Sn plan failed

[batbub56]

First time posting. kind of a longtime lurker and recently officially made an account. I had a recent failed ctb plan. So I discovered sn on this site a while ago and wasn't able to find a source. People I guess do not want to reveal their sn source. I understand, no one wants to feel responsible for someone elses death. So I thought I'd try making my own sn using sodium nitrate and sodium sulfite. I was on the last step. I'm not going to go into all the different steps but ended up with what i beleved to be a solution of sn and sodium sulfate. The sodium nitrate became sn and sodium sulfite became sodium sulfate. I just had to seperate the 2 but I was so pissed off that day I decided f*** it and just chugged the solution dissolved in water. I figured i already did the hard step to make sn. As long as sn is in there it should kill me so what if its mixed with sulfate. Well it tasted so nasty and salty I threw it all up. I am so pissed and humiliated with myself I went through buying all this shit and preparation and ruined it on an impulse. Going to try something else because going through all that chemistry was so tedious and annoying I just want a simple painless effortless way to cease existing.

 

[Jadeith]

I understand it might not mean much but - i'm genuinely proud of you. To go through all this effort, to gather knowledge necessary, get ingredients and actually complete the procedure? Bravo. Really, i mean it. I understand your disappointment after ruining it on the impulse but then again, you could ruin bough SN in the same way. Even with full SN routine, fasting, antiemetics and all, there's always possibility that your body will successfully repel the poison so don't beat yourself over it.