Venting Therapy

[TAW122]

No, I don't and I've grown to distrust and dislike therapists. At best, they're just paid venting outlets (I could get much more mileage from other sources) but of course, I respect other people who found them useful. For me, it has been useless (and dangerous) for me since it does not solve the problems that I face, serves to re-frame how I perceive things, or gain more intuition or see some insight (oh sure, because if I look at it in a different way or gain insight that I already know, the problem will automatically cure itself! /s). Also, keep in mind that if I say the wrong thing, then lots of awful consequences will result, one of which is being carted off to the psych ward/hospital. Fuck that, they have the power to sick law enforcement and authorities to detain one and this power imbalance is not something that I take kindly to.

The most annoying thing, that I've encountered are the people who kept pushing and insisting that I try therapy or continue to keep trying as if it is some magical, ultimate solution. These are the same people who often ignore circumstances, evidence, and always assume that therapy is right and that I just haven't given it a fair chance, haven't found the right medication, haven't found one that specializes in (insert disorder or problem). They are a fucking joke. It is about them and not about the patient or the patient's interests. It is all a big sham and one big circle jerk of pro-lifer partydom. The conclusion I've come to is that nothing is ever enough, if you tried 10 therapists, they say keep going, try 100, keep going, etc. Oh and if you didn't get better and they're exhausted, they just resort to blaming you for not trying hard enough or not wanting to get 'help'. It's a terrible, sick joke. They don't treat other situations like that, they don't use the same bland, trite logic when it comes to other things, but when it comes to mental health, therapy, and what not, it's just this illogic, inconsistent, ignorant logic that is pervasive in their reasoning.

I just know that if they force my hand, I'll resist them and it may well push me to ctb (especially if I learn that they are threatening my method). Even we have to stand our ground as we are one of the most vulnerable groups of people out there.

 

[Dor]

Why do people like selling themselves out to therapists I know I kind of adamant towards talking to one because I don't like supporting their business off of profiting my misery for the sake getting the insurance money out of me I don't understand why my mother doesn't understand that, damn.

Do any of you folks find therapists useful towards getting rid of suicidal thoughts and what were your experiences like I just don't like therapists I don't have any interest in them.

I think a good therapist is a rare treasure to be found, unless you're so rich money is coming out of your ass, but even then.

 

[Zzzzz]

No I think they've had it harder. A whole generation of people who had to put their lives on the line. Probably made a lot of people depressed. They had no alternative but to fight or surrender. It made them stronger and whatever losses they had in the war freedom had prevailed. That must have been a glorious feeling

I wouldnt call today's society a "free" society, although it's not a dictatorship.

 

[Zzzzz]

When I really think about this it disturbs me. It seems the only reason society cares about suicidal people Is because THEY FEEL GUILTY and they want to pat themselves on the back and say, "look at us, we did what we could, it's not OUR fault these people died. " The guy who jumped off the GGB said that he was walking to the bridge with tears in his eyes hoping one person would ask him if he is okay, and he would not have jumped. But Nobody said anything to him. There is something disappointing about the fact that a suicidal person has to pay money to be heard or "cared " for and when It's Truly life or death situation nobody cares. We see the same thing happen with homeless people, many of whom have a mental illness. They are abandoned by society. The way people who have mental illness are treated is disgraceful and borderline abusive.

 

[Jen Erik]

I have absolutely no one to talk to about my problems that listens without providing nauseating advice or judgements.

My therapist isn't perfect – I've griped about her a number of times on here because she can really project her own bullshit onto me sometimes – but in the grand scheme of things, she's helped me become more at peace with myself and my decision to ctb. She knows I want to ctb, it's discussed frequently. She's not one of those "I won't treat suicidal people because they're a liability" people.

That being said, I don't pay a direct cost for therapy, and I might be more inclined to insist on higher quality care – specifically her keeping her own drama out of the room – if I was footing the bill myself out of pocket. Medicare pays 80% (as it does with any other medical care I receive) and my supplementary insurance (about $350/month) picks up the rest. But, let's be real: if I had to foot the bill, I wouldn't be in therapy; I am too poor.

 

[CuriousAboutThis]

Personally I am not a fan of therapists because I know it is nothing but a feel good placebo.

 

[Ch92921]

also therapist do commit suicide. I also know about a teacher who told us why commiting suicide was bad and why life is great. As far I know he had committed suicide, too.

 

[21Neberg]

Why do people like selling themselves out to therapists I know I kind of adamant towards talking to one because I don't like supporting their business off of profiting my misery for the sake getting the insurance money out of me I don't understand why my mother doesn't understand that, damn.

