I know some people who have to go through the same things as we do, they go through depression and pain daily, they have failed sui attempts and know how pointless life is. Yet they choose continue living and tell me to live to see another day. I don't get it, it's like they're torturing themselves.
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SinisterKid
Visionary
- Jun 1, 2019
- 2,113
You use the word yourself, its down to CHOICE. Why they make that choice we may never know, but it is theirs to make and whilst we may not understand it, we should not judge them for making that choice.
Empty Smile
The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1,785
Some just hold onto the hope that things will get better. I have tried it in the past, but the more days go by, the more things stay the same.
h0wd1rtygurlsST4Yc1n
Member
- Jul 26, 2019
- 54
i think they are brave. lol i mean damn it could always be way worse.....i don't get sober people either tho.To me theyre just doing it out of instinct. If you ask them what is it theyre living for. Most of them cannot give you a concrete answer. Because they dont know. That kind of life is no different from other creatures we see around us.Last edited:hearing them talking about the shit they have to go through everyday make me feel very bad for themit's just that you dont care anymore, after a while you just give up and nothing is important anymore, not even the need to die.
I've been one of those for 25 years, tried almost everything until 2 years ago, then I just gave up, too tired and dead inside to even care to think about death anymore, and I dont need to as death has become a part of me already
Everything is ready, I have what I need to end this, it can be tomorrow or in a year, not important.
Sanguinius
Chicken of ss
- Aug 9, 2018
- 291
i cant understand them, and id like to tell them that they are free. id like to tell them that they have choice. if they want to life, im glad. but if they dont want it, theyre free. and the decicision is only, and only theirs.
btw, why are you that sure they suffer?
i had some intrest about bdsm and read some stuff about it, and ive learnd one thing: we are all different. there are people, who like the pain. its just like, if you see somone getting.... idk, maybe spanked, it may be that that person is the happiest in the world, and it may be that that person is purely suffering. everyone is different.
maybe they didn't suffer from something as much as you did. maybe they find enough beauty to make all the sadness in life worth it, even if you do not.
deltahead
Student
- May 28, 2019
- 160
this dilemma in itself almost feels enough to make me kill myself. it feels like their existence completely negates and invalidates mine. i truly don't understand. every person that chooses life has had a considerably harder life than i probably ever will. abuse and pain on a level i can't even imagine. it almost feels like a waste. a narrative like that in my life would make it so much easier to die, knowing everyone in my life's hurt me like that. it's a much needed backstory. so, why? i'm honestly jealous. why continue to live, perpetuating the same mistakes and oversights and instinct-based split second decisions that allowed you to be abused in the first place? why willingly repeat the abuser's steps, only in a way that is personally agreeable to you? why treat me as if not having hope is a foolish thing to do? you have every justification you could possibly need for defeating a destructive survival instinct that's developed for millions of years and you just...choose not to? not to mention the comparably privileged positions they live in would allow for a much easier suicide.
i can't answer any of this. i guess the fact i'm asking crazy shit like this in the first place is why i'm currently on this site while they're off somewhere else being happy and healthy adults. i don't know what i am, compared to them. i don't know if i'm someone dumber or inferior, less human. i don't know what i'm going to become if i keep zombie walking through this empty mockery of a life. i would be so glad if i never had to think about these people again.
sunny.sativa
organic
- Apr 2, 2019
- 317
I mean, hey. The subject of your question has entered the chat.
Cause whyyy the FUCK not? There's also enjoyable shit.
Sushi.
Ukulele.
The beach.
Winning solitaire. .. every.. single time because that's all I fuckin do
I'm gonna die anyways. It's not like I have to live forever and when you've failed suicide after a given number of times, maybe you figure,"well, shit. why not just.. have a taco and listen to Glass Animals since I'm bad at dying."
HGL91
Warlock
- Jul 2, 2019
- 720
Maybe because they don't know how to commit suicide successfully, so they have to lie to themselves that there is good in life to keep them going rather than giving up, and life becoming worse due to neglecting responsibilities. That's what I do...I mean, if I have to continue living, I rather it be with money, a roof over my head, and the best health I can muster.
not_a_robot
"i hope the leaving is joyful, & never to return"
- May 30, 2019
- 2,121
The abuse I've suffered has exponentially increased my need to die, true.
