breatheout
What was my matter before?
- Dec 17, 2023
- 45
hi im just yelling into an echo chamber where i wont be judged but i havent posted in months. i briefly became an alcoholic, went sober, and now going sober from all substances since im harshly declining in life quality. im straight loosing it with all my university work, i want to die so bad, but i cant. i cant die during the holidays, then my best friends birthday is too soon. im too fucking broke to get diagnosed with anything so i was basically self medicating and now im flat dry of money which really sucks. my parents pay for my university and i live at home but i dont even have a job. im literally a fucking mess now, i got a cold which is making everything so much worse my head feels light and ive been in and out of derealization all day. not killing myself yet though. i just needed somewhere to rant so sos so bad becaudse im actually loosing my mind i think. as long as im breaything im alive and its all real its so real
