tl;dr
"How to Get More Hollow and Numb Every Day 101" feat. run on sentences
Working Days:
-wake up, probably after an episode of intermittent insomnia
-some exercise, eat breakfast, drink coffee, shower
-read some articles and play some games if i have the time because of inconsistent working schedule
-probably give up after not even being able to focus on a video game
-go to work for 6 - 12 hours of misery
-be an awkward failure doing boring minimum wage shit
-break down in the bathroom
-go back home in the evening
-try to game but'll probably have an ADD episode again if nobody's around on discord
-go for a walk, drink heavily or have a joint or two
-try to force myself to either go to sleep or fall asleep
Days off:
-wake up, probably lay in bed until 11:30 to not be an absolute zombie after working days
-some exercise, eat breakfast, drink coffee, shower
-read a bit, play some games, force myself to actually fucking focus
-do random shit, sit around, waste time
-think about self-improvement, procrastinate python anyway
-watch streams or some movies/shows
-sneak in some midday drinking because I lost all fucks given and hiding tipsiness and smell is the only thrill i get anymore
-go for a run or to the local swimming pool for some natural endorphins at least
-that was fun, time to waste some more time
-break down
-play with my cat
-either have an insomnia episode or just simply sit around until 4 AM, alt-tabbing WoW to watch random memes, or just stale blankly at the wall sine I'm addicted to thinking, all of this only intensifying the aforementioned insomnia and doesn't help with anything
-break down again
Depression should really be called Schrödinger's Syndrome. It's like being dead and not dead at the same time.
Aye, well said.