But my need to outlive those bastards is just *slightly* stronger than my need to die.
For now, at least.
Ask me again tomorrow.
TheGoodGuy
Illuminated
- Aug 27, 2018
- 3,069
It´s insanity why go on if you suffer from mental and/or physical problems that have robbed you of joy and happiness then you just exist and there is a huge difference between living and existing.More of them would probably choose to bail out if they had access to assisted planned death to avoid making their situation potentially worse.
DepressionsAHo
Heaven gained a new ho
- Feb 15, 2019
- 831
The answer is a simple one. Pro choice. They may be miserable in their life but all I can do is try to offer them some sort of solstice. Ultimately, the Choice Is up to them. That is after all what pro choice means.I think they are tough as nails and I wish I had half their strength, tbh. I have had an easy life and still can't hack it. The calls are coming from inside the house.
SinisterKid
Visionary
- Jun 1, 2019
- 2,113
I think the word you are looking for is Solace, not Solstice, which is a astrological/solar event
DepressionsAHo
Heaven gained a new ho
- Feb 15, 2019
- 831
Shit lmao. My badI think the word you are looking for is Solace, not Solstice, which is a astrological/solar event
I was tired when typing thisSimple for me. Because I'm terified that a failed attempt will leave me worse off. I don't continue out of courage but out of fear.
Misanthrope
Mage
- Oct 23, 2018
- 557
Only we know our own situation and what our thresholds for pain are. How people view suffering is unique to them. Some offset their suffering with things they value amidst it. I think if euthanasia was available as a response to suffering; not just terminal illness. More would choose not to endure. Because it allows for certainty. Fear keeps many here despite their pain. Fear of ending up in worse pain because of a botched attempt. That and suicide has unique qualities to it that are different from a sudden heart attack for instance. But if you could properly say goodbye in an environment that allows for it there would likely be many more takers. Death is also a great mystery, or is given supernatural qualities that prod at fear or shame you for your choices. Like you failed in some grand lesson plan. Better the devil you know guides many. If you are in limbo, life is the default state. Many shut down while they suffer and end up on autopilot or invested in distraction. Days become months, then years and on it goes. Creatures of habit till the threshold we all have is crossed or distraction fails. There is probably a religious dimension for some as well. Most also assume your suffering is fixable because they are not you. Or project their own stance of enduring and hold you to the same standard like we are all the same.
Yeah shutdown and in distraction mode that's me. Denial and delusion.
LastFlowers
the haru that can read
- Apr 27, 2019
- 2,170
I don't think anything of them really, other than that they should not push their own path onto me. Just because they continue on, does not mean I have to. And I also don't appreciate OTHER people using them as an example as to why I should do the same.
I guess I wonder too, why people with my issue or other issues continue going even when they know it is permanent, I don't understand them unless there is reason for them to believe things will turn around.
OnlyMercy
No More
- Oct 23, 2018
- 190
Those who choose to continue to live under deplorable conditions do so because of false inherent belief that life is intrinsically valuable. They do not realise or refuse to acknowledge the fact that a life lived in perpetual pain and suffering is one not worth living. We who make the decision to end our pain by our own hand arguably possess greater initiative and agency over the fate our existence or lack thereof.
kappa
Experienced
- Apr 2, 2019
- 233
I've always been depressed, I have three failed attempts. Part of me hopes that something good will happen even though I don't see it happening. It's easier to just mill through the days than it is to kill yourself. I could get a gun pretty easily because I am in the US. I'm more afraid of it not working. I could be fine, I could be a vegetable, either why I wouldn't want to wake up after.
Last time I failed I woke up with a breathing tube down my throat (they had my sitting straight up) and my hands tied to the bed. Couldn't talk obviously, there was a lot of pressure on my tongue and I felt like I couldn't breath. That's was my first memory because I had been abusing pills for a week straight up to that point. Honestly it was really scary because all the nurse said to me was "don't fight it" over and over and I didn't know what the hell she was talking about. So I guess that's a huge part of why I haven't again. It scared the shit out of me because i didn't know what had happened or why I couldn't breathe or talk at that point.
