What do you feel most of the time

[always_sad]

I feel nothing. 80% of the time I feel nothing, 20% is uncomfortable feelings like despair, sadness or anger. Regardless of what's going on. I often forget huge chunks of my days, as if they never happened in the first place. I often forget I exist.
Things I used to enjoy when I was younger do not make me feel anything. I don't care about people. I don't care about success. All food tastes the same. I don't care what happens tomorrow. I don't remember what it's like to want to experience good things
My blood tests are perfect and I don't really have any bad habits. I don't harm myself and I practice normal levels of self care. So that's funny
The numbness is driving me insane

 

[nothinghereforme]

Physical pain and anger and sadness all at once very intensely at all times

 

[Michi_Violeta]

A constant longing, emptiness, weakness, lack of drive; guilt and conflict when I feel close to forgetting about her.

 

[Namelesa]

I mostly feel empty, bored or exhausted

 

[seekingnothingness]

Constant extreme anxiety

 

[human909]

Depressed and severe anxiety that i would do something wrong In front of people.

 

[resurgence]

empty, anxious, numb, and more currently in pain thats bad enough i dont have time to crashout over my mental health atm

 

[Promised Heaven]

Almost always on edge. Self fulfilling prophesy where I make my life worse by unintentionally damaging them in the name of protecting it. I'm guarding the little will I have to live but I know I'll destroy it too.

 

[bananaolympus]

Depression, apathy, boredom sometimes anxiety

 

[Regen]

Joylessness

 

[WhiteRabbit]

physical pain and despair

 

[Hollowman]

I feel almost completely dead inside. Every once in a while a little emotion comes out.

 

[Forever Sleep]

The majority of the time: fed up, frustrated, worried, resentful, unhappy. Life just feels like falling with no safety net. Just grabbing hold of whatevers around but ultimately, just wanting to let go and smash into the ground.

 

[Flightless Wings]

Blank. Not really bothered but not happy either. Bored. Listless.

 

[billie]

sadness

 

[beseechgod]

Disillusioned

 

[E Butler]

Fear. Just ineffable ruminating fear and anxiety.

 

[unworthy_]

As of now
I am not afraid of suicide nor death
What I afraid most is leaving my family, my pets, friends whom I would leave behind shocked and depressed.
Also I have to make sure they can claim my pension money and prepare my own funeral (cremation)

Cant just leave like that..

Recent broke up left me empty..
I am in constant pain mentally and physically (my immunity went havoc from depression/stress that left me with pompholyx)

 

[OptingOutSmiling]

I don't know anymore. Today it's sadness, yet emptiness. Like in a dark pit, not knowing how or if I can be whole again, or if I even was before. Like there is no hope of a future. I walk around with sunglasses crying. The reality around daunting, unreal. Don't even know who I am, or why I'm here. Days like today, the darkness tells me there is only one option left. That I'm not strong enough for this world anymore. Trying to fight but for what, and how? Tired. Is there even strength left for goodbye? A day like today happens more and more. Thanks for allowing me to be here today. Love to everyone.

 

[Forveleth]

Mostly anger at the people who pushed me here (including myself) and a deep sadness (almost mourning) for the way my life has turned out.

 

[FuneralCry]

I just feel so tired of suffering in this torturous, futile existence and as long as I exist I'll only hope and wish to not exist, I just wish for permanent peace from the abomination of existence and peace is all I hope for, I find it really painful to suffer in this existence that was so tragically imposed, I suffer because I was unfortunate enough to be burdened with this existence that just caused suffering all for the sake of it and problems there were never a need for, I truly would never wish for any of this.

I'd always prefer to not exist than suffer in this existence I always saw as the most terrible tragic mistake, it's so horrific to me how a human can suffer for so long with no limit as to how much they can be tortured just to die in agony from old age and I suffer so much from how the option for me to peacefully prevent all future suffering in this existence where I'm just waiting to die anyway is denied. All I wish and hope for is to never suffer ever again, I just want to fall asleep permanently, in this cruel existence where there's all this endless suffering non-existence truly is all that's positive for me.

 

[plan c]

Rage, regret, guilt... can always come up with words, but doesn't cover much about it. Perhaps it's a good thing to forget. I've lost track of the things and people that are lost and will never return.

 

[Johnzaga23]

anxiety

 

[WeDontKnowTheFuture]

I do not feel much emotions but when it comes it is generally sadness, anger and frustration. I feel very empty and unable to do anything to reduce the suffering, like if i was used by higher powers as a puppet.

 

[Arrival03]

Either nothing, anger, or anxiety

 

[WatchmeBurn]

Despair, sadness, hopelessness, anxiety, frustration, anger.

I never feel 'nothing'. My emotions aren't numb, they're intense an heavy, weighing down on me like an anchor in my guts. The problem is that they're always negative.

 

[Languish]

I feel hollow. It's as if the gravity was increased by 10 times. Every step taken is a monumental effort in which I lack the strength to take.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Tired. Empty. Resolved.

 

[DoneWithThisLife]

Anger, sadness, emotional numbness, constant severe anxiety with often a panic attack thrown in for good measure. It's no way to live.

 

[AjolaX]

In my personal experience, the exact distribution of feelings changes quite a lot over time if you're affected by Depression/ Anxiety or similar Disorders for a longer period of time... Sometimes you might feel just nothing at all for seemingly endless periods of time, which is a lot more challenging then most people would anticipate. Other times you might feel overwhelmed by all the negative feelings rushing you at once and feel like a huge weight on top of you, pressing you to the ground. And sometimes you might even feel something positive coming to your mind suddenly, an activity your motivated to do or you wonder about enjoying your time for a while... All of these states have become part of our every day lifes and sometimes the line between them can even blur to a degree where it seems nearly impossible to figure out which state you're even in right now.
So as you may be able to tell now it's really, really difficult answering questions like 'Is it 60% sadness and 40% emptiness now or the other way around' and it's also not particularly useful in understanding and improving ourselves. That's why I made it my mission instead to at least capture some of the more/ most common feelings associated with these illnesses on this forum in the following bullet points:
- Pain/Frustration
- Sadness/Joylessness
- Emptiness/Numbness
- Exhaustion/Weakness
- Lack of drive/motivation
- Anxiety/Fear/Hopelessness
(- Anger/ Regret)

Thank you for reading and feel free to comment if you have something to add
Kind regards, AjolaX