Do any of you folks find therapists useful towards getting rid of suicidal thoughts and what were your experiences like I just don't like therapists I don't have any interest in them.

I had a therapist four years ago. It kept me on the right track for a while, but at the end of it all I'm still suicidal.

 

[Titania]

You will find bad and good therapists anywhere. It takes time to find one that suits your needs. I did happen to find one that I felt getting progress from and it felt good talking about my issues including my suicidal thoughts. No one wants to hear about suicide sadly. But unfortunately, I could no longer afford him because most was coming from my own pocket and my insurance wasn't paying much of it. I'm on a free government insurance so maybe it'll help? I haven't tried it out much yet or had the motivation to look around. If you do want to find a good one that suits you well, I wish you good luck.

 

[Anima]

Why do people like selling themselves out to therapists I know I kind of adamant towards talking to one because I don't like supporting their business off of profiting my misery for the sake getting the insurance money out of me I don't understand why my mother doesn't understand that, damn.

Do any of you folks find therapists useful towards getting rid of suicidal thoughts and what were your experiences like I just don't like therapists I don't have any interest in them.

That's how I feel too. I think the whole system is one big money-making scheme. They are in work because of people with all sorts of problems seeking out help hoping to find a solution to whatever is going wrong in their lives. I know that it is helpful for a lot of people and mind you there are some who are good at what they are doing and who actually do care wirhing rhe boundaries of their jobs.

Suicide is a taboo with most therapist, but some don't care enough to say anything others simply are liberal believing that it is ultimatively up to the very person considering it.

 

[Othermind]

I hate the "therapy at all costs" mentality that most people seem to share rather than therapists or the concept of therapy itself.
Basically because it dismisses everyone with suicidal thoughts as "mentally ill" ( an arbitrary label that political power assigns to those who do not conform to the standard that make them useful to society, but let's not go down that rabbit hole) and with that hand waves away the very notion that people might have legitimate reasons for wanting to end their lives.
I also dislike how everyone thinks (maybe trying to reassure themselves, I don't know) that it's always a silver bullet solution to a person's problems when there are circumstances in which it quite clearly isn't. For instance if I'm depressed because I'm stuck in a poverty loop or I'm discriminated against where I live, therapy is not going to change anything about my material conditions which are ultimately the cause of my illness.
That said, in a lot of cases people do benefit from it, so I see no reason to completely demonize it either.

 

[CuriousAboutThis]

I'm probably too stubborn to talk to therapists, not to demonize them, I just don't value therapy in general because it is not within my interests and that also leads to conflict of interests plus it is within other people's interests it feels like it is being forced on me by people that care or don't care so it must be a catch 22 thing.

 

[jumprope]

I think some depressions are incurable. I think some are. I think everyone with depression is scared its incurable because you just don't know. I know I have a chance to get better but it doesn't take away from the fact that every day I'm shit scared that I won't no matter how hard I try

I think you're right about it being curable for some and incurable for others. I also think this scares psychiatrists and therapists, the idea that no matter what they say or do some of their patients will just Never Get Better, and so they will never, ever admit it to patients. That's when you get a lot of cliches and cheesy therapy talk.

 

[Moony21]

Therapy has never helped me over the years. Before Christmas, After a long time, I had a therapy session with the psychiatrist ( I usally met only the delegated psychologist)... I wanted to discuss with him my medication and why I feel sick all the time and every day. He asked me if he may could discuss it with the medical department of the hospital. I was surprised that he took me seriously. He said that my nausea could be caused by a possible hormone disorder. (since I have no thyroid, it could be. ) Yesterday I got a squad from the endocrinologist. that would improve my quality of life if they can help me, not feeling sick. at least for the next time...

 

[Broken]

I think you're right about it being curable for some and incurable for others. I also think this scares psychiatrists and therapists, the idea that no matter what they say or do some of their patients will just Never Get Better, and so they will never, ever admit it to patients. That's when you get a lot of cliches and cheesy therapy talk.

The other thing that scares me is that i had mild depression for 15 years and didn't really realise. It took over so slowly that I didn't realise. I was able to socialise and would never of thought I was depressed. Canabbis hid it as well. Up until half way through last year my depression was definitley curable. I just had to live the life I wanted and not smoke weed. I had everything I wanted, someone that loved and cared about me and wanted me to be drug free as much as I wanted it. Let myself and her down and she left. Now I'm massivley depressed. Not sure how you getover throwing away love and happiness? I think I'm going to have to live with that feeling until/if I'm lucky enough to be love and get to love again.

