BitterlyAlive_

BitterlyAlive_

-
Dec 8, 2020
2,394
Does anyone know what happened to RileyTanaka?
 
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StuFin

StuFin

Arcanist
Oct 21, 2020
450
is @marcusuk63 still with us? He's normally on every day, hasn't been here since Sunday?
 
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mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

Visionary
Apr 2, 2020
2,404
I haven't seen @leiche for a while.
 
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G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,017
What happened to @Eren? I see the name crossed out, and he is lurking. Did I miss something that happened and there was a ban?
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
Anyone know what happened to @Worthless_nobody ? (Raven Moon).
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
Anyone know what happened to @Worthless_nobody ? (Raven Moon).
She didn't feel like this was the kind and welcoming community she'd grown to know and love. I think you caught part of that thread. She originally self banned but unbanned to speak her mind once more in said thread. I figure she self banned a second time.
 
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mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

Visionary
Apr 2, 2020
2,404
She didn't feel like this was the kind and welcoming community she'd grown to know and love. I think you caught part of that thread. She originally self banned but unbanned to speak her mind once more in said thread. I figure she self banned a second time.
She was the one who doxxed me and was banned for it.
 
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Sinkinshyp

Sinkinshyp

Paragon
Sep 7, 2020
947
I thought you said fthe26 got your picture off this forum earlier @mahakali88 ? How did Ravenmoon dox you? she doesn't know your name
 
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Sinkinshyp

Sinkinshyp

Paragon
Sep 7, 2020
947
Ravenoon changed her name to worthlessnobody the other day. She & I talk. She has asked for an admin to please unban her account long enough to set the record straight with her. Than they can reban her after the discussion. She says her email is not active to please reactivate her account so she can mail you and than reban her @Marquis
They knew my name from Jeremy, I guess.
shes on the phone right now upset. Jeremy never told her anything about you.
 
mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

Visionary
Apr 2, 2020
2,404
She was the one who gave info to FT26?
Yes. I think someone helped her and gave her the screenshot, and I have a pretty good idea who that might be, but I will not name names publicly or privately.

Anyway, it is against the rules to discuss banned users here, and I do not want to get a warning.
Ravenoon changed her name to worthlessnobody the other day. She & I talk. She has asked for an admin to please unban her account long enough to set the record straight with her. Than they can reban her after the discussion. She says her email is not active to please reactivate her account so she can mail you and than reban her @Marquis

shes on the phone right now upset. Jeremy never told her anything about you.
Jeremy told fixthe26 my name, I presume. The DM they published on Twitter, from the person who doxxed me used similar language she used, but I was certain that a friend of hers sent that DM. And I still am.
D
I thought you said fthe26 got your picture off this forum earlier @mahakali88 ? How did Ravenmoon dox you? she doesn't know your name

The pictures were deleted from that thread on Oct 25th. Someone took a screenshot before they were deleted. A member had a meltdown over something BPG told her around that time and possibly took screenshots.
 
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Good4Nothing

Good4Nothing

Unlovable
May 8, 2020
1,865
Well, this is a fucking mess...

And StuFin is gone now, too?
WTF is happening here?
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
Well, this is a fucking mess...

And StuFin is gone now, too?
WTF is happening here?
Nothing out of the ordinary. Most leave to recover. Some of us get stuck in limbo, such as me, and you... :hug:
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Right now, I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,896
Nothing out of the ordinary. Most leave to recover. Some of us get stuck in limbo, such as me, and you... :hug:
Do you know if any of them still check in? I'd love to know what recovery feels like and if I am actually succeeding.
 
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Weather

Weather

Student
Oct 18, 2020
152
I never really talked to @GoodPersonEffed, but she was obviously such a big part of the forum. It feels weird to me that folks are just... posting. Like, the world goes on, even with this little vacuum in it. I remember feeling that same way when someone I was close to in real life died -- they were old and sick and it wasn't unexpected, but the same feeling of "if the world has ended, how is it that it keeps going."
 
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J

justsad&done

Visionary
Nov 11, 2020
2,804
I never really talked to @GoodPersonEffed, but she was obviously such a big part of the forum. It feels weird to me that folks are just... posting. Like, the world goes on, even with this little vacuum in it. I remember feeling that same way when someone I was close to in real life died -- they were old and sick and it wasn't unexpected, but the same feeling of "if the world has ended, how is it that it keeps going."
Very true. For me when someone I was very close to died, part of me died too and even when someone I don't know well dies, there is a sense of emptiness and loss. And yet the world still goes on around us. It makes me sad.
 
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BitterlyAlive_

BitterlyAlive_

-
Dec 8, 2020
2,394
It feels weird to me that folks are just... posting. Like, the world goes on, even with this little vacuum in it.
I felt this way when I found out Faust and Woxi passed too.
 
