What do you guys think of my situation would you ctb ?

[itsover246]

So basically my life has totally turned into a hell scape this year when I came up with the bright idea to come off the SSRIs I had been on for 4 years in the matter of a month and a bit. Came off them felt alright for about 2/3 months then the protracted withdrawal started really fucking my shit up so I panicked went back on em had a severe adverse reaction went full suicidal mode got put in the psych ward.

now I'm left with full blown pssd. Total anhedonia, fully blunted emotions, libido destroyed, severe insomnia, cognitively impaired, tinnitus, memory problems, hairs thinning, muscles wasting, allergic to most foods, weird/no reaction to substances like caffeine alcohol etc to name a few of the symptoms.

From what I can tell from my research is when the case is this bad it's pretty hopeless for it to get better I'm practically left with a completely broken mind at the age of 22. The thought of having to live out the rest of my days with what essentially feels like a severe traumatic brain injury is terrifying. It's like every system in my body has gone into total malfunction suppose it makes sense if the control centre has been fried.

Would you ctb in my shoes ? Suicide is consuming my thoughts more and more as this condition only gets more unpleasant with every day going by. It would just cause so much grief for my family

 

[Dark Moon]

I might have some form of PSSD because I took a couple of high dosage anti deppresant tablets. I didn't get full blown PSSD though. Yes, I would definitely ctb in your situation, the PSSD is incurable from what I know and the other issues you have make life worse.

 

[FuneralCry]

That truly does sound so horrific, it's really so incredibly hellish how people can potentially suffer so much in this existence. But anyway best wishes.

 

[fsociety]

You could try Wellbutrin/bupropion, it increases the libido and works towards pssd!

 

[itsover246]

I might have some form of PSSD because I took a couple of high dosage anti deppresant tablets. I didn't get full blown PSSD though. Yes, I would definitely ctb in your situation, the PSSD is incurable from what I know and the other issues you have make life

I might have some form of PSSD because I took a couple of high dosage anti deppresant tablets. I didn't get full blown PSSD though. Yes, I would definitely ctb in your situation, the PSSD is incurable from what I know and the other issues you have make life worse.

How would you go about ctb in a case like this. Despite my situation I can still feel my si is pretty strong. I would like something peaceful and relatively quick.

 

[Dark Moon]

How would you go about ctb in a case like this. Despite my situation I can still feel my si is pretty strong. I would like something peaceful and relatively quick.

Quick and peaceful methods maybe Nembutal. It's still being sold in Mexico from what I read, I would travel there to buy a bottle if I could but I can't travel.

 

[itsover246]

You could try Wellbutrin/bupropion, it increases the libido and works towards pssd!

don't think I'll react to any kinda drug positivity now I've really fucked

That truly does sound so horrific, it's really so incredibly hellish how people can potentially suffer so much in this existence. But anyway best wishes.

Yeah you always see horrific shit happen to other people thinking it could never happen to you. Then all of a sudden it does

 

[mellie5]

Sexual dysfunction brought by SSRIs does happen but sometimes it improves by switching the SSRI. And it is certainly curable. In any case, here is the Secret Algorithm taken directly from the Secret Doctor's only app:

 

[itsover246]

Quick and peaceful methods don't really exist except for Nembutal. It's still being sold in Mexico from what I read, I would travel there to buy a bottle if I could but I can't travel.

I mean one last holiday would be pretty nice

Sexual dysfunction brought by SSRIs does happen but sometimes it improves by switching the SSRI. And it is certainly curable. In any case, here is the Secret Algorithm taken directly from the Secret Doctor's only app:

View attachment 140024

appreciate the help bro but I wish this was just sexual dysfunction as debilitating as just that would be I think I could live and still get on with my life if that were the only symptom. It's everything else lumped with the sexual dysfunction that makes this a hell you wouldn't wish on a worst enemy.

 

[Vicolo cieco]

I'm completely impotent. When you add to that other types of problems, life becomes unbearable.

 

[itsover246]

I'm completely impotent. When you add to that other types of problems, life becomes unbearable.

Yeah no break or respite from these issues only the feeling of my brain rotting/melting in my head with nothing I can do about it.

 

[mellie5]

@Vicolo cieco basta uscire contromano se ci pensi ;-) cmq is it organic?

@itsover246 while I understand you both a big problem of depression or other problems is developing the idea that there is no way out.

not saying it's your case but sometimes this idea - brought on by depression - takes the form of a delusion, i.e. an unshakeable belief in something no matter what evidence to the contrary is presented.

And then CTB is imho a problem.

Because "I want to feel better but it's impossible, I tried everything" will be experienced as true when it actually isn't. You can show someone a giant list of possible medication and therapies but "it won't work with me and I know so" - which is actually a symptom of a very curable illness.

But I still hope things will go better with you :-)

 

[wsx-rt]

So basically my life has totally turned into a hell scape this year when I came up with the bright idea to come off the SSRIs I had been on for 4 years in the matter of a month and a bit. Came off them felt alright for about 2/3 months then the protracted withdrawal started really fucking my shit up so I panicked went back on em had a severe adverse reaction went full suicidal mode got put in the psych ward.

now I'm left with full blown pssd. Total anhedonia, fully blunted emotions, libido destroyed, severe insomnia, cognitively impaired, tinnitus, memory problems, hairs thinning, muscles wasting, allergic to most foods, weird/no reaction to substances like caffeine alcohol etc to name a few of the symptoms.