 

[Broken]

The other thing that scares me is that i had mild depression for 15 years and didn't really realise. It took over so slowly that I didn't realise. I was able to socialise and would never of thought I was depressed. To someone looking at me you would of thought I was just abit nervous. Intimidated by social situations. The other symptom I had which I only realised now is that I didn't care about keeping my room clean. I had pride in all areas of my life like work and appearance when out but when I got home I lived in a shithole room. Canabbis hid it as well. Up until half way through last year my depression was definitley curable. I just had to live the life I wanted and not smoke weed. I had everything I wanted, someone that loved and cared about me and wanted me to be drug free as much as I wanted it. I grew so much and became such a better person in so many aspects apart from committing to stopping smoking weed. Let myself and her down and she left. Now I'm massivley depressed and it's crazy because weed kept me depressed and I was so close to 'making something of my life with' Not sure how you getover throwing away love and happiness? I think I'm going to have to live with that feeling until/if I'm lucky enough to be give love and be loved again. I really hope I get an oppurtunity at love again because I can't imagine living the rest of my life feeling at such a loss.

 

[LastDay]

I think everyone in this thread has made valid points. There's pros and cons to everything and things have a gray area. My thoughts are overall I think it can be helpful and people can heal and live fulfilling lives but not every single person. There's also a huge amount of factors that determine successful recovery and as we also know success isn't a straight line, there can be relapses. Some factors being how good the therapist is and your connection to them, quality of care, person's quality of life, being able to afford and have accessibility to care, how much the person wants to or doesn't want to change, how bad ailments are and how long a person has been suffering, and how good the person's support system is. And even if all the things are in place all it takes is a moment of weakness and it's all over.

 

[Redt2go]

I think everyone in this thread has made valid points. There's pros and cons to everything and things have a gray area. My thoughts are overall I think it can be helpful and people can heal and live fulfilling lives but not every single person. There's also a huge amount of factors that determine successful recovery and as we also know success isn't a straight line, there can be relapses. Some factors being how good the therapist is and your connection to them, quality of care, person's quality of life, being able to afford and have accessibility to care, how much the person wants to or doesn't want to change, how bad ailments are and how long a person has been suffering, and how good the person's support system is. And even if all the things are in place all it takes is a moment of weakness and it's all over.

I agree with what you said I just don't know if suicide occurs in weakness... In weakness I can't do anything. Suicide takes ashitload of courage

 

[Anima]

I agree with what you said I just don't know if suicide occurs in weakness... In weakness I can't do anything. Suicide takes ashitload of courage

I think @LastDay meant it more in the way of giving into suicide when things get worse, when stability is once again shattered. When everything sinply gets too much. But correct me if Im wrong.

@Redt2go agreed, it does take a whole lot of courage. It's shockingly amazing what desperation can do to us.

 

[LastDay]

I think @LastDay meant it more in the way of giving into suicide when things get worse, when stability is once again shattered. When everything sinply gets too much. But correct me if Im wrong.

@Redt2go agreed, it does take a whole lot of courage. It's shockingly amazing what desperation can do to us.

Yes thank you, that is what I meant. In Dialectical Behavioral Therapy this is called Emotion Mind. It is when an emotional state controls your thinking and behavior. Acting the way you feel is how emotion mind behaves. Emotion mind can flood your system with energy in anger or zap your energy in depression.

 

[ForestLove]

After several sessions with my Psychologist, I dropped her like a potato because she was knowing too much and I was feeling suicidal. I didnt want her to feel guilty if I were to attempt/commit suicide.

She was also kinda insenstive in her remarks.
I thought she could at least relate or be more empathic since we are both women. She wasn't in my shoes and did not know how I truly feel.
At the start of each session, she would ask whether I was (still) feeling suicidal. I replied "Yes, every second of it" and she felt absurd and thinking "are you sure?" No one believes I am suicidal and severely depressed.

On our 2nd session, she told me that "everything will be fine in the end." Sadly, it only gets worse from then..because my problem is not temporary. No amount of therapy or meds will heal my pain.

 

[Worsethangarbage]

I don't think previous generation had it easier or harder. It's just a different obstacle now vs then. Then was the time of disease/wars/rape/violence/industries built on exploiting nature and now it's social-isolation/globalization/being a cog/high expectations/more information to process/industries built on exploiting people. Both environment were different and set a different mindset in kids from the birth. I bet your typical now teenager wouldn't be able to live without internet or social media. The whole social media mentality is sickening because it presses the need for people to make others like them. The environment now wants us to settle down to suit the system than system changing to suit ourselves.

 

[511115]

After several sessions with my Psychologist, I dropped her like a potato because she was knowing too much and I was feeling suicidal. I didnt want her to feel guilty if I were to attempt/commit suicide.

