Discussion Started to diverge away from suicidal thoughts?

[Xebsora29]

My last attempt was in December.
I guess you could say its been 2 1/2 months since I've attempted.
I'm still feeling pretty depressed and anxious about my life, however just going through it day by day.
Sure, I feel like everyday is hell and another day of adversity added but so far, no suicidal thoughts.
Thats not to say I'm feeling better and searching for a purpose, cause I'm not.
Just doing what I'll do as of now before I eventually transition into complete insanity of living in this world. You feel?

Anyone else diverting away from suicidal thoughts?

 

[Sensei]

That's good, Xebsora29! I think the first step towards recovery is not wanting to die. I'm also diverting from suicidal thoughts, although for different reasons. It might be postponing the inevitable for me, but it buys me some time to see if my life can improve, however bad the odds.

 

[ManWithNoName]

My last attempt was in December.
I guess you could say its been 2 1/2 months since I've attempted.
I'm still feeling pretty depressed and anxious about my life, however just going through it day by day.
Sure, I feel like everyday is hell and another day of adversity added but so far, no suicidal thoughts.
Thats not to say I'm feeling better and searching for a purpose, cause I'm not.
Just doing what I'll do as of now before I eventually transition into complete insanity of living in this world. You feel?

Anyone else diverting away from suicidal thoughts?

I'm happy to hear this.

 

[SuicideBoys93]

It's quite odd, I to have stopped the thoughts of wanting to kill myself. It's not even that I'm avoiding, I just don't have them which worries me. I found out recently that my wife had multiple affairs behind my back. She doesn't want me to leave but there's no way I'll ever get past it. I'm just glad I didn't hurt anyone tbh. Like you would think I'd be in a bad place. Really just numb to everything. I've gone so low, I just go through life on autopilot. I thought for sure my impulses would start, but they haven't.

 

[ManWithNoName]

It's quite odd, I to have stopped the thoughts of wanting to kill myself. It's not even that I'm avoiding, I just don't have them which worries me. I found out recently that my wife had multiple affairs behind my back. She doesn't want me to leave but there's no way I'll ever get past it. I'm just glad I didn't hurt anyone tbh. Like you would think I'd be in a bad place. Really just numb to everything. I've gone so low, I just go through life on autopilot. I thought for sure my impulses would start, but they haven't.

Maintain your dignity and leave her. Living well is the best revenge, IMHO. Kudos to you for not getting violent, because I can only imagine the disappointnent and hurt—but in the bigger picture and long run, not getting violent was the best action to take. It will take time to get over her, but you will get over her.

 

[SuicideBoys93]

Maintain your dignity and leave her. Living well is the best revenge, IMHO. Kudos to you for not getting violent, because I can only imagine the disappointnent and hurt—but in the bigger picture and long run, not getting violent was the best action to take. It will take time to get over her, but you will get over her.

Just sucks because I had so much invested emotionally, and physically. 5+ years down the drain. I already have been struggling, and now feel like I just got a nuke dropped on me. The feeling was crazy. I had both extremes of emotions present themselves. I didn't know if I should of been mad, or cry my eyes out. This is honestly the ultimate kick me while I'm down move on her part. I don't wish this feeling on anyone. In matter of seconds the perception of the woman I loved changed forever. I don't even know how to cope with this. I'm embarrassed to say anything to anyone.

 

[ManWithNoName]

This is honestly the ultimate kick me while I'm down move on her part.

Just give it time, man.

 

[Eridanos]

I started feeling the same way!
It still feels kind of odd though. I still rationally believe that I will eventually die from suicide, I still don't have any light at the end of the tunnel, I still feel just as I felt before; but I don't feel actively suicidal as before.

I almost feel guilty about it; like that I should want to die but I don't feel it.
You described it very well.

I don't know if this is recovery or not, I just know that I am so confused right now.