Today is my birthday :(

[FireFox]

I have turned 23 today and i feel like i have wasted my entire life and have nothing to show for it.

I dont feel young anymore and i am under so much pressure to have it all figured out ( i am putting the pressure on myself).

I feel like i should be settled by now in a relationship and have a career and place of my own.

I have nothing to celebrate. I am a loser.
1)Never had a job and have major insecurities because of it. I feel like i am the only 23rd who has never worked
2) I have no idea what career path i want since graduating university

3) never had boyfriend. I was always thought i would be with someome by now
My birthday does not feel me with joy or any happiness. My family brought me a cake which will be cut in the next couple of hours.
I dont want anything
I never thought this would be life.
Everyday the urge to kill myself just grows.

 

[in_the_end]

1) nobody likes to work. that's why they pay you

2) first things first. What did you study?

3) not having a boyfriend at 23 is annoying but not so bad. my first girlfriend was at 24, but the love of my life came at 30. sometimes it's a matter of time, sometimes it's a matter of luck

I don't want to lessen your frustrations, I'm just saying sometimes it just takes a little longer

 

[Tintypographer]

Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!

That's all I can say! Happy birthday!!!

 

[NekoNomNom]

Happy birthday.

 

[_Minsk]

Happy Birthday inTheEnd!!:33
Hope you get a nice cake & some cool gifts!:3

 

[MaybeSoon]

Happy Birthday.

You haven't wasted your entire life, you graduated university, in my opinion that's something to be really proud of.

 

[FireFox]

1) nobody likes to work. that's why they pay you

2) first things first. What did you study?

3) not having a boyfriend at 23 is annoying but not so bad. my first girlfriend was at 24, but the love of my life came at 30. sometimes it's a matter of time, sometimes it's a matter of luck

I don't want to lessen your frustrations, I'm just saying sometimes it just takes a little longer

I messed up my entire life either way
1) I never was encouraged to work due to my sheltered upbringing .I have done voluntary work in the past which didnt go well and ulimatley ruined my confidence and developed a fear of messing up . I used to be confident talking to people but i now i fear messing up . All i want is to hide.

I was offered a part time job(saturday) in a church set up by some during university. I rejected it due to fear of messing up again. I regret it now since
I applied for jobs and get rejected.

I studied an undergraduate degree in law. I was interested in the begining with law but gradually lost interest

In the UK a law degree does not make a lawyer. Qualification is more difficult in the UK as you need to secure a training contract. They are limited places every year.

I feel like this is the end of my life. I ruined my life forever.
I cant fix this

 

[NekoNomNom]

I messed up my entire life either way
1) I have done voluntary work in the past which didnt go well and ulimatley ruined my confidence and developed a fear of messing up .I was offered a part time job(saturday) in a church set up by some during university. I rejected it due to fear of messing up again. I regret it now since
I applied for jobs and get rejected.

I studied an undergraduate degree in law. I was interested in the begining with law but gradually lost interest

In the UK a law degree does not make a lawyer. Qualification is more difficult in the UK as you need to secure a training contract.

I like this is the end of my life. I ruined my life forever

Hey, I spent a ridiculous amount of time getting my Associate's degree in Paralegal Studies. Worked 4 months in the field and hated it. Haven't gone back to that field in over a year.

I feel you.

 

[in_the_end]

I was a volunteer for the red cross and in that place they taught me something.

every time someone made a mistake they said: if I wanted it to go well, I would have paid someone

do volunteer work without fear of being wrong. it is all part of the experience. And if they tell you something, you know you can answer

 

[Deleted member 10475]

I turn 26 this summer and I'm nowhere near where I should be. Just know that you're not alone in how you feel, Happy Birthday.

 

[Aavemainen]

I don't know if it's of any consolation, but know that you're not alone with such feelings, I can relate very much. I wish you a happy birthday regardless

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Happy birthday :)

 

[pete_x]

If this is a bit tonedeaf I do apologize, I really couldn't help it.