She was also kinda insenstive in her remarks.
I thought she could at least relate or be more empathic since we are both women. She wasn't in my shoes and did not know how I truly feel.
At the start of each session, she would ask whether I was (still) feeling suicidal. I replied "Yes, every second of it" and she felt absurd and thinking "are you sure?" No one believes I am suicidal and severely depressed.

On our 2nd session, she told me that "everything will be fine in the end." Sadly, it only gets worse from then..because my problem is not temporary. No amount of therapy or meds will heal my pain.

I think that's honestly one of my motivators. I never admit to having active suicidal thoughts or plans, because fuck getting committed. But when questioned if suicidal thoughts are present, I answer honestly that they're always there.

There is never any concern. As long as I lie that I am not planning to kill myself, they're satisfied. They don't give a shit that every second of every day, I'm wishing for my own death. So long as I don't say anything that makes them liable, my quality of life doesn't matter one bit.

I guess that's what it boils down to for me, for therapy. If you're honest you get locked up. If you lie, everybody's happy about it. So what's the point? Attend appointments weekly to lie your ass off and make everyone around you satisfied...?

I attended my last session earlier this week. I was totally honest about how life felt like an endless chore. I wanted out. I wanted nothing to do with life, I wanted nothing from life. I had no reason to live. But of course I was not thinking about suicide!!! Lololol!!!!

My session ended with my therapist asking what was going on with my insurance, bc apparently they dropped me. I said I'd look into it. She said she wasn't worried. I smiled real big and said I wasn't either. Cuz I knew I'd be dead before our next session anyway.

When I left she said she'd see me next week and I nodded and smiled.

I'm curious to know whether she'll actually be surprised or not. I got her a parting gift, to be given postmortem. I'm curious also to know if she'll accept or not, because I think it's poor taste to reject a gift from a dead person. Not that I would care, I just think it'd be shitty to give my parents back something they can't do anything with (it's personalized).

 

[Othermind]

I think that's honestly one of my motivators. I never admit to having active suicidal thoughts or plans, because fuck getting committed. But when questioned if suicidal thoughts are present, I answer honestly that they're always there.

There is never any concern. As long as I lie that I am not planning to kill myself, they're satisfied. They don't give a shit that every second of every day, I'm wishing for my own death. So long as I don't say anything that makes them liable, my quality of life doesn't matter one bit.

I guess that's what it boils down to for me, for therapy. If you're honest you get locked up. If you lie, everybody's happy about it. So what's the point? Attend appointments weekly to lie your ass off and make everyone around you satisfied...?

I attended my last session earlier this week. I was totally honest about how life felt like an endless chore. I wanted out. I wanted nothing to do with life, I wanted nothing from life. I had no reason to live. But of course I was not thinking about suicide!!! Lololol!!!!

My session ended with my therapist asking what was going on with my insurance, bc apparently they dropped me. I said I'd look into it. She said she wasn't worried. I smiled real big and said I wasn't either. Cuz I knew I'd be dead before our next session anyway.

When I left she said she'd see me next week and I nodded and smiled.

I'm curious to know whether she'll actually be surprised or not. I got her a parting gift, to be given postmortem. I'm curious also to know if she'll accept or not, because I think it's poor taste to reject a gift from a dead person. Not that I would care, I just think it'd be shitty to give my parents back something they can't do anything with (it's personalized).

Are you sure they would lock you up if you admitted you were planning to kill yourself?
'Cause I told my former therapist of my failed attempt just a few hours after and he didn't even bring up hospitalization, and he had known I was suicidal for a while. He was actually quite understanding.
But the law might work differently where you live so I don't know.

 

[jumprope]

Are you sure they would lock you up if you admitted you were planning to kill yourself?
'Cause I told my former therapist of my failed attempt just a few hours after and he didn't even bring up hospitalization, and he had known I was suicidal for a while. He was actually quite understanding.
But the law might work differently where you live so I don't know.

In most states, you're only hospitalized if you actually have a *plan* to commit suicide. Just feeling generally suicidal isn't enough to get put into inpatient, usually either voluntarily or involuntarily. Sometimes it's as far as having to have a plan and have started collecting the items needed.

It's actually pretty hard to get put in an inpatient program, if only because there are far more patients needing that level of care then there are actual beds.

 

[511115]

I'm considered a very high risk for completion of suicide. I can't even breathe a word about self harm without fear of hospitalization.

That's why I've been on such miserable good behavior for over a year.

I've finally earned everyone's trust back so I can have some time alone to kill myself.

 

[SelfishMom]

I actually really like my current therapist. He's the best I've had. I've straight up told him I am suicidal and think very seriously about different methods and he doesn't get bothered at all. Quite honestly I think he'd fit in here, not that I'd ever let him know about this place.