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BrokenHill

BrokenHill

detached from reality
May 1, 2022
52
It's really awful to not be understood from anyone around me, I can't say anything about ny plans or my pain, if i complain too much about sadness and the meaningless of life there will be suspection about my behaviour and bad consequences will happen, everyone around me is 1000% pro lifers and if i mention one good word about suicide they will stare at me weirdly.

I don't need any encouragement from them to ctb i just want that decision to be respected and need them to understand my reasons to ctb, I can't forever force myself to fake smile and fake happiness behaviour just to avoid abusive emotional hurt if they knew my plan it's not fair i already suffer why they blame us for ctb and telling us to man up and be strong? Why they think we are weak and they are stronger than us?

I can't discuss anyone outside ss even on internet without feeling restricted to express my emotions and being told "you have to find hope, don't give up you need to be strong and believe in yourself, don't do it!" Blah blah blah man we are not kids that can be tricked and doped with that words, talking is much easier than doing it, it's not like you know what our minds and emotions are more than we know ourselves.

I feel so lonely and misunderstood because of prolifers and my family will threat me if they knew that I'm suicidal and psychiatrist will lead me to psych ward if he know, so no help is coming, they are prolifers but they forget that they lead many people to ctb because of them

lonely in the darkness.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,989
I do wish that we lived in a world where suicide is not so stigmatised and our right to die is respected. It is cruel to expect people to suffer for decades against their wishes. I just think that non suicidal people will never be able to understand as they are not suicidal themselves. I always see it as best to keep thoughts of suicide to myself. Pro lifers are so frustrating and toxic positivity and platitudes do not help anything. I'm sorry that you are suffering, I know that loneliness can be painful for many people. I wish you the best in whatever happens.
 
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Pluto

Pluto

Cat Extremist
Dec 27, 2020
5,705
Even elderly people with terminal illness have to cop this to some degree, let alone those of us who have no hope of being empathised with by the general population.

As a whole, our society has never faced the issues, discussions and philosophical positions around death. Our solution is to fear it, dread it, hide it and brush it away as much as possible. In the context of suicide, the message is 'make it go away, quickly, with little effort.' The irony is that our same failed mentality around death has also given rise to the wars and ecological damage that endanger all life needlessly.

In short, one has to accept that the world is a primitive place and humanity, for all its self-congratulatory hubris, has a long way to go to exit the dark ages.
 
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BrokenHill

BrokenHill

detached from reality
May 1, 2022
52
I do wish that we lived in a world where suicide is not so stigmatised and our right to die is respected. It is cruel to expect people to suffer for decades against their wishes. I just think that non suicidal people will never be able to understand as they are not suicidal themselves. I always see it as best to keep thoughts of suicide to myself. Pro lifers are so frustrating and toxic positivity and platitudes do not help anything. I'm sorry that you are suffering, I know that loneliness can be painful for many people. I wish you the best in whatever happens.
I know the feeling i have read your posts too, we are forced to stare at the darkness forever and really toxic positivity is actually a toxic negativity for suicidals, it's not solving anything, thanks for your kind words.
Even elderly people with terminal illness have to cop this to some degree, let alone those of us who have no hope of being empathised with by the general population.

As a whole, our society has never faced the issues, discussions and philosophical positions around death. Our solution is to fear it, dread it, hide it and brush it away as much as possible. In the context of suicide, the message is 'make it go away, quickly, with little effort.' The irony is that our same failed mentality around death has also given rise to the wars and ecological damage that endanger all life needlessly.

In short, one has to accept that the world is a primitive place and humanity, for all its self-congratulatory hubris, has a long way to go to exit the dark ages.
Indeed the world is primitive place and as unpopular opinion the dark ages has not ended yet it only getting worse over time, and hiding suicide and death facts will not solve shit, every truth we hide, a disaster will happen.
 
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