 

[breachingthevoid]

This just breaks my heart... First things first. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Next, I want to tell you that you are SO YOUNG still. You aren't supposed to have everything figured out. I'm 40 years old and I don't have everything figured out and I probably never will. That's the way that life is.
1. You are NOT the only 23 year old who has never had a job, that's actually pretty normal these days. My step daughter is in college and she's never had a job. Don't feel insecure, it just means that you have more to look forward to...your possibilities are totally open to you!
2. You just graduated, don't think you need to know exactly what you want to do right now. Just start small. Get out in the world and do something, anything. Do you like animals? Get a job at a pet store or an animal shelter. Or go for an entry level position that pertains to your degree. You can do this!
3. There are PLENTY of 23 year olds who haven't had boyfriends. Have you tried to get yourself out there at all? Try doing something fun like taking a class or joining a local club or something and see what happens. Having a boyfriend is NOT all there is to life, trust me. You can and should stand on your own two feet.

Listen. I just need to tell you that you are a beautiful, amazing human being and you have everything in front of you. Everything you listed as things that give you pain and anxiety are TOTALLY normal. You have SO much to look forward to.

 

[Lostandfound7]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEAUTIFUL!

U don't have to have everything figured out right now..Be easy on yourself..

Sending u a "virtual cake"! MUAH

 

[FireFox]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEAUTIFUL!

U don't have to have everything figured out right now..Be easy on yourself..

Sending u a "virtual cake"! MUAH

Thank you so much

 

[Wanting2go]

Happy birthday!

 

[FireFox]

Hey, I spent a ridiculous amount of time getting my Associate's degree in Paralegal Studies. Worked 4 months in the field and hated it. Haven't gone back to that field in over a year.

I feel you.

What do you do now

This just breaks my heart... First things first. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Next, I want to tell you that you are SO YOUNG still. You aren't supposed to have everything figured out. I'm 40 years old and I don't have everything figured out and I probably never will. That's the way that life is.
1. You are NOT the only 23 year old who has never had a job, that's actually pretty normal these days. My step daughter is in college and she's never had a job. Don't feel insecure, it just means that you have more to look forward to...your possibilities are totally open to you!
2. You just graduated, don't think you need to know exactly what you want to do right now. Just start small. Get out in the world and do something, anything. Do you like animals? Get a job at a pet store or an animal shelter. Or go for an entry level position that pertains to your degree. You can do this!
3. There are PLENTY of 23 year olds who haven't had boyfriends. Have you tried to get yourself out there at all? Try doing something fun like taking a class or joining a local club or something and see what happens. Having a boyfriend is NOT all there is to life, trust me. You can and should stand on your own two feet.

Listen. I just need to tell you that you are a beautiful, amazing human being and you have everything in front of you. Everything you listed as things that give you pain and anxiety are TOTALLY normal. You have SO much to look forward to.

Thank you so much for your wonderful reply
I feel like have fucked it all up . My life. I am 23 and this is my life. I cant stop crying.

I feel like i am never going to get job offer again. Sometimes i feel like that was my last ever job offer and i am never going to have one again.
We live in a world which it is so normalised to work at young age. I read comments online saying " i will never hire a young person who has never worked" etc
With covid 19 there no jobs. Before covid 19 i struggled to find work and get rejected for retail and minimum wage jobs

The longer i am unemployed the less employers will want me that what i fear everyday. The cv hole gets bigger i am terrified

Since graduating i feel.so lost it is absolutey scary.

At university i had a purpose and structure now it is gone i cant cope. I struggle to find a job doesnt help either. No one sees how scared i am.

I hate myself because i plan for things for the first time i have no plan. I am fucking angry at myself for allowing my life to be a mess..i needed to have it perfect after graduating a job offer or something secured, a boyfried and direction.


Nothing brings me joy anymore.
I dont want to see the next 10 years.
I cant do it anymore

 

[FireFox]

This is the worst day ever :(
I am nothing but jobless loser who living this house and this neighbourhood for ever.
I feel so trapped i dont even know what do anymore.
Once i reach 100+ pills i am ending it all.
The pressure is too much all too much

 

[Arisa]

Happy birthday! ♡

My friend met her bf at 28 and married at 30. Now she is so happy! She couldn't hold down a job either but he makes good money. Dont give up!

