What can be written in a suicide note to alleviate guilt and help them move on?

[clawsofperdition]

i'm only writing a note to my family because i want them to move on and be happy and guilt free. I don't really know what to write in it.
I'd also like to add that i have a few items made for friends who i won't be seeing before i die so if by any chance they happen to see them they could pass it onto them but I don't know if that's insensitive or maybe i shouldn't.

 

[whotookmylexapro]

My suicide notes usually are like "please do not remember me. It is not what i want and my intention is not to make you suffer. Please just move on to minimize the suffering. Its out of your control and nothing would have changed it"

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I plan to use my note as a weapon, against myself, specifically by targeting my own dignity and ego. Anyone who reads the note, if they have a sane rational mind, will see just how much of a truly terrible and undeserving person I am. My note already contains plenty of insults hurled at anyone who shows sympathy or remorse for my death but in case anyone is still too stupid to realize just how evil I am I will include all of my misdeeds and wrongdoings, even ones I don't mention in here. Hopefully I'll be able to at least make most people who knew me happy that I'm finally gone and no longer around to menace society.

 

[fade to black]

i'm only writing a note to my family because i want them to move on and be happy and guilt free. I don't really know what to write in it.
I'd also like to add that i have a few items made for friends who i won't be seeing before i die so if by any chance they happen to see them they could pass it onto them but I don't know if that's insensitive or maybe i shouldn't.

I choose not to leave one. Just directions to find my stash of gold and silver for my friend that promised me he's take care of my dog if something ever happened to me.

 

[benhurray]

nothing

 

[Forever Sleep]

Stuff like- there's nothing they could have done to help. I didn't want to tell them because there was nothing they could have done to help and I didn't want to make them worry. That this was something I wanted for a very long time. That, perhaps it's unrealistic but, I would want them to feel relieved for me. That I really hated the idea that it would hurt them. That I hung on for as long as I could for the people it was most likely to affect to die first but realistically- you can't live your entire life for the sake of other people. That I wish them all the best in their lives. And, if I have caused them hurt- I hope they can forgive me.

 

[Privateer2368]

Why would I wish them to avoid guilt or move on?

 

[LunarLight]

You can tell them it's not their fault and there's nothing they could have done to stop you.

 

[BlueCup]

I would record a video instead of a note and share it using gmail scheduled send.

I would talk about my suffering but also my life in general, not only sad stuff.

 

[BoulderSoWhat]

I attempted CTB a few months ago after my 30th bday. I've had ideation since I was a kid though. I live by myself and disconnected from friends and family over a year ago.

The month leading up to the attempt, I considered journaling everyday in a word document, that I know would've ultimately been opened when my laptop was discovered. Because my thinking was more complex than I could ever get out in one sitting or one instance of trying to say "this is what I think and feel," I thought logging the depths and nuances of my thinking would be some kind of consolation to others that this wasn't impulsive, but more a 30 year long process coming to a conclusion.

But ultimately I decided against it. For my situation, the last month of being alone and alive, in a way this was my method of breaking up with being alive. I needed and wanted my focus to only be on myself and making sure that I was sure about going through with it.

And also I figured, no matter what I say or don't say in any letters left behind, I can't guarantee any control or influence how others would react or process my death. Staying alive is to risk unforeseen suffering. Staying alive is to risk losing people. The people who would have learned of my death, by being alive they have accepted these risks despite any rosy pictures they may have about life's "beauty" or whatever.

Eh I rambled a little. I guess this isn't really an answer at all because I consider "moving on" and acceptance of things, ultimately that responsibility falls on the individual, no matter the influence or not others may have on that processing. And I just don't have any strong enough feelings for my family to consider expending that energy to be worthwhile.

Sorry, this probably isn't a helpful response at all :(

 

[deletedaccount30982]

You can write anything you want, but it's the nature of grief, especially in the case of suicide, that people will feel how they want irregardless of a note. Note or not, some will be angry at you, some will struggle to get over losing you even after an extended period of time, some will be deeply depressed, some will blame themselves, some will follow a generally "typical" cycle of grief and then move on relatively smoothly (as smooth as grief can be). Nothing you can do or say will truly make a big difference. The only benefit is that it will give them answers. They will follow whatever grieving path, but they will not be wondering why. I plan on not leaving a specific note, but keeping my journal nearby and open so that my internal thoughts can answer the question of why. I have never lost anyone to suicide, but I know in my years of watching suicide media that it is often said by survivors that they just don't understand why their loved one did it.