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J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
I just have to let them know. I know my parents wanted the best for
Me. However they live a lie of "living". I know it wasn't their fault of my genetics and acne condition that ruined my quality of living and experience with other humans. However I know he's weary because I isolate myself and just work. I haven't cried that much lately but I just want them to know there is truly nothing they can do to save me. I been strong for a long time in This inhumane barbaric world. It's time
For them to let me go in peace. They have to accept what is coming. I won't tell them I'm suicidal however I will tell them I am in pain and been suffering for years. It's inhumane for them to expect me to face this barbaric world we live in. I know it isn't their fault. We cannot
Control nature/genetics and how we are born and what we look like. However it's inhumane to expect me to live in a world shaped for the rich, good looking, dominant, bullying culture. That's all I ask for them to accept my depression and the truth, that I had enough. It's time to let their daughter go, they have to accept because it's coming and I want them to prepare for the inevitable . Of
Course they don't know I'm suicidal and drained of life and energy. But the day is coming. If it's too intolerable I'll have to go in June. Although I set a date for august 2022 because I want to pay off my SL, car loan so they aren't financially burden.
 
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saltshaker

saltshaker

salt shaker, rule breaker
Jan 29, 2021
402
Yes. You should also try exhaust some options like medication and therapy before committing to suicide.
 
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J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
Yes. You should also try exhaust some options like medication and therapy before committing to suicide.
That's nice and everything however nope not an option. Also medication isn't the solution to a root issue I have no control over
 
B

BlankUser

Mage
Apr 24, 2021
501
I think you should tell them. Keeping these feelings and emotions is hard, pretending that everything is fine is hard. Whether they understand or not is up to them. Maybe you'll feel relieved? Maybe you'll get support from them?
 
N

noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
5,817
Yes. You should also try exhaust some options like medication and therapy before committing to suicide.
I would recommend that too to everyone before ctb.
 
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saltshaker

saltshaker

salt shaker, rule breaker
Jan 29, 2021
402
That's nice and everything however nope not an option. Also medication isn't the solution to a root issue I have no control over
Medication can make you more resilient, it can change your outlook, you might start enjoying things. Give it a try, and if it doesn't work you can just resume with your plans to CTB.

Heck I should try them again too.
 
W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
Yes, talking only about your depression might make them understand you better.
As for the suicide, I think it's a good decision not to talk about it because people who love you will just want you to live no matter what and tend to think a psych ward or 191912 pills are the only solutions.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,305
If only we lived in a world where suicide is accepted in the case of suffering, and when people open up they are fully understood. You should tell them if it you think it's the best thing for you, based on your situation it could take a weight off your mind. Personally I wouldn't in my case as I would be permanently watched and forced into hospitals etc as others wouldn't see my thoughts as rational
I wish you the best.
 
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J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
Yes, talking only about your depression might make them understand you better.
As for the suicide, I think it's a good decision not to talk about it because people who love you will just want you to live no matter what and tend to think a psych ward or 191912 pills are the only solutions.

That's why I'm not telling them about my suicidal thoughts
 
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W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
That's why I'm not telling them about my suicidal thoughts

That makes a lot of sense!
Last year, I failed to ctb and you can't imagine what a hell my life became. I was monitored 24/7. It took me 6 months to get my freedom back! I didn't end up in a psych ward but living with my schizophrenic mum was really hell!
 
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ExhaustedExistence

ExhaustedExistence

Life is just waiting for death
Mar 26, 2021
693
I wouldn't tell them anything about my true emotions, because it's quite easy to figure out that if you are depressed you could be also suicidal.

My family doesn't understand depression nor suicide, so if I told them how I hate this life they would put me into a psych ward forever.
 
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J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
I wouldn't tell them anything about my true emotions, because it's quite easy to figure out that if you are depressed you could be also suicidal.

My family doesn't understand depression nor suicide, so if I told them how I hate this life they would put me into a psych ward forever.
Exactly that's why I'm not saying anything
 
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Reactions: ExhaustedExistence
J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
Medication can make you more resilient, it can change your outlook, you might start enjoying things. Give it a try, and if it doesn't work you can just resume with your plans to CTB.

Heck I should try them again too.
Medication is an excuse for the pharma industry to exploit those who are traumatized a "pill" will not undo trauma
 

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