 

[taylor321]

I have turned 23 today and i feel like i have wasted my entire life and have nothing to show for it.

I dont feel young anymore and i am under so much pressure to have it all figured out ( i am putting the pressure on myself).

I feel like i should be settled by now in a relationship and have a career and place of my own.

I have nothing to celebrate. I am a loser.
1)Never had a job and have major insecurities because of it. I feel like i am the only 23rd who has never worked
2) I have no idea what career path i want since graduating university

3) never had boyfriend. I was always thought i would be with someome by now
My birthday does not feel me with joy or any happiness. My family brought me a cake which will be cut in the next couple of hours.
I dont want anything
I never thought this would be life.
Everyday the urge to kill myself just grows.

I'm so sorry, I hope u find happiness soon. I too also hate my birthdays, Im honestly not sure I will make it to 23 and i don't care. I just want to be at peace yknow? id be gone by now if this guy from the beginning of this year hadnt bailed on me :( I truly hope things get better for u

 

[Aavemainen]

This is the worst day ever :(
I am nothing but jobless loser who living this house and this neighbourhood for ever.
I feel so trapped i dont even know what do anymore.
Once i reach 100+ pills i am ending it all.
The pressure is too much all too much

I'm so sorry you feel like this. I just want you to know we're in the same boat, and if you feel like you want to talk to someone, feel free to message me.

 

[Shero]

Please don't be so hard on yourself.
Happy Birthday.

 

[Iwantoutrightnow]

This is probably not what you want to hear but happy birthday

 

[breachingthevoid]

This is the worst day ever :(
I am nothing but jobless loser who living this house and this neighbourhood for ever.
I feel so trapped i dont even know what do anymore.
Once i reach 100+ pills i am ending it all.
The pressure is too much all too much

I respect your feelings, and I want you to know that you have been heard. I see you...I hear you. You are NOT alone and you are NOT misunderstood, because I understand how absolutely crippling your feelings are. I've been there myself many times, that place where it feels like the dark tunnel never ends, only gets deeper and more constricting until I'm just buried alive and scared to death. The thing is, if you keep crawling forward, the tunnel may widen a bit, you may see some light...

You are not a jobless loser. You are not trapped. You can make choices, and if your choice really is to end it all I respect that 100%, but I just don't want you doing that only because you think "you can't get a job, you won't ever find love, etc.", because those things ARE attainable! I am 40 years old and I was married the first time at 25...it was a terrible mistake and led me through 15 years of abuse and pain, stuff I'm STILL dealing with. Just last year I got engaged after being divorced for 5 years and feeling like I had wasted my entire life. I didn't think I would ever find someone again, not with my baggage, not with what I'd been through, but I did, and it happened in the most unexpected way. I also changed careers about 5 years ago...completely! The business I built doesn't even use my college degree, so theoretically, I didn't really need it. I guess I'm trying to say, you have options.

I know the state of the world right now is crazy and it makes working harder...which is why I would say, don't do anything until after you've given yourself a good chance to find the things you want to find. You're 23? Do me a favor? Set a date for 6 months from now and then write down all of the things that are troubling you right now. When you hit that 6 month mark, see if ANYTHING has gotten better. Just give it a try, if not for you, then for me...someone out in cyberspace who cares about you. Can you give it a try?

 

[Kumachan]

HBD!~

 

[Erdapfel]

I will become 23 this year. I have completed an apprenticeship, I have already worked, but was then dismissed twice due to incapacity to work and now I have been doing nothing other than watching youtube videos for about 2 years. Never had a girlfriend either. I wish you a birthday appropriate to the circumstances.

 

[Golden-Ivory]

Happy birthday wishing you the best hun

 

[Lost_the_will2_live]

Happy Birthday, wishing you some good luck and peace this year!