Thomas Rekowicz
Member
- Mar 10, 2025
- 67
So Sanctioned Suicide knowleadge helped me with my first CTB attempt three years ago but i survive it. I was lurking this forum. I used too unstable substance never overdose on caffeine it was nightmare. After i left hospital i had to run from my mother. She abused me and guilty trip me about my attempt. I lost girlfriend i loved very much due to tension my mother bring into my relationship after that i cut any ties to my mother she said she will CTB if i leave her but i did not care anymore and moved out to a small dormitory. My psychiatrist pump me with heavy meds so i can finish my law studies. I defend my masters degree with 4.5 grade against all odds. I wrote about Euthanasia in Polish Penal Code ( thank you all Sanctioned Suicide members for materials i used during writing this work without you i would not wrote such a good work it passed with 5 grade.) Now i am stuck in limbo i am tired of meds and i can't afford theraphy. My father who is alcoholic after divorce made a new family i can only visit him during holidays. My mother go silent after me moving out my father only giving me alimony and not any bigger attention. My sick mother before my attempt start touching me like slapping my ass in a sexual way many times i felt awfull about it and i said it to her each time but she only laugh i had to run from her i am so tired so unworthy of love. Now i will use SN no more half measures. I have friends they will surfer after i CTB but i can't stand IT anymore i suffered all my life i want peace i can't find my place in this world SaSu is my only safe space so Sanctioned Suicide i AM back
