What is keeping me here?

[throwaway123]

I don't get it. My life is hell. I don't want to continue this any longer. There's nothing to live for and I honestly don't see whats so special about life anyway. But I am still here. I am for some reason unable to end it. I've been trying to figure out what it is but I just don't get it. There's literally nothing keeping me here any longer. I want to end it this week,I've said it before and I know I will probably fail again. What a loser I am. I can't even kill myself. I'm pathetic and that's exactly how people see me. I see these people everyday with their perfect lives and it just makes me sick. "I can't take it any longer" I've been saying this for the past few years and I'm still here. What am I doing wrong? Am I a coward?

 

[LoverofDeath]

Are you maybe afraid of the pain that will be caused by your chosen suicide method?

 

[throwaway123]

Are you maybe afraid of the pain that will be caused by your chosen suicide method?

Yes, that and failure(being caught and forced into a mental hospital).

 

[CloseToAlive]

Same here, always thinking about suicide event trying to do it, but when I make my mind something disturb me. and it been years since the first time. It make me think that i'm curse to be immortal.

 

[Tiburcio]

Survival instinct is torture. It's the bars of our jail.