B
Bend Sinister
Member
- May 27, 2020
- 12
There is a common theme around here about planning. Planning for the big day and all the preparation that goes into it.
Mine will be about making amends a far as I am able. This may be just a call to someone to have a final conversation and maybe close out a few things. Maybe a favour I needed to have done. Maybe its just giving a book back, I borrowed and never read. Some little and some not so little.
Anyone else think this or is it now too late or even just pointless. I just want to give the people I leave behind a bit of peace and closure. I am leaving people behind and I know this. They wont understand but they will move and accept it and time heals.
I was also going to record a song for my children to play on their birthdays. Stash it on a memory stick. Too selfish and painful? A song from a corpse who despite his best endeavours didn't stay dead. Seems a bad idea now I think of it and actually terrible. Ok if I checked out through illness I think but I`m crashing the birthday I disinvited myself too.
Covid-19 I`m here. They won`t ever suspect and then people can understand, accept, grieve and move on.
So can I.
I can leave this husk, this nightmare of a life that I created.
Kiss me for luck, one last time....
Mine will be about making amends a far as I am able. This may be just a call to someone to have a final conversation and maybe close out a few things. Maybe a favour I needed to have done. Maybe its just giving a book back, I borrowed and never read. Some little and some not so little.
Anyone else think this or is it now too late or even just pointless. I just want to give the people I leave behind a bit of peace and closure. I am leaving people behind and I know this. They wont understand but they will move and accept it and time heals.
I was also going to record a song for my children to play on their birthdays. Stash it on a memory stick. Too selfish and painful? A song from a corpse who despite his best endeavours didn't stay dead. Seems a bad idea now I think of it and actually terrible. Ok if I checked out through illness I think but I`m crashing the birthday I disinvited myself too.
Covid-19 I`m here. They won`t ever suspect and then people can understand, accept, grieve and move on.
So can I.
I can leave this husk, this nightmare of a life that I created.
Kiss me for luck, one last time....