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RainAndSadness

RainAndSadness

Administrator
Jun 12, 2018
2,145
Regarding the passing of active and contributing members... I talked about a very similar subject back in 2019, from a more general viewpoint. Take a look at this thread, if you're curious about the opinion of a 2019 RainAndSadness, struggling to comprehend the same questions that were asked in this thread. I was also concerned with the subject of passing members and raised some general questions about active, inactive and passed members in this forum. It's worth a read in my opinion. I created this thread almost one year ago but considering it touched a very similar issue, maybe it helps to give some perspective into my thought process and what was going on in my mind back then:
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/passed-and-inactive-members.28277/

Now, let's fast forward to 2020 and talk about today, much has changed. Right? Well, not really. GPE did contribute a lot to this forum and they were extremely active and wrote many high-quality posts. But there were members of the calibre of people like GPE in the past. We had many members in the past that were adored by the community for their compassion, support and their contribution to the community... they all left a long time ago and well... the sad truth is, they all seem to be forgotten nowadays because most members that could remember them simply have passed away as well. Sonnenblume was one of them, throwback to May 2018, when the forum was fresh and young.
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sonnenblume.404/
I just registered in the forum when I heard about her passing and the community was shocked and stunned. She left via SN and contributed a lot to this method, back when barely anything was known about it. But nobody is talking about her anymore, it's like she never existed. I don't doubt that the same cycle is gonna repeat itself in this case too. We're all gonna die or leave this forum someday and will be replaced with new people that don't know much about the previous generation of members. And I'll be one of them, once I manage to ctb... there will be a point in this forum when nobody will even know who the fuck I was. This is gonna happen to all of us. It's inevitable.
Again, look at the goodbye thread for Sonnenblume. Basically all of the people that left a comment in that thread, with a few exceptions, have left the forum. They're either are crossed out or stopped being active.

Now, regarding the pain and grief that comes with goobye threads... as someone who has been here for 2.5 years, I can confirm that this is very difficult topic. It still is. And it will never get any easier, doesn't matter how many of us pass away, it's always gonna hit me right there, in my chest. It's extremely stressful, that's why I started to keep some distance between myself and others - no offense to any of you, I really appreciate you all but I witnessed this process of dying friends a bit way too often for my taste... and this is merely self-protection at this point. You know, getting close to people is a very unhealthy thing in this forum. For one simple reason: every time a close friend passes away, and this will eventually happen in a forum like this, it will crush you. No doubt. That's a very hurtful process and it's though to deal with.

I've seen so many friends go. I just need to go through my message history and count all the members with a crossed name to get a sense of the sheer amount of dead accounts... and keep in mind, with each passing day, this grave yard in this forum, this sad desert of goodbye threads is becoming larger and larger. Every goodbye thread means one more dead member. And considering the amount of members that aren't active anymore, at this point... It's very possible that the amount of dead members already outweigh the living ones.

I don't like when people leave, suicide is tragic and I wish nobody would have to feel the need to end their life but I also understand that this is a cruel world and people in this community are suffering a lot. Not all of us receive help. Not all of us can be helped. And maybe some don't even want help. I'm also done struggling and for many of us, suicide is the only way out. I know the many stories of the people here, I've talked to them... for the last 2.5 years, the reasons why people ctb are as diverse as they could be and I'm grateful that we have this place that allows every struggling individual to have a voice and a place to talk about their suffering. This forum fulfills a very important role in that aspect, a role that is often ignored by society.

And if you look at the amount of active members that registered back in 2018, it will give you some decent insight into this subject from my perspective. There simply aren't many of us left. It's just a tiny handful of people and I'm confident most of them passed away. Some hopefully made it successfully into recovery. I really hope it, I'm very glad when people find an escape to their struggling. But what I'm about to say: this cycle - people passing away, new people arriving - is never gonna end. In 2 years, it's possible that 2019 members will be extremely rare minority as well. This forum is like a train station, we're all heading towards our destination. And those destinations might look very different depending on your goals and wishes. Some decide to give life another chance and keep their journey going. But many of us - me included - are waiting for that one-way bus that never comes back.
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I've been here a while. I think about those I've lost frequently and about those I was close to almost every day.
It's natural that life moves on, but nothing is ever forgotten as long as memory still holds.
All the people I've known, in my life and on here, have left their mark on me one way or another. Some have changed me in quite profound ways. I carry that forward with me and in that way, I think something of them still lives in the changed person that I am. I also try to remember them and to keep what I learned from them in my memory.
 
