Help Trying to find people who knew my brother on this site

[mya_]

Hi there!

I'm pretty new here, and I'm not quite used to the functionalities of this site. Anyway, I'm trying to see if anybody here ever talked with my brother, who recently committed suicide and had a profile here. His username was Daxter_87

I would really appreciate if any of you could tell me if you knew him or how he was here. I'm trying to better understand his decision, even though he talked about it before and I'm in no way judging him or anyone here.

Thank you so much in advance

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I never knew him but if you get up to around 20 posts you can access the search function and look up his username by pressing the gear icon and using the members search option and then from there look through all of his old posts and threads.

 

[derpyderpins]

Sorry for your loss. It looks like he only had 24 public messages, but that doesn't mean he wasn't active in DMs and chat. You may want to ask on the chat page as different people frequent that in my experience.

 

[_AllCatsAreGrey_]

I appreciate your respectful tone. I hope that reflecting on your brother's footprint here gives some perspective and hopefully closure.

As others have said, search functions open after a period of being active. There are some game threads that are easy to increase your activity too, if you don't have the capacity to write.

 

[Placo]

This is a large and active forum and it is easy to forget of the various users, the best known users are obviously those who post the most and your brother had few of them, but perhaps as they pointed out to you he was active in chat or in private messages, for reach the number of posts necessary to search for his messages you could post in the various threads about games if you really don't know what to say.

 

[wyo777]

He never mentioned anything about the method and never posted a goodbye thread. Can i ask you, why you created an account nearly two weeks ago an you asking now? Your brother was active in different part of this forum. But if u ask me personally i think He was very lonely.

 

[mya_]

He never mentioned anything about the method and never posted a goodbye thread. Can i ask you, why you created an account nearly two weeks ago an you asking now? Your brother was active in different part of this forum. But if u ask me personally i think He was very lonely.

Hi, so I created the account a while ago to try and see his profile. But once I got the account, I saw that the profiles are private here and I really didn't know what to do. Just now I've found the strength to try and reach out here with a post, still I don't know much about how the site works.
Did you know him? If you don't mind me asking. He was really private and didn't want to talk much with us about his issues, I guess because he knew it would hurt us.

 

[rozeske]

I'm really sorry for your loss. I can only imagine what you must be feeling. I didn't get to know him and can't say much but I hope you find the closure you are looking for. Thank you for being kind and understanding.

 

[wyo777]

Hi, so I created the account a while ago to try and see his profile. But once I got the account, I saw that the profiles are private here and I really didn't know what to do. Just now I've found the strength to try and reach out here with a post, still I don't know much about how the site works.
Did you know him? If you don't mind me asking. He was really private and didn't want to talk much with us about his issues, I guess because he knew it would hurt us.

I am sorry. I didn't know him. I am sorry for Your lost. All that i can tell you is as above, when you acces a search bar you will be able to read his posts. What i can tell you now... There is no goodbye thread, cause im assuming u looking for that. There is couple posts offtopic, mostly about gaming. Maybe U can find there something what can help You. In my opinion He was silent, nice but lonely. Im really sorry for Your lost.

 

[mya_]

I am sorry. I didn't know him. I am sorry for Your lost. All that i can tell you is as above, when you acces a search bar you will be able to read his posts. What i can tell you now... There is no goodbye thread, cause im assuming u looking for that. There is couple posts offtopic, mostly about gaming. Maybe U can find there something what can help You. In my opinion He was silent, nice but lonely. Im really sorry for Your lost.

Thank you for your words. Yes, I will try to post more often so I can access the search bar and the profile

 

[NumbItAll]

Hi, I'm sorry for your loss. From what I understand he suffered from very debilitating OCD and misophonia and could never find any relief. His posts always stood out to me as very thoughtful, articulate, and interesting. He had militant antinatalist ideals and a very negative outlook on life in general. I think a lack of intimacy and connection with other people was an issue as well.

 

[mya_]

Hi, I'm sorry for your loss. From what I understand he suffered from very debilitating OCD and misophonia and could never find any relief. His posts always stood out to me as very thoughtful, articulate, and interesting. He had militant antinatalist ideals and a very negative outlook on life in general. I think a lack of intimacy and connection with other people was an issue as well.

Thank you for replying! I'm glad you think his posts were interesting, I found his writings very interesting as well (when he felt like sharing them with me). I wish he would have found a connection with us, his family, but we didn't want to pressure him either

 

[feelinggloomy]

I feel for you because I would like to know if my son found this site. It would make me feel like he was not so alone in his life and when he CTB. I don't know what his user name would have been so I have no way to track him. But I sure wish I could. I wish you luck

 

[mya_]

I feel for you because I would like to know if my son found this site. It would make me feel like he was not so alone in his life and when he CTB. I don't know what his user name would have been so I have no way to track him. But I sure wish I could. I wish you luck

Hi! I'm so sorry for your loss. What you say it's the exact same reason why I started searching for him online, to see if he shared his thoughts with people that were not us. I knew that he was here only after his passing, because he left his account open on my mom's phone. I hope you can find closure and peace
Also feel free to reach out if you want to talk

 

[Bed]

im really sorry for your loss. i looked at his profile and he never posted anything on there, i hope that helps a bit.

