Looks like an accurate description of my own life actually..
Please read the following threads throroughly. They give a tremendous amount of information regarding SN.
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-a-comprehensive-guide-including-method.25148/
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...nd-experiences-information-google-docs.29900/
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...ntacid-beta-blockers-painkillers-draft.29822/
and if you have time:
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-megathread.1156/
You can be succesful without using anti-emetics, but will build up more fear i.e. worries in your mind that it won't succeed.
Try to get prescription for meto. Say you have migraines and they hurt more and more each time, that you feel very nauseous, have to vomit severely and are convinced an anti-emetic which crosses the blood-brain barrier will relieve you.