Venting There's literally no reason for me to keep going. Everyone's gone.

[OffTheBullseye]

I haven't gotten along with my family in years now. My dad had a stroke and he hasn't been fully the same sense. My relationship with my stepmom is just getting worse and more abusive by the day. None of my sisters like me for a reason I couldn't even begin to place.

My boyfriend, the only person I've ever seen a future worth living for, the one person who made me feel like everything would be okay, is gone. Broke up with me out of the blue two weeks ago. Said he was unhappy and didn't love me anymore and absolutely refused to try doing anything to fix our relationship. Said he wants to "be friends" but he's all but avoiding me and obviously doesn't want to be around me that much anymore. I don't know what happened. He said he didn't want to be with anyone else in the world other than me. He said he loved me more than anything. Now he can barely stand to be around me.

And to top it off, the moment he broke up with me, everyone took his side, so to speak. None of them want to hang out with me anymore. None of them invite me to anything or want to do things with me anymore. My best friend here since freshman year started acting randomly curt and rude and finally all but said she didn't want to be friends with me anymore. She's not talking to me, and her room was always the main room we'd all go hang out in. So now I constantly see my friends and my ex-boyfriend all grouped up together, laughing and having a great time, all while I'm just in my room constantly, alone, crying.

I don't know why I'm so easily replaceable. I don't know why it's so hard to love me. I don't know what happened or what changed for everyone to want to drop me all at the same time. It's agonizing and I don't know what to do; my world has been destroyed and I can't do or say anything to anyone because I can't. This feels like a nightmare.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Are you still in school? High school right? Can you make new friends?

 

[OffTheBullseye]

Are you still in school? High school right? Can you make new friends?

I'm in college right now, junior. I have some friends outside of my group, but they're all in other "groups," so to say, and it feels awkward to intrude. I've been friends with these people since my freshman year, have gone on trips out of the state and even out of the country with some of them. It's just very, very hard to imagine my life without this specific group of people since they've been with me and have been a positive force for so long.

 

[dz.bouquet]

Sounds, honestly very depressing.

I always changed and otherwise tailored myself in hopes of finding friendship, or possibly even love. Still, wasn't even successful once.
I've been alone all my life.

I honestly don't know if I even want it all anymore. I'm pretty sensitive and losing my partner and all my contacts at once would absolutely be the final blow to me.

So very sad.
I really wish the best for you.