T

TheLastStraw

Member
May 10, 2018
55
I 100% plan to kill myself once my parents pass away, I might continue living for a few years after until I am tired of working

I can't do it to my father, he is completely blind and he relies on me too much

I'll probably have some money saved once I retire, so I can just roam around the United States for 6-12 months...once my money is depleted I will go deep into the forest and shoot myself in the head

I don't have a college education and have been working low pay labor jobs my entire life and I don't see things changing

My life isn't insufferable some times I go weeks being happy and not thinking about suicide, but ultimately I am not happy with how my life has played out or the situation I'm stuck in, the world is a barbaric cruel place and I want to end things on my own terms instead of playing the waiting game, wondering when and how I would die naturally

Until then I try to enjoy video games and buy a few nice toys, I keep the plan in the back of my head and focus on enjoying and being grateful for the few things I can
 
  • Like
Reactions: Anon1337, millefeui, throwaway777 and 22 others
TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,813
That sounds like a good plan, and I'm glad that you have decided to stay for your family for the time being. Also, in regards to retirement, I'm not fully sure about this, but I have heard that in our generation (I'm almost 30), we may not even have retirement benefits in the coming decade(s) (e.g. Social Security running out of money and people just have to live on their own dime) and that people would just work until they die. If that is the case, then yes, suicide is a much better option rather than facing homelessness, poverty, and also dying of other causes. It takes tremendous courage to be able to die under one's own terms.
 
  • Like
Reactions: NoDream, Jen Erik, Lizzie S. and 3 others
Midnight

Midnight

Beyond solace
Jun 30, 2018
624
I like the idea of suicide being retirement ... Although i'm not planning to actually wait till 65 .. more like in the next year like it's going now. I told the bank to scratch my pension saving plan a while ago. I'll leave what i saved for the funeral. I've been slowly selling everything i don't need anymore for extra cash to spend.. dead people don't need money anyway. Only thing i consider is leaving enough for my family to cover the expenses followed by my death.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: worldexploder and Jen Erik
F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
This is my retirement plan :'( I'm scared of going through with it but I don't think I can afford to exist in society in any acceptable way.
 
  • Like
Reactions: NoDream, lv-gras and Jen Erik
D

Dean

Member
Sep 10, 2018
48
Honestly I think it's a very smart idea to commit suicide as opposed to retiring. People save their whole life for their retirement aka once they are 60, confined to a nursing home, and developing dementia. I say enjoy your money and time while you are young and able. You don't know if you'll save your whole life for retirement and then die suddenly the day before you retire. Trust me I've volunteered with a lot of old people and their number one regret overall was wasting their time working.
 
  • Like
Reactions: millefeui, Candour, NoDream and 7 others
C

Circles

Visionary
Sep 3, 2018
2,297
That sounds like a good plan, and I'm glad that you have decided to stay for your family for the time being. Also, in regards to retirement, I'm not fully sure about this, but I have heard that in our generation (I'm almost 30), we may not even have retirement benefits in the coming decade(s) (e.g. Social Security running out of money and people just have to live on their own dime) and that people would just work until they die. If that is the case, then yes, suicide is a much better option rather than facing homelessness, poverty, and also dying of other causes. It takes tremendous courage to be able to die under one's own terms.
So true. Our generation is fucked if things don't take a sharp turn towards some progress but I highly doubt it. The whole game of life is rigged against us. We all work our lives away trying to build a foundation where we could not only survive but to thrive only to have it taken from us at anytime. Society needs to accept the cold hard fact that not everyone wants to participate in this shit, to any extent. It's a joke to expect someone especially past 60+ years of age to keep working a full time job. Modern society is sick, twisted and down right awful especially for the people who gets the shit end of the stick.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, betteroffdead, GoingSoonish and 4 others
G

GeorgeEastman

Arcanist
Sep 3, 2018
470
some times I go weeks being happy and not thinking about suicide

It always comes back though, doesn't it?

All the times I thought it was gone for good. Now here it is back to stay. I just feel pressure now to die soon. Life is declining. There's no hope of ever being normal, and I know it for sure now. When I was younger, there was still a chance. Now there isn't.

Then I read about cancer patients losing control and depending on others at the end. I will not stand for that, so one way or another I'm going to have to take myself out.
 
  • Like
Reactions: lv-gras, Jen Erik, Delaying and 3 others
S

Schopenhauer

Enlightened
Oct 3, 2018
1,133
Retirement as an euphemism for suicide. Good one.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Duqu, BaconCheeseburger, lv-gras and 3 others
Maravillosa

Maravillosa

Господи помилуй — мир в Україні!
Sep 7, 2018
689
I am 80-90% sure that I will ctb after my mother dies. She is 78 years old, bedridden due to several falls that left her with a hairline fracture in her spine, incontinent and losing her short-term memory. If I were to ctb while she is alive, it would devastate her and force her to live in a convalescent home (she has spent a few weeks in one and hated it). My brother thinks that my ctb (even after Mom dies) would be selfish, that I should live and deal with stress instead of escaping it.

Look, I am on SSI and can only have $2000 in savings. I also am on several waiting lists for Section 8 housing, but who knows when I will get to the top of a waiting list and get my own apartment? I don't want to be homeless after Mom dies.

