Venting

[lanahelp]

I can't take the pain of Lyme disease and what it stole from me… everything. Mostly my sanity. I have N and I plan to go before the holidays. I'm terrified and angry. And I don't understand how beings can reach a point where pain is so great, that CTB seems the only way to peace. I'm there. I fought for 6 years. I believe I'm finally ready, no matter how afraid. Fucking ticks won. I had so much left to do and give back. May we all find peace over pain, whatever that means for you. I had hoped I could transcend and start over. But it just never got better.

 

[Darkover]

to the void you go for all time there's nothing grand about this universe just the inevitable demise of everything

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I've done research on Lyme disease and its ramifications. I did that years ago when I thought I had it, but I ended up having hypothyroidism. I remember reading about it and it was terrifying. I know the symptoms can be life-long with little relief available from the medical establishment. I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's almost unimaginable that a stinking little tick and wreak so much havoc on a body. I hope you can get some peace, no matter how you have to go after it, from this insidious disease.

 

[FuneralCry]

That disease does sound so horrific, it really is beyond awful how the human body can torture beings to such an extreme extent, causing them to suffer so extremely. There's simply nothing fair about any of this and of course it's such an cruel existence that brings people to this point. But at least you have the option of a peaceful method, I so envy those who have N, it certainly sounds like the best way to ctb to me. I hope that you find the freedom that you wish for.