Unbearable agony

[Harleyyy]

So. I wouldn't be making this but I literally have no supportive people around me. I feel SO. SO. SO. Done and tired. I have been burning for so long. It feels like my mind has been going through so much mental torture. I want to end it but it's not like ending it is easy at all. Wtf are we even here for? Seriously? All people have are problems and shit, the good moments are scarce given they even happen to you. Wtf. I don't wanna do this anymore. I seriously don't. Just people's expectations. Everyone sees what youve done wrong but no one sees your pain. I don't give 2 shits if this happens to everyone IT FUCKIN HURTS. It does. So much. So so much. I can't cry myself to sleep everyday now. A thousand attempts but ofcourse none of them work. Where the fuck do i get these chemicals everyone's talking about. What the fuck. If u fail your life is even more fucked. Fuck this.

 

[Harleyyy]

Wow so no one's going to reply here as well fml lol

 

[Frew]

I'm so sorry for the pain you're in, it sounds absolutely terrible. Do you want to talk more about what's going on in your life? No problem if not

 

[LittleJem]

I just feel pretty similar. I'm sorry you feel this way. The pain is terrible.

Im not in as much pain but I hate being alive. Anything I do, work, walk around. I just hate living with mental illness so much. And I can't say it out loud. Like I can't talk about wanting to die at work. But oh I want it.

 

[awfullife]

I feel you OP...I tend to scream out in rage more than cry anymore...the crying is mostly done. Now it's just the reality of what is bound to come next. Maybe one more set of tears before the event...but my misery cant be shown by tears. It's worse than that.

 

[foxdie]

I feel you @Harleyyy Sorry I just signed in but know you're not alone in feeling this. I've been struggling with thoughts like this for a while now. The world can be to cruel and uncaring. Sending some virtual hugs you're way

 

[fatmanatee]

I feel ya. I wish people would stop hurting me.
I've sunk back into a bad episode, and I've fallen behind at work and had to take the day off today even though I just had 4 days off. I nearly ended it last night.

 

[toseeyousmile]

You really are alone in this world but there are positives and negatives to that and I'm really sorry that you're agonizing so badly over your circumstances I wish I could help more...

 

[_Kaira_]

Wow so no one's going to reply here as well fml lol

I actually personally don't see around 50-60% of threads immediately. I'm so sorry that you felt ignored.


I hear you, and I feel your pain. I get told "Everyone has depression." All the time. Quite frankly, the generalization irritates me beyond belief as well. The invalidation is maddening, especially when you get called attention seeking or whatever else. People don't understand everyone is different, has experienced all their own experiences, and all have their own levels of mental/physical tolerance. Some have had more bad experiences than others, some less. But it shouldn't matter on how much you go through to have the basic human right to self-autonomy.


Your feelings are valid, people who think or say otherwise either can't understand or
don't want to because they themselves would not be able to live a day in our shoes.

Sending love and hugs

 

[Gaybonez]

You really are alone in this world but there are positives and negatives to that and I'm really sorry that you're agonizing so badly over your circumstances I wish I could help more...

Harsh truth right here. You are completely alone while you're alive and in the end. I'm not saying human interaction is not fun for me and maybe for OP. I'm just saying you are alone in your head at the end of the day. Welcome to life.

 

[sanchua]

Well which "chemicals"

 

[Harleyyy]

I actually personally don't see around 50-60% of threads immediately. I'm so sorry that you felt ignored.


I hear you, and I feel your pain. I get told "Everyone has depression." All the time. Quite frankly, the generalization irritates me beyond belief as well. The invalidation is maddening, especially when you get called attention seeking or whatever else. People don't understand everyone is different, has experienced all their own experiences, and all have their own levels of mental/physical tolerance. Some have had more bad experiences than others, some less. But it shouldn't matter on how much you go through to have the basic human right to self-autonomy.


Your feelings are valid, people who think or say otherwise either can't understand or
don't want to because they themselves would not be able to live a day in our shoes.

Sending love and hugs

Thank you. Sending lots of love to you too.

 

[Spitfire]

Wow so no one's going to reply here as well fml lol

Life sucks