me problem and haven't really helped with doing treatments so I can get back to being high functioning, they just tell me to do things as if it's that simple. Then again my situation is complexed and a lot of my mental health issues are due to an abusive environment. Still, it's so discouraging to want recovery but for professionals to not know what to do to help :/ What are your thoughts on situational depression and do you think people should be given medication for it or is that potentially dangerous?

I mean the mental illness. I briefly saw a psychotherapist who said he doesn't believe that depression exists (that it's not a mental illness) and honestly I'm starting to believe him to an extent. Like there's obviously a big difference between being sad and having clinical depression and so many people just throw around depression to describe any slight inconvenience or negative thought that it's kind of confusing now. Being sad and having depression are both valid but the treatments for them aren't the same.

Yeah I understand what you mean- alot of people throw the word around-and use it too lightly, its normal to be sad or stressed when shit things happen-but that is not depression-I dont know how old you are but yr an adult and youve felt this way since u were 12! that IS depression! I think you need to find a new psychotherapist- he sounds very cold and narrow minded, i do not believe pills are the answer to everything, but sometimes a low dose, short term anti-d,can help- it can alleviate the symptoms enough to allow you to begin to explore long term treatments/ address life factors etc. someone once wrote that it being on them just gave that much needed respite from their negative thoughts-it was in a sense a mini break for the mind-some r & r. As i dont know about u but feeling depressed for so long is quite simple exhausting. medication can help renew that sense of energy (of the mind) and give the 'space' to think. Have u never been on anti-d's even though u have felt like this for so long? Ive been on quite a few, if u ever wanna pm chat about my experience of them, or just here-doesnt need to be in 'PM'.

 

[WhiteDespair]

The emptiness and numbness is terrible. I'd overdose on Wellbutrin just so I could withdrawal and feel something. As the song says, "I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all." That's hard to understand for most people.

 

[cowbain]

Yeah I understand what you mean- alot of people throw the word around-and use it too lightly, its normal to be sad or stressed when shit things happen-but that is not depression-I dont know how old you are but yr an adult and youve felt this way since u were 12! that IS depression! I think you need to find a new psychotherapist- he sounds very cold and narrow minded, i do not believe pills are the answer to everything, but sometimes a low dose, short term anti-d,can help- it can alleviate the symptoms enough to allow you to begin to explore long term treatments/ address life factors etc. someone once wrote that it being on them just gave that much needed respite from their negative thoughts-it was in a sense a mini break for the mind-some r & r. As i dont know about u but feeling depressed for so long is quite simple exhausting. medication can help renew that sense of energy (of the mind) and give the 'space' to think. Have u never been on anti-d's even though u have felt like this for so long? Ive been on quite a few, if u ever wanna pm chat about my experience of them, or just here-doesnt need to be in 'PM'.

I'm not that old, I'm barely an adult lol. I'd say for me my high functioning depression sucked but wow low functioning mental illness is way worse, I didn't think it was possible to get this bad. That psychotherapist was actually one of the kindest I've run into, he usually charges $180 per session but let me see him two times for free and even comforted me over a phone call when I wasn't even really his patient. I think what he meant by the depression statement was more so philosophical. For me it's situational, for others who have a good life maybe they just haven't found their purpose, or need a change in perspective, or even they just might be longing for deeper connections,etc. And with how easy it is for people to just throw around depression when in reality they could just have a low self esteem or be sad or something else, I'm just starting to doubt if depression is an illness. Funnily enough I only doubt it when I talk to others. There's only been very few instances where I've talked to other "depressed" people and felt like they actually had the mental illness. Idk if this makes sense but yeah. I guess what I'm trying to say is since depression (also anxiety disorders) is one of the few mental illnesses with symptoms that are accessible and "relatable" that people will latch onto it and say they have it without 0 knowledge of what it's actually like. And yeah I have been on antidepressants, sadly they don't work.

The emptiness and numbness is terrible. I'd overdose on Wellbutrin just so I could withdrawal and feel something. As the song says, "I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all." That's hard to understand for most people.

Do you have anhedonia? If so, I feel you.. it sucks. If you want tips to make it potentially get better or just want someone to talk to pm me, I'm here for you :)

 

[MeltingHeart]

I'm not that old, I'm barely an adult lol. I'd say for me my high functioning depression sucked but wow low functioning mental illness is way worse, I didn't think it was possible to get this bad. That psychotherapist was actually one of the kindest I've run into, he usually charges $180 per session but let me see him two times for free and even comforted me over a phone call when I wasn't even really his patient. I think what he meant by the depression statement was more so philosophical. For me it's situational, for others who have a good life maybe they just haven't found their purpose, or need a change in perspective, or even they just might be longing for deeper connections,etc. And with how easy it is for people to just throw around depression when in reality they could just have a low self esteem or be sad or something else, I'm just starting to doubt if depression is an illness. Funnily enough I only doubt it when I talk to others. There's only been very few instances where I've talked to other "depressed" people and felt like they actually had the mental illness. Idk if this makes sense but yeah. I guess what I'm trying to say is since depression (also anxiety disorders) is one of the few mental illnesses with symptoms that are accessible and "relatable" that people will latch onto it and say they have it without 0 knowledge of what it's actually like. And yeah I have been on antidepressants, sadly they don't work.

