so i'm feeling pretty certain about wanting to ctb. have honestly wanted to quite seriously for a little over 10 years, since i was a kiddie. but, besides the point..
there is a bridge pretty near me, like 3 hours out, that would be a pretty perfect candidate for jumping. over 300 ft high, and it's out in a very rural zone, would probably be landing on some mixture of hard sand/rocks/possibly a VERY shallow body of water (like 4ft deep.) have been lurking the other threads on the topic, and i'll be damned if that isn't a basically 100% guaranteed instant death right there with those attributes. also not a super popular spot for jumping despite these factors, so it has no rails, nets, or any other deterrents.
however, the biggest reason i've never attempted to ctb all this time despite being in a fluctuating, but ultimately constant state of wanting to, is that the fear of carrying out the action/survival instincts being extremely potent for me. so i'm wondering specifically: would getting super shitfaced drunk be an effective way to get over that hump? i literally never drink, so i could do it to myself pretty much instantly with some hard liquor or what have you. current tentative plan would be to drive out there at 3-4am with my drink, send out a couple simple messages to a couple key individuals so that people will know what's happened, chug it down and get blasted, then after letting it simmer go do a flip off the edge.
something i've thought of before is it would be a pretty good way to go if you could somehow go fully unconscious before jumping. Like maybe hanging over the side after taking some pills that will guaranteed knock you out or something. that might be a bit optimistic tho so just focusing on alcohol, what do you think? would it be a good way to get over the fear of doing it and make the experience more unconscious/peaceful on the way down if you got as drunk as possible before doing it?
there is a bridge pretty near me, like 3 hours out, that would be a pretty perfect candidate for jumping. over 300 ft high, and it's out in a very rural zone, would probably be landing on some mixture of hard sand/rocks/possibly a VERY shallow body of water (like 4ft deep.) have been lurking the other threads on the topic, and i'll be damned if that isn't a basically 100% guaranteed instant death right there with those attributes. also not a super popular spot for jumping despite these factors, so it has no rails, nets, or any other deterrents.
however, the biggest reason i've never attempted to ctb all this time despite being in a fluctuating, but ultimately constant state of wanting to, is that the fear of carrying out the action/survival instincts being extremely potent for me. so i'm wondering specifically: would getting super shitfaced drunk be an effective way to get over that hump? i literally never drink, so i could do it to myself pretty much instantly with some hard liquor or what have you. current tentative plan would be to drive out there at 3-4am with my drink, send out a couple simple messages to a couple key individuals so that people will know what's happened, chug it down and get blasted, then after letting it simmer go do a flip off the edge.
something i've thought of before is it would be a pretty good way to go if you could somehow go fully unconscious before jumping. Like maybe hanging over the side after taking some pills that will guaranteed knock you out or something. that might be a bit optimistic tho so just focusing on alcohol, what do you think? would it be a good way to get over the fear of doing it and make the experience more unconscious/peaceful on the way down if you got as drunk as possible before doing it?