 

[mya_]

im really sorry for your loss. i looked at his profile and he never posted anything on there, i hope that helps a bit.

Thank you for checking, it's much appreciated I've managed to find some of his posts, so I'm happy that I was able to create this account

 

[NumbItAll]

Hmm are we all talking about the same person @Daxter_87? He had 401 messages

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Welcome to the forum! I've read many of his messages here on the forum. @NumbItAll summed it up very eloquently.

Obviously there was no official GBT from him.

I'm very sorry for your loss.

 

[derpyderpins]

Hmm are we all talking about the same person @Daxter_87? He had 401 messages

oh shit I was looking at Daxter777

 

[feelinggloomy]

Hi! I'm so sorry for your loss. What you say it's the exact same reason why I started searching for him online, to see if he shared his thoughts with people that were not us. I knew that he was here only after his passing, because he left his account open on my mom's phone. I hope you can find closure and peace
Also feel free to reach out if you want to talk

Thanks my son shared a ton with me … but it would be nice to know he was able to reach out to someone that night. I doubt he left any traces on any sites he was pretty careful but he reference people that I had not heard of including a dude in Finland who I who I would love to know who they are. But I likely never will. Again best of luck to you and when you can DM feel free to reach out

 

[mya_]

oh shit I was looking at Daxter777

Understandable, quite similar name hehe

 

[Placo]

I feel for you because I would like to know if my son found this site. It would make me feel like he was not so alone in his life and when he CTB. I don't know what his user name would have been so I have no way to track him. But I sure wish I could. I wish you luck

Excuse my curiosity, but has the fact that your son did CTB made you suicidal too?

 

[feelinggloomy]

Absolutely that's why I plan to CTB when my pups are gone. Absolutely

 

[derpyderpins]

oh shit I was looking at Daxter777

I went through Daxter_87's history and I don't think we ever really interacted. Sorry.

 

[mya_]

I went through Daxter_87's history and I don't think we ever really interacted. Sorry.

Don't worry about it, it means a lot that you tried and searched for him :) thank you!!

 

[Csmith8827]

If it's the same Daxter I'm thinking about he was really upset with the way his parents were treating him and he was trying to order SN using his parents credit card but trying to make it look like he was purchasing something else. If it's the same Daxter. I actually wondered how he was doing today because I hadn't seen his posts in a while. Lemme check to see if it's the same Daxter... Yeah it's the same person. He has 401 messages...if you read them you can see it had to do with the relationship between him and his parents... that's what I remember. In one of his posts or titles it was like "it's unbelievable how a parent can treat there child" or something like that.

 

[CTB Dream]

Dax rly ctb? v sry
v sry, dax rly nice alws rply alws talk me tell nice me rly sad Dax hpn ,,alws care now disapre v nice prsn care me this life rly cruel ppl disapre nice ppl sffr, ya tell me care alws care, say have ocd say sry me alws tell no wry v thank ,rly sad me love game also see Dax think Dax char rly amaze, ya,
, v sad hpn v sry lose dax this forum all lose Dax, dax v nice feel lone me undrstd me say injury damage undrstd how lone ,now sudn disapre ctb all ppl know disapre ctb rly cruel life, me rly hope peace dax but v sad make cry

 

[mya_]

If it's the same Daxter I'm thinking about he was really upset with the way his parents were treating him and he was trying to order SN using his parents credit card but trying to make it look like he was purchasing something else. If it's the same Daxter. I actually wondered how he was doing today because I hadn't seen his posts in a while. Lemme check to see if it's the same Daxter... Yeah it's the same person. He has 401 messages...if you read them you can see it had to do with the relationship between him and his parents... that's what I remember. In one of his posts or titles it was like "it's unbelievable how a parent can treat there child" or something like that.

Thank you for your reply, it's really appreciated. I believe he was mad that he got brought into this world and he didn't agree with our parents having children (us). Thanks for your input

Dax rly ctb? v sry
v sry, dax rly nice alws rply alws talk me tell nice me rly sad Dax hpn ,,alws care now disapre v nice prsn care me this life rly cruel ppl disapre nice ppl sffr, ya tell me care alws care, say have ocd say sry me alws tell no wry v thank ,rly sad me love game also see Dax think Dax char rly amaze, ya,
, v sad hpn v sry lose dax this forum all lose Dax, dax v nice feel lone me undrstd me say injury damage undrstd how lone ,now sudn disapre ctb all ppl know disapre ctb rly cruel life, me rly hope peace dax but v sad make cry

Hi! Thanks for your reply, it makes me somewhat happy that Daxter was nice to you and that you got to know a bit about him. If you ever feel like talking, you can reach out via PM. Hugs for you

 

[NumbItAll]

A lighthearted thread that I remembered while you are still working towards accessing the search feature: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/anyone-else-into-3d-platformers.122032/

 

[DeIetedUser4739]

Did the police investigate his cause of death?