Should I tell someone?

[nightlygem]

I want to ctb, but after examining myself and my situation I realized that it might be because I stopped taking Trazedone cold turkey. I'm not to be trusted with my own meds (despite them being harmless) so they're distributed to me by my aunt. (Yes, I unfortunately was forced to live with her)

My aunt is a therapist and she HATES trazedone, so she stopped giving them to me. Besides, it was only for sleep. I realized that the sudden onset of emotions and desire to ctb might be due to the fact that trazedone is an antidepressant, so if I stopped taking it, it would affect my mental health.

My partner yesterday yelled at me when I told them about the voices and my feelings, and told me to ask for help. I spoke to my brother, and he suggested the same. I really don't want to ask help from her, because there's a good chance she'll send me to a psych ward again. Good news is that I see a therapist in a week.

What should I do? Should I tell her, or should I tough it out? My BPD is unpredictable, so it's a 50/50 chance this goes right or wrong.

 

[Redacted24]

Is there another resource provider you can reach out to before your scheduled appointment, just to give you some outlet to discuss what's going on without going to your family? Sometimes getting a second opinion on these things can help.
I think you're very brave to consider toughing it out, that's a good sign I think.