The moment i’m conscious after waking up i want to die

[Cya89]

Anyone else get this? I feel like it's a sign I should get it over and done with soon

 

[Jack]

i usually wake up upset that im in my garbage body living my garbage life no longer in dream realm

 

[Mr2005]

Anyone else get this? I feel like it's a sign I should get it over and done with soon

Yep. Every single time. Not getting surgeons numbers in 2004 is the first thing I think when I wake up and the last thing I think before going to bed. It'll be the death of me

 

[Retched]

Anyone else get this? I feel like it's a sign I should get it over and done with soon

Yes. And it continues throughout the day.

 

[millefeui]

The only time I have some semblance of peace is when I am asleep. Waking up always makes me feel like crap.

 

[Lra888]

Anyone else get this? I feel like it's a sign I should get it over and done with soon

Yes I definitely feel this every time I wake up. Reality hits me and my heart sinks & stomach tightens. I do not want to be alive or push myself through another day. My reality is that fucking horrible. Hurts more when the dream I'm having is pleasant and waking up destroys that temporary escape.

 

[Mr2005]

Yes. And it continues throughout the day.

Forgot to mention that bit. All I think of inbetween too

 

[Lra888]

Forgot to mention that bit. All I think of inbetween too

It doesn't go away til I fall back to sleep. Never ending cycle.

 

[AndyCurious]

It doesn't go away til I fall back to sleep. Never ending cycle.

Would be nice to sleep forever..

 

[Mr2005]

Is there anything as specific as my example that haunts anyone else? It's almost PTSD

 

[millefeui]

Would be nice to sleep forever..

It is all I can ask for, really. I am so fucking terrified of having to live another life or some afterlife thingy. Pardon the crude language, but I really wanted to put emphasis on how much that scares me.

An eternal sleep, without dreams or anything like that... Pure nothingness. That would be good.

 

[AndyCurious]

It is all I can ask for, really. I am so fucking terrified of having to live another life or some afterlife thingy. Pardon the crude language, but I really wanted to put emphasis on how much that scares me.

An eternal sleep, without dreams or anything like that... Pure nothingness. That would be good.

That is so true...

 

[Retched]

Is there anything as specific as my example that haunts anyone else? It's almost PTSD

I have a few. I can relate at least.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

I hate that too I soon will try and practice lucid dreaming and see if I can master that both so I have a new project or passion in life and also because it would be so amazing being able to do whatever I wish I could in real life but just in a dream world.

 

[Jai]

Anyone else get this? I feel like it's a sign I should get it over and done with soon

The second I see the ceiling

 

[Lra888]

I hate that too I soon will try and practice lucid dreaming and see if I can master that both so I have a new project or passion in life and also because it would be so amazing being able to do whatever I wish I could in real life but just in a dream world.

Would be amazing if after death is something like a lucid dream - maybe not but I can hope.

 

[millefeui]

Would be amazing if after death is something like a lucid dream - maybe not but I can hope.

What if it is a lucid nightmare instead? That is the kind of thought that scare me. Something good could come, but when I look at our reality, where most things are bad, it seems so unlikely. Maybe I just lack faith.

 

[Mr2005]

People who do it claim to know but I don't think anyone really knows unless they're dead.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Would be amazing if after death is something like a lucid dream - maybe not but I can hope.

I am an extreme atheist so I don´t believe in anything "after death" other than we stop existing but it would be amazing though and it would be a good explanation of heaven because you could picture any world you like it could be a rich life of just partying, drugs, girls or it could be to live a normal life with your family and kids like no one has never died.

 

[Retched]

It is all I can ask for, really. I am so fucking terrified of having to live another life or some afterlife thingy. Pardon the crude language, but I really wanted to put emphasis on how much that scares me.

An eternal sleep, without dreams or anything like that... Pure nothingness. That would be good.

I used to believe in reincarnation but now, I'm terrified of it. I'm just done. And if you read up on some of the beliefs, they say you come right back to have another wretched life if you die by suicide. :/

 

[Mr2005]

If it's to do it again as myself until I get it right that's fine by me. Everyone needs a second chance

 

[Lra888]

I am an extreme atheist so I don´t believe in anything "after death" other than we stop existing but it would be amazing though and it would be a good explanation of heaven because you could picture any world you like it could be a rich life of just partying, drugs, girls or it could be to live a normal life with your family and kids like no one has never died.

