Story Told my mom I'm not a Christian last night

[Lil_Intro_Vert]

On the ride home after soccer practice my mom asked what after school youth group I wanted to go to, and when i told her i didn't want to go to either one she obviously asked why. I was honestly so done with going to church and doing church related things, so i just told her I don't believe anymore. She asked me why and i explained to her how I think hell is a very messed up concept and there's no way Christianity and hell can coexist, and she said, through tears, that she'd "hate for me to find out the hard way." She's very clearly shaken and sad about me not being a christian, and thankfully she's not the kind of person to throw me out of the house, but it still fucking hurts for my own mother to believe I'm going to hell. It also made me think about how if/when i kill myself she'll probably think her son went to hell, and that she failed as a parent. Really makes me mad how there was no hesitation, no second thoughts about how maybe hell can't be real and it's wrong for people to suffer forever, just unchanging belief and blind faith. On the bright side i feel better for being honest and hopefully i don't have to go to church anymore, but on the downside i feel like shit and am even more nervous about my parents finding out I'm depressed as they might blame it on me not being Christian and not having god. I have no idea how my dad will react or if he even knows yet, as he's in America and won't get back until Saturday. Today she hasn't talked about it and seems to be trying to act normally, although she's visibly shook still.

TLDR: My mom thinks I'm going to hell and I'm sad

 

[DeadlyLiving]

Religion is a big fight point for lots of people, because everything founds on believing. There is no proof of hell and there being a god, so either you believe in it or not, but if you choose to believe and are totally convinced about it then you naturally don't like other people opinions if they don't agree with you or "fear for their souls".

Your mother has to understand that her beliefs aren't the only ones that exists. If she doesn't it is her own fault to think you're going to hell. Since religion itself isn't proofable in many aspects, you have to try to explain to try that to her.

 

[Johnnythefox]

Religion is a big fight point for lots of people

I would say that's an understatement, given that it's probably responsible for more deaths and suffering than anything else.

 

[NumbItAll]

I mean it's not your fault she believes in fairy tales, but that's a sad situation. Hopefully things will improve and she'll become more open/understanding. I think it was totally reasonable and fair for you to be honest about it. You are allowed to have an opinion after all.

 

[Lil_Intro_Vert]

@DeadlyLiving if she brings it up again i will, but a lot of christians have sort of fooled themselves into thinking christianity is the only rational answer. Hopefully she's able to at least shift her beliefs so that hell isnt included in the christianity she believes in. Plenty of christians believe in salvation for all, so that would probably be the argument that would work best for her.

 

[Lil_Intro_Vert]

I mean it's not your fault she believes in fairy tales, but that's a sad situation. Hopefully things will improve and she'll become more open/understanding. I think it was totally reasonable and fair for you to be honest about it. You are allowed to have an opinion after all.

Thanks, means a lot when I'm the first in my family to go against tradition