NSFW Stronger but in a probably not great way(not nsfw in a sexual way)

[abcz]

As I mentioned earlier, I tried to hang myself on a fence but stopped myself due to the pain. Stabbing myself has stayed in my mind(idk why it was there to start), but I also don't have the courage to actually do that because I even struggle when I want to cut myself. But then the pain from hanging felt worse than my cutting failing pain. And I'm still not confident enough to cut anywhere other than my fingers. But the scissors I use are not meant for this. And I don't know the most efficient way. So I basically just slide the blade across where I try. Which is surprisingly hard to do and can leave marks even when it doesn't cause blood(which is usually the case). So now I'm using the failure of that cause me to try to cut my fingers more when my roommate isn't in the room. Because I see cutting as a strength. I'm weak for being unable to deal with the pain. I'm weak for failing to ctb and I'm weak for struggling to cut myself.

 

[SanguineShark]

I struggle similarly with cutting sometimes. I got a scalpel from a shop, but it's still difficult to push my hand hard enough for a good cut sometimes. When it comes to hanging, are u able to explain why it was painful? I'm considering doing this method at some point, if I'm not able to do get all the stuff I need for the SN method.

 

[abcz]

I struggle similarly with cutting sometimes. I got a scalpel from a shop, but it's still difficult to push my hand hard enough for a good cut sometimes. When it comes to hanging, are u able to explain why it was painful? I'm considering doing this method at some point, if I'm not able to do get all the stuff I need for the SN method.

It basically puts all of your weight on your neck so it uses that force to strangle you if that makes sense. Something softer might be slightly better for that tbh. I'm prob not great at describing it sorry.

 

[SanguineShark]

It basically puts all of your weight on your neck so it uses that force to strangle you if that makes sense. Something softer might be slightly better for that tbh. I'm prob not great at describing it sorry.

Ahh I get it. Sad how most methods give so much pain.

 

[Sid19]

All i can say that these methods seems too painful, and I rather plan it throughly before doing anything recklessly. Have you thought about doing something less painful like sn?

 

[FuneralCry]

Trying to attempt stabbing and cutting methods just sound like they'd lead to injuries in my opinion, it really is so unnecessarily difficult to die and the human body is programmed to survive so I don't believe that one is weak if the ctb plans fail.