Hello everyone,
As the title already said what are your reasons to be here? I am quite curious of your reasons and specially interested if anybody can relate to my reasons.
For my turn it is my belief to be inferior in every category in life. Meaning: physical ability, cognitive ability and social skills. More worse my character is absolute garbage. I am constantly comparing my self to others and I have to realize that the average person is superior to me. And this makes me soo jealous. Its hard to describe how jealos I am of somebody with better genes. If there were the possibillity to kill someone for better genes, I would probably do it.
I tried my whole life to keep it up with others but I cant. Its so depressing to wittness that the average person gets 2 times better results with 1/2 of the effort compared to me. I am very aware of the fact that I was never the best version of my self, but I am pretty sure that my best version of my self would at its best under-average. And I am not willing to give everything to be under-average. I am just tired to get humilated in my mind every day. I wrote "in my mind" because the people, who I am comparing to just live their normal life without the intention of humilating me. As I said because of my stupid comparison habit I get very mad and jealos and therfore unlikeable and therefore socially isolated. This summer I gave basically up. Till now I live in total isolation at home. For information I am in my mid twenties.
In Nazi-Germany the Nazis used the term "lebensunwertes Leben" for people they killed in KZ's and other facilities. The english translation for this term is ~ "life, which is not worthy to live" This is exactly my feeling about my life.
I think I have many similarities with the incel-phenomen but with the difference that I had sex. Another distinction is that the hate and violence goes against myself and not against so called Chads and Staceys.
Thank you for reading. I know its bad written and I am very aware of that depression killes concentration. So, thank you again.
As the title already said what are your reasons to be here? I am quite curious of your reasons and specially interested if anybody can relate to my reasons.
For my turn it is my belief to be inferior in every category in life. Meaning: physical ability, cognitive ability and social skills. More worse my character is absolute garbage. I am constantly comparing my self to others and I have to realize that the average person is superior to me. And this makes me soo jealous. Its hard to describe how jealos I am of somebody with better genes. If there were the possibillity to kill someone for better genes, I would probably do it.
I tried my whole life to keep it up with others but I cant. Its so depressing to wittness that the average person gets 2 times better results with 1/2 of the effort compared to me. I am very aware of the fact that I was never the best version of my self, but I am pretty sure that my best version of my self would at its best under-average. And I am not willing to give everything to be under-average. I am just tired to get humilated in my mind every day. I wrote "in my mind" because the people, who I am comparing to just live their normal life without the intention of humilating me. As I said because of my stupid comparison habit I get very mad and jealos and therfore unlikeable and therefore socially isolated. This summer I gave basically up. Till now I live in total isolation at home. For information I am in my mid twenties.
In Nazi-Germany the Nazis used the term "lebensunwertes Leben" for people they killed in KZ's and other facilities. The english translation for this term is ~ "life, which is not worthy to live" This is exactly my feeling about my life.
I think I have many similarities with the incel-phenomen but with the difference that I had sex. Another distinction is that the hate and violence goes against myself and not against so called Chads and Staceys.
Thank you for reading. I know its bad written and I am very aware of that depression killes concentration. So, thank you again.
