inaminute
Experienced
- Dec 12, 2023
- 215
So I hang about the most on the suicide discussion pages as Ive got my SN and related meds, but I'm also acutely aware that despite the endless imaginings we all have or had about CTB'ing, there's the real threat of the current situation in the world - Israel/Gaza China/Taiwan NATO/Russia, what if in anyway do you prep/plan for when/if the world goes down the WW3/SHTF scenario?
Do you even care? I do - while I'm a complicated bag of wanting to choose my day of death mixed with an acute sense of impending doom, I still get my daily feeding of mainstream media and I get filled with dread for those who can, unlike me, figure out (or try to - if you subtract the screen time we are slaves to these days) life's meaning or purpose.
So I ask; does the current threat of the apocalypse influence or contradict or whatever else, weigh on your mind? In way way?
I watch Canadian Prepper alot on YouTube along with city prepping and come other channels, I'm also an amateur radio user so I get information about the increasing military uses of the ham bands and encrypted transmissions with their frequency listed (I'm not psychotic) when I see people post to various platforms their videos of these increasingly clear radio transmissions.
The US HFGCS (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/High_Frequency_Global_Communications_System) is one such known use of radio that the USAF use to "talk" to air force flights in the air at all times using stratospheric propagation, which is what amateurs use to bounce signals around the world when making contact at lower frequencies (<30mhz) off the upper "F" layer of atmosphere which makes these things possible. Russians use it too as well as other pocsag uses... (Just Search the terms).
I know my mind can lead me to unhealthy places so earlier I proposed on the discussion forum a trial run of low dose sn (1g) as a reality check with my intent to be near a hospital, because I just hate the state of current affairs.... I'm scared I'm driving myself to over worry or if I'm being scientifically rigourous in repeating tests in self others have done, which could lead to me get help that I maybe actually needing Vs killing myself then to not discover by missing out due to ctb that Palestine eventually gets recognised as a state and the world goes back to normal with normal weather patterns and low inflation with the cost of living disappearing fuel getting cheaper and democracy winning with religions realising extremism is the wrong path toward world peace. And to miss out on that cos I played with fire.
Am I alone here?
Do you even care? I do - while I'm a complicated bag of wanting to choose my day of death mixed with an acute sense of impending doom, I still get my daily feeding of mainstream media and I get filled with dread for those who can, unlike me, figure out (or try to - if you subtract the screen time we are slaves to these days) life's meaning or purpose.
So I ask; does the current threat of the apocalypse influence or contradict or whatever else, weigh on your mind? In way way?
I watch Canadian Prepper alot on YouTube along with city prepping and come other channels, I'm also an amateur radio user so I get information about the increasing military uses of the ham bands and encrypted transmissions with their frequency listed (I'm not psychotic) when I see people post to various platforms their videos of these increasingly clear radio transmissions.
The US HFGCS (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/High_Frequency_Global_Communications_System) is one such known use of radio that the USAF use to "talk" to air force flights in the air at all times using stratospheric propagation, which is what amateurs use to bounce signals around the world when making contact at lower frequencies (<30mhz) off the upper "F" layer of atmosphere which makes these things possible. Russians use it too as well as other pocsag uses... (Just Search the terms).
I know my mind can lead me to unhealthy places so earlier I proposed on the discussion forum a trial run of low dose sn (1g) as a reality check with my intent to be near a hospital, because I just hate the state of current affairs.... I'm scared I'm driving myself to over worry or if I'm being scientifically rigourous in repeating tests in self others have done, which could lead to me get help that I maybe actually needing Vs killing myself then to not discover by missing out due to ctb that Palestine eventually gets recognised as a state and the world goes back to normal with normal weather patterns and low inflation with the cost of living disappearing fuel getting cheaper and democracy winning with religions realising extremism is the wrong path toward world peace. And to miss out on that cos I played with fire.
Am I alone here?
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