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BitterlyAlive_

BitterlyAlive_

-
Dec 8, 2020
2,394
Regarding the passing of active and contributing members... I talked about a very similar subject back in 2019, from a more general viewpoint. Take a look at this thread, if you're curious about the opinion of a 2019 RainAndSadness, struggling to comprehend the same questions that were asked in this thread. I was also concerned with the subject of passing members and raised some general questions about active, inactive and passed members in this forum. It's worth a read in my opinion. I created this thread almost one year ago but considering it touched a very similar issue, maybe it helps to give some perspective into my thought process and what was going on in my mind back then:
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/passed-and-inactive-members.28277/

Now, let's fast forward to 2020 and talk about today, much has changed. Right? Well, not really. GPE did contribute a lot to this forum and they were extremely active and wrote many high-quality posts. But there were members of the calibre of people like GPE in the past. We had many members in the past that were adored by the community for their compassion, their contribution to the community... they all left a long time ago, back in 2018 or 2019 and well... the sad truth is, they all seem to be forgotten nowadays because most members that could remember them simply have passed away as well. Sonnenblume was one of them, throwback to May 2018, when the forum was fresh and young.
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sonnenblume.404/
I just registered in the forum when I heard about her passing and the community was shocked and stunned. She left via SN and contributed a lot to this method, back when barely anything was known about it. But nobody is talking about her anymore, it's like she never existed. I don't doubt that the same cycle is gonna repeat itself in this case too. We're all gonna die or leave this forum someday and be replaced with new people that don't know much about the previous generation of members. And I'll be one of them, once I decide to ctb... there will be a point in this forum when nobody will even know who the fuck I was. This is gonna happen to all of us. It's inevitable.
Look at the goodbye thread for Sonnenblume. Basically all of the people that left a comment in that thread, with a few exceptions, have left the forum. They're either are crossed out or stopped being active.

Now.. as someone who has been here for 2.5 years, I can confirm that this is very difficult topic. It still is. And it will never get any easier, doesn't matter how many of us pass away, it's always gonna hit me right there, in my chest. It's extremely stressful, that's why I started to keep some distance between myself and others - no offense to any of you, I really appreciate you all but I witnessed this process of dying friends a bit way too often for my taste... and this is merely self-protection at this point. You know, getting close to people is a very unhealthy thing in this forum. For one simple reason: every time a close friend passes away, and this will eventually happen in a forum like this, it will crush you. No doubt. That's a very hurtful process and it's though to deal with.

I've seen so many friends go. I just need to go through my message history and count all the members with a crossed name to get a sense of the sheer amount of dead accounts... and keep in mind, with each passing day, this grave yard in this forum, this sad desert of goodbye threads is becoming larger and larger. Every goodbye thread means one more dead member. And considering the amount of members that aren't active anymore, at this point... It's very possible that the amount of dead members already outweigh the living ones.

I don't like when people leave, suicide is tragic and I wish nobody would have to feel the need to end their life but I also understand that this is a cruel world and people are suffering a lot in this community. Not all of us receive help. Not all of us can be helped. And maybe some don't even want help. I know the many stories of the people here, I've talked to them... for the last 2.5 years, the reasons why people ctb are as diverse as they could be and I'm grateful that we have this place that allows every struggling individual to have a voice and a place to talk about their suffering. This forum fulfills a very important role in that aspect, a role that is often ignored by society.

And if you look at the amount of active members that registered back in 2018, it will give you some decent insight into this subject from my perspective. There simply aren't many of us left. It's just a tiny handful of people and I'm confident most of them passed away. Some hopefully made it successfully into recovery. I really hope it, I'm very glad when people find an escape to their struggling. But what I'm about to say: this cycle - people passing away, new people arriving - is never gonna end. In 2 years, it's possible that 2019 members will be extremely rare minority as well. This forum is like a train station, we're all heading towards our destination. And those destinations might look very different depending on your goals and wishes. Many of us - me included - are waiting for that one-way bus that never comes back.
This is an incredibly good post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, and for giving examples from your time spent here. I don't regret saying what I said on GPE's thread before it was locked, and this lays out why.
 
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D

Deleted member 19276

Wizard
Jun 28, 2020
682
If by any chance @WinterFaust is still active and sees this, I'd hope she is in recovery!
 
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epic

epic

Enlightened
Aug 9, 2019
1,813
Anyone knows where is @Epsilon0 .
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/members/epsilon0.13451/#recent-content
 
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Sherri

Sherri

Archangel
Sep 28, 2020
13,794
Gromit gave me his cell phone number. Wanted to be with him during his final moments. I've sent a message yesterday just to talk to him in the "afterlife" the message was delivered and read. Probably some family member has it I guess. Anyways I didn't say much. Just wrote that I miss him still and will always do. Won't to it again just in case.
 
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Nymph

Nymph

he/him
Jul 15, 2020
2,565
Gromit gave me his cell phone number. Wanted to be with him during his final moments. I've sent a message yesterday just to talk to him in the "afterlife" the message was delivered and read. Probably some family member has it I guess. Anyways I didn't say much. Just wrote that I miss him still and will always do. Won't to it again just in case.
Damn:( I miss Gromit
 
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