Utterly Useless

[Intheo]

I'm a failure to my parents. I have spent my entire life fighting this condition and it has kept in the same place in life ever since. I have not moved forward at all. It took me basically 7 years to get a bachelor's degree in a useless major. Now I find myself with no real employable skills, too old for the one shitty industry I can maybe do, with a totally irrelevant degree, with very little savings and still living off my parents. I can't even be hired for menial jobs because they want a 20 year old to boss around and I'm overqualified. I have to go back to school to make any change, and I don't have the money. My aging parents can support me only so much.

I mentioned before that I may be looking at prison time. My plan is to ctb if that happens. If I go to prison, I have even more obstacles in life after I get out.
Part of me doesn't want the case to be dropped because this gives me the perfect excuse. If I'm let free, I am still left with all the problems I mentioned, and this hole is getting deeper as I get older and poorer.

 

[timf]

Many years ago a man was being interviewed on the TV show 60 minutes. The interviewer asked him if he was scared about the possibility of going to prison. He answered, "The first time you go to prison, you are scared. The second time, you know to bring your toothbrush".

Prison may offer a similar lack of options that Army life does. If someone can adjust to a Spartan life, one may find the ability to survive at a basic level. From there one can build something more concrete. You may even find the opportunity to take courses so that you can complete a degree that is more useful.

 

[Intheo]

Many years ago a man was being interviewed on the TV show 60 minutes. The interviewer asked him if he was scared about the possibility of going to prison. He answered, "The first time you go to prison, you are scared. The second time, you know to bring your toothbrush".

Prison may offer a similar lack of options that Army life does. If someone can adjust to a Spartan life, one may find the ability to survive at a basic level. From there one can build something more concrete. You may even find the opportunity to take courses so that you can complete a degree that is more useful.

This isn't a story of a man who's lived a sinful life and turned it around in prison. I'm a criminal due to a technicality. I did nothing wrong on a moral level; I never hurt anyone or stole anything. I did no harm to society. If anything I was trying to change into a better person. I would go to prison knowing that the only reason I'm there is because the system is unjust, not myself.

Prison in my country isn't like prison in a first world country like Norway. There's no welfare or courses for rehabilitation lol. If you knew how my government worked, you'd laugh at the idea. Most ex-cons become taxi drivers or go right back to raping. I'd be in with child-molesters and rapists and murderers who actually might have shorter sentences than me. I was in the Army, another bullshit exercise of government coercion, and the justification for my sentence would be even flimsier than sending me to bootcamp.

Yes sure I could survive and get out, assuming they don't give me a life sentence (which is actually a possibility). But the question would become, why should I? Why should I want to survive this? Why would I continue being part of society that punished me for trying to attempt an innocuous method for healing?