I don't believe in the depiction of afterlife or god of any religion but things are far too patterned, organized, geometrical, mathematical for it all to just be a random accident. Maybe the consciousness is just temporarily trapped in this meat inside this world. Chemicals in brain affect outlook etc so perhaps what leaves body is just pure self awareness with none of the baggage of this existence. Just exploring thoughts but who knows.

 

[Mr2005]

I am an extreme atheist so I don´t believe in anything "after death" other than we stop existing but it would be amazing though and it would be a good explanation of heaven because you could picture any world you like it could be a rich life of just partying, drugs, girls or it could be to live a normal life with your family and kids like no one has never died.

Lucid dreaming and atheism don't seem to fit. You're not thinking of it as some spiritual realm then? Purely scientific, all in your head

 

[musicismylife]

Having a drink and thinking about doing it tonight, not sure if lighting up the charcoals at 10pm here would sound any alarm though....

It would be nice to go with sleeping pills though...

As for the topic, I'm sort of in a spiral where I wake up and have pretty much nothing to think about or do, no creative inspiration, nothing... and I 've been like this for a considerable amount of time now.. I think after we are dead we are dead, all the subconscious conceptions that we make in life through our experiences are gone at that very moment, so the 'I' that we know of no longer exists

But as everything in nature is transformed there is just no way of telling exactly what happens since we have many thousands of years of history and no one was able to solve that dilema... My best guess is we just fall asleep unconscious and then nature probably takes advantage of anything that could possibly be left of our individual awareness...

 

[Pastdue]

Yes I know exactly what you mean. When I wake up my first thought is 'please not this place again, anything but this place again'.

There was a book I read once called 'word bearers the omnibus' and at the end there was a little short excerpt called 'torment' about a warrior who had this limbs amputated to be put into a metal machine to live forever as punishment. The story was about him being 'woken up' from his alternate reality to fight for them and how when he realised where he was again 'that sound again, the dull sound of metal on stone' and the horror of becoming concious again.

I have a simular horror when I wake up and realise where I am, except I still have all my limbs, it's only my insides that are threatening to fall out. I especially don't enjoy it when I get pain in my abdomen and wonder which way things are shifting around down there.

What I find unfair is that today I read about a 17 year old girl on drugs, taking selfies who fell asleep at the wheel taking drugs and annihilated herself while she was unconcious. Why can't that happen to me?

 

[starcrossedfate]

I feel like a living spectre, just roaming the Earth wailing for freedom from the mortal coil. It's beyond madness.

 

[Lunar]

An eternal sleep, without dreams or anything like that... Pure nothingness. That would be good.

That's how my sleep is because I don't remember any of my dreams anymore. It's just nothingness until I wake up and my head is screaming at me again. It feels horrible because it's like getting a taste of peace, but then having it snatched away. Maybe I'm lucky I even get that though. I don't know. It just doesn't feel that way.

 

[Mr2005]

You can't remember it being nothingness either so if that's what it was it can't be that bad which is good

 

[musicismylife]

That's how my sleep is because I don't remember any of my dreams anymore. It's just nothingness until I wake up and my head is screaming at me again. It feels horrible because it's like getting a taste of peace, but then having it snatched away. Maybe I'm lucky I even get that though. I don't know. It just doesn't feel that way.

and the sleep goes so fast you can barely taste it

 

[Mr2005]

Yes I know exactly what you mean. When I wake up my first thought is 'please not this place again, anything but this place again'.

There was a book I read once called 'word bearers the omnibus' and at the end there was a little short excerpt called 'torment' about a warrior who had this limbs amputated to be put into a metal machine to live forever as punishment. The story was about him being 'woken up' from his alternate reality to fight for them and how when he realised where he was again 'that sound again, the dull sound of metal on stone' and the horror of becoming concious again.

I have a simular horror when I wake up and realise where I am, except I still have all my limbs, it's only my insides that are threatening to fall out. I especially don't enjoy it when I get pain in my abdomen and wonder which way things are shifting around down there.

What I find unfair is that today I read about a 17 year old girl on drugs, taking selfies who fell asleep at the wheel taking drugs and annihilated herself while she was unconcious. Why can't that happen to me?

What I find unfair is that there's 17 year old girls and they have the means to access the internet in the palm of their hands but that 's unfair on them and that's why I 'm an arsehole and why I must die