I agree with the OP here:

My life isn't insufferable some times I go weeks being happy and not thinking about suicide, but ultimately I am not happy with how my life has played out or the situation I'm stuck in, the world is a barbaric cruel place and I want to end things on my own terms instead of playing the waiting game, wondering when and how I would die naturally

In many respects, I am fairly happy, but I do not like the way my life has played out. I should have finished grad school, earned my two concurrent master's degrees (in Latin American Studies and Library and Information Studies) and gotten a tolerable job as a librarian or archivist that would allow me plenty of time for me to write fiction and volunteer at church. Instead, I was forced to leave grad school because suicidal depression made it impossible for me to focus on my studies. If I had managed to finish grad school, I think I might still have ctb ultimately, but I don't think that I would have the wolf at the door so much.
 
  • Like
Reactions: jeffleesb, lv-gras, Jen Erik and 2 others
X

xonnia

Member
Sep 23, 2018
26
totally agree if i live that long ....
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jen Erik
BaconCheeseburger

BaconCheeseburger

Comfort-eating
Aug 4, 2018
693
My dad keeps encouraging me to adjust things in my pension scheme, as it will all 'benefit' me in the end...

...I'm 24. Living to retirement age (which is probably gonna keep rising long before that point) is the last thing I want :(
 
  • Like
Reactions: lv-gras, Schopenhauer and Delaying
R

Roph

Specialist
Sep 24, 2018
355
Look, I am on SSI and can only have $2000 in savings. I also am on several waiting lists for Section 8 housing, but who knows when I will get to the top of a waiting list and get my own apartment? I don't want to be homeless after Mom dies.
It took me about six months for my name to be called. But it can be a lot longer in some places.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Maravillosa and lv-gras
sadak_the_wanderer

sadak_the_wanderer

An appropriate painting
Mar 19, 2018
245
"My retirement" is the euphemism I frequently use when thinking about my plan. It's true, I will be retiring from everything, earlier than others have anticipated, and more completely, but it is quite similar.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Maravillosa, Schopenhauer and lv-gras
Duqu

Duqu

Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!
Aug 27, 2018
452
I plan to "retire" before anyone in my family dies because I can't deal with that crap. Seriously. And they'll be sad I died and all but they'll be over it fast.

ETA my parents are only in their mid-fifties and grandparents in their seventies so other than the grandfather just dxed with cancer I think I got time)
 
  • Like
Reactions: Schopenhauer and lv-gras
M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,034
I think it is pretty cool that some of you are willing to stay around for your old folks. My relationship with my mother is really not the greatest, and I might as well not have a father, so it is hard for me to justify doing the same. The best I can do is stay around for my doggie.

As for retirement, it is something I used to worry about before I was 100% set on killing myself. After all, I dropped out from college, I don't work and I am not particularly great at anything. The good thing about being sure you won't be around for that long is that you stop worrying about stuff like that (on the other hand, you start worrying about other stuff... if you are like me, anyways).
 
  • Like
Reactions: Schopenhauer and lv-gras
Duqu

Duqu

Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!
Aug 27, 2018
452
I think it is pretty cool that some of you are willing to stay around for your old folks. My relationship with my mother is really not the greatest, and I might as well not have a father, so it is hard for me to justify doing the same. The best I can do is stay around for my doggie.

I'm basically sticking around until my cat dies (he's 11) so yeah I'm with you there.
 
  • Like
Reactions: lv-gras and millefeui
F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
I'm basically sticking around until my cat dies (he's 11) so yeah I'm with you there.
I wish I had a cat to keep me going right now. It would make life so much better :) I've never owned a more enjoyable pet, I miss mine :("
 
  • Like
Reactions: lv-gras
M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,034
I'm basically sticking around until my cat dies (he's 11) so yeah I'm with you there.
My dog is 6, so unless she gets really sick and dies, I will be staying around for a while. I don't mind it that much though, I will never be with her again after she dies, so I might as well enjoy our time together.
 
  • Like
Reactions: lv-gras
Tragoedia Vitae

Tragoedia Vitae

Experienced
Oct 14, 2018
230
Yes, I honestly think I'm going to commit suicide at some point. I have no intention of ending up in a nursing home or as a dependent on someone else's care. There are very few things worse in this world than being completely beholden to someone else for your welfare and well-being. It leaves you vulnerable to all kinds of abuse, neglect, and exploitation. I would very much rather kill myself than be pushed away in some obscure corner and left to rot and gather cobwebs.

I can't even imagine living into my thirties and forties, much less my sixties, seventies, and beyond. It's simply too awful to contemplate. Too unbearable.

But I know that people often don't realize that they are slowly but surely declining, that the end is well nigh upon them, until it's too late. And they are immediately confronted with the twilight that their life has become. And so they can do little else than await their demise, however long the wait may be.

That's what I'm afraid of—the possibility that by the time I get around to committing suicide, it may be too late. If I postpone my suicide till retirement age, I could very well come to the crushing realization that I had consumed decades of my life in disappointments and sorrows, and all for what? Follies and vanities! Then my end would be an undignified one at best.

This makes me think it would probably be better if I committed suicide sooner than later.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Maravillosa

Similar threads

bluedream
Replies
14
Views
451
Suicide Discussion
FuneralCry
FuneralCry
aipuweth
Replies
11
Views
369
Suicide Discussion
divinemistress36
divinemistress36
guineapiglover8503
Replies
17
Views
462
Suicide Discussion
Innereye
Innereye
U
Replies
4
Views
318
Recovery
Unspoken7612
U
reallysleepy
Replies
0
Views
146
Suicide Discussion
reallysleepy
reallysleepy