blackpaper
Member
- Nov 28, 2019
- 9
Hi everyone,
I just want to share my feelings so some of you feel a bit less alone in their pain or even maybe even understood as I have for the first time in my life by reading thru this forum.
I suppose many here also have mental illness problems like I have (depression etc...).
I feel imprisoned by life, the reality around me and periodically feel the rupturing pains of loneliness and hoplessness thinking about how long I still have wait till its over.
Everytime the pain hits hard I curse myself for continuing but I´m as of yet to weak to kill myself. Ive waited for good things to come to me all my life but thats not how life works,
I guess. Well and now even the peace of death wont come.
I dream of dying by being disintegrated by all-consuming explosion bathing everything in glowing light or by flying into the sun. Or peacefully melting with/into the earth.
How about you?
I just want to share my feelings so some of you feel a bit less alone in their pain or even maybe even understood as I have for the first time in my life by reading thru this forum.
I suppose many here also have mental illness problems like I have (depression etc...).
I feel imprisoned by life, the reality around me and periodically feel the rupturing pains of loneliness and hoplessness thinking about how long I still have wait till its over.
Everytime the pain hits hard I curse myself for continuing but I´m as of yet to weak to kill myself. Ive waited for good things to come to me all my life but thats not how life works,
I guess. Well and now even the peace of death wont come.
I dream of dying by being disintegrated by all-consuming explosion bathing everything in glowing light or by flying into the sun. Or peacefully melting with/into the earth.
How about you?