Do you have anhedonia? If so, I feel you.. it sucks. If you want tips to make it potentially get better or just want someone to talk to pm me, I'm here for you :)

Well you seem smart, perceptive, insightful and wise, and yr still young- so you got all that in yr favour atleast. Did u try just one anti-d or different ones? sometimes u have to find the right one that works for u (god i sound like i work for a pharma company!) ... good that yr doing therapy anyway... dont know what yr 'thing' is, but exercise & stuff..? perhaps that is stating the glaringly obvious! I used to do alot of yoga...which literally saved me at the time..and I am not some hippy dippy type...well...maybe a little bit ;)

 

[Neurodamaged2]

Depression is an umbrella condition that's being used by lazy / incompetent psychs to deal with a lot of their patients who actually aren't depressed but in fact are dealing with something else. Depression checklists are so vague that most things fall under it. Throw in that anti-depressants, especially long term use, can cause depression / other issues, and you've got a recipe for long term disaster.

 

[MeltingHeart]

Depression is an umbrella condition that's being used by lazy / incompetent psychs to deal with a lot of their patients who actually aren't depressed but in fact are dealing with something else. Depression checklists are so vague that most things fall under it. Throw in that anti-depressants, especially long term use, can cause depression / other issues, and you've got a recipe for long term disaster.

I do see yr point but at the end of the day docs / psych have only got so much to go on ... they are not infallible too... what are they meant to do with someone that approaches them with chronic, long term "sadness/ despair/ hopelessness"?
For want of a better words ...sadly they actually can't change someones own personal history - anti-ds can help I believe- but I would agree with you-better for short term use- then what can they do- suggest therapy ? Yet I have seen so so many people on here critisise the therapy they receive too! What's the alternative? What do you see is lacking in these services ? (Not being confrontational - just interested to see what people think would be more beneficial or a good altenative to the docs/psych's assessments)

 

[WhiteDespair]

I'm not that old, I'm barely an adult lol. I'd say for me my high functioning depression sucked but wow low functioning mental illness is way worse, I didn't think it was possible to get this bad. That psychotherapist was actually one of the kindest I've run into, he usually charges $180 per session but let me see him two times for free and even comforted me over a phone call when I wasn't even really his patient. I think what he meant by the depression statement was more so philosophical. For me it's situational, for others who have a good life maybe they just haven't found their purpose, or need a change in perspective, or even they just might be longing for deeper connections,etc. And with how easy it is for people to just throw around depression when in reality they could just have a low self esteem or be sad or something else, I'm just starting to doubt if depression is an illness. Funnily enough I only doubt it when I talk to others. There's only been very few instances where I've talked to other "depressed" people and felt like they actually had the mental illness. Idk if this makes sense but yeah. I guess what I'm trying to say is since depression (also anxiety disorders) is one of the few mental illnesses with symptoms that are accessible and "relatable" that people will latch onto it and say they have it without 0 knowledge of what it's actually like. And yeah I have been on antidepressants, sadly they don't work.

Do you have anhedonia? If so, I feel you.. it sucks. If you want tips to make it potentially get better or just want someone to talk to pm me, I'm here for you :)

Tried to pm. Didn't work.

 

[Amz_Falls]

I HATE it when people say 'Oh I'm so depressed'. They have no fucking idea how horrible depression is.

 

[WhiteDespair]

I'm not that old, I'm barely an adult lol. I'd say for me my high functioning depression sucked but wow low functioning mental illness is way worse, I didn't think it was possible to get this bad. That psychotherapist was actually one of the kindest I've run into, he usually charges $180 per session but let me see him two times for free and even comforted me over a phone call when I wasn't even really his patient. I think what he meant by the depression statement was more so philosophical. For me it's situational, for others who have a good life maybe they just haven't found their purpose, or need a change in perspective, or even they just might be longing for deeper connections,etc. And with how easy it is for people to just throw around depression when in reality they could just have a low self esteem or be sad or something else, I'm just starting to doubt if depression is an illness. Funnily enough I only doubt it when I talk to others. There's only been very few instances where I've talked to other "depressed" people and felt like they actually had the mental illness. Idk if this makes sense but yeah. I guess what I'm trying to say is since depression (also anxiety disorders) is one of the few mental illnesses with symptoms that are accessible and "relatable" that people will latch onto it and say they have it without 0 knowledge of what it's actually like. And yeah I have been on antidepressants, sadly they don't work.

Do you have anhedonia? If so, I feel you.. it sucks. If you want tips to make it potentially get better or just want someone to talk to pm me, I'm here for you :)

I missed your earlier pm and it didn't remain in my list. I am likely doing something wrong. It is my mistake.

Is there another style of pm or is it just the mail icon?