From what I can tell from my research is when the case is this bad it's pretty hopeless for it to get better I'm practically left with a completely broken mind at the age of 22. The thought of having to live out the rest of my days with what essentially feels like a severe traumatic brain injury is terrifying. It's like every system in my body has gone into total malfunction suppose it makes sense if the control centre has been fried.

Would you ctb in my shoes ? Suicide is consuming my thoughts more and more as this condition only gets more unpleasant with every day going by. It would just cause so much grief for my family

feelings of guilt and feelings of resentment do not allow us to make a choice and be free to make decisions, I tell myself in such cases: "I am not to blame for anything and I don't owe anything to anyone," it works. Those people who do not allow us to make a free choice in our life are selfish, because it is your life and you are the master in it.

 

[landslide2]

So basically my life has totally turned into a hell scape this year when I came up with the bright idea to come off the SSRIs I had been on for 4 years in the matter of a month and a bit. Came off them felt alright for about 2/3 months then the protracted withdrawal started really fucking my shit up so I panicked went back on em had a severe adverse reaction went full suicidal mode got put in the psych ward.

now I'm left with full blown pssd. Total anhedonia, fully blunted emotions, libido destroyed, severe insomnia, cognitively impaired, tinnitus, memory problems, hairs thinning, muscles wasting, allergic to most foods, weird/no reaction to substances like caffeine alcohol etc to name a few of the symptoms.

From what I can tell from my research is when the case is this bad it's pretty hopeless for it to get better I'm practically left with a completely broken mind at the age of 22. The thought of having to live out the rest of my days with what essentially feels like a severe traumatic brain injury is terrifying. It's like every system in my body has gone into total malfunction suppose it makes sense if the control centre has been fried.

Would you ctb in my shoes ? Suicide is consuming my thoughts more and more as this condition only gets more unpleasant with every day going by. It would just cause so much grief for my family

your mind and body has taken a beating and needs time to heal. what does the doc say about all this, especially timeline and alternatives? if my mind and body is going through all that, any research i do (google?) is gonna be negatively skewed and incomplete.

 

[Vicolo cieco]

cmq is it organic?

One doctor said it is caused by fibrosis of the corpora cavernosa, another doctor said it's a psychological issue. I think the problem is organic because I can't even masturbate and I don't have morning erections.

 

[UKscotty]

No one can decide for you or advise.

Some people have great physical health and plenty of money but CTB due to depression. Some people have massive hardship and difficulties but thrive and love life.

It's subjective to each of us.

Good luck whatever you decide x

 

[mellie5]

One doctor said it is caused by fibrosis of the corpora cavernosa, another doctor said it's a psychological issue. I think the problem is organic because I can't even masturbate and I don't have morning erections.

well yk it's difficult to say anything sensible by internet on why something like this is happening. I imagine you checked hormone levels. I mean it's very tricky bcs some people only have the morning ones when they are relaxed (i.e. without stress).

There are actually serious specialist studies for this in which they attach a thin strip of paper to the penis which will snap or stretch if the patient has erections while asleep (which rules out an organic cause). I have no idea what kind of paper, how thin and where they attach it and how. I think doctors who are subspecialists in this are not easy to find though.

But ofc if you are here a psychological condition can't be ruled out and as to what should excite you when alone, people are so different and are differently stimulated by so many different things that who knows...

... also I am not asking but people react differently at different ages.

and maybe you are just not as interested as before? sometimes men who have had the same wife/gf for years subconsciously start seeing her as a sister. OK my sentence is assuming heterosexuality but it's the same principle. And some get such complicated subconscious problems because the subconscious regards the act itself (alone or with others) as reprehensible and blocks the whole thing (how can I do this to someone I love? how can I expect the mouth that kisses my children to do such things?). But this is already psychoanalysis, not urology, not psychiatry and not psychology.

Some bad people with bad tendencies, we know which ones, but can still contain them, get prescribed cyproterone acetate, which kills their sex drive. So they don't have any will for sex and really don't care about having erections or not. I mean as a thought exercise one can wonder if someone with an incurable organic problem who is depressed or anxious about it, would be helped by a medicine that makes him not care about it. I never heard or read or seen cyproterone ac. being used in this way though.

In any case I hope you feel better soon. E quando si entra in un vicolo cieco senza uscita piu' si va avanti piu' sembra buio, ma riuscendo a rigirarsi si vede l'uscita, che, in fondo e' stata sempre la'.

 

[thealteredmind]

FUCKING PSSD.
how long have you been like that?

 

[itsover246]

FUCKING PSSD.
how long have you been like that?

Few months now

 

[thealteredmind]

Few months now

what is few months? give an exact number man. I have the same thing but all symptoms (except one) improved.
I was a vegetable... I think I'm at 11 months now. everything improved except my... how to say it... my spirit. simply... I'm not the same person I was before the medication. the small tired soul I had... has gone. now what is left is to destroy the physical body. I do not expect to recover but I said to myself I'm giving myself this year. that would be like... 1 1/2 years in total.

maybe you will improve, no one nows. maybe not. maybe yes.