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Tulsa Sam 52

Member
May 9, 2021
24
This is a tough one if you love animals, but I need your opinions. My companion of thirty plus years was kidnapped by a nursing home (oh, yes it happens read my other blogs . . . I will update), leaving her cat in my care.

I am very much a cat (and dog) person, and have had and rescued dozens and dozens of cats and dogs over my 60+ years. Diane's cat "Twizzler" is HIGHLY SENSITIVE! With her "family," suddenly gone (Fred, Diane, Sparkle - it's a long story) she went into deep mourning and confusion.

Of course I tried to fill their place, and I gave her the kind of loving that cats especially appreciate, but even with my decades of knowing what cats like, it took me months to gain her real trust, and she has known me for her entire life.

Even though I fed her what she liked to eat, and the most gentle and loving attention, she grieved for them constantly, would stare at their empty chairs, lost most of her fur, and was reduced to skin and bones. I truly didn't see how she could continue much longer. She looked like a walking skeleton with most of her fur gone.

However with my continued loving attention I slowly gained her confidence and she has returned to better health and weight, though she still looks awful.

HERE IS MY IMPOSSIBLE TO ANSWER QUESTION: Due to Pennsylvania's third world legal system and corrupt courts, I will be homeless in a couple of weeks. At 73 I will NOT be homeless; my plans to CTB are well set and I will cross over because I have no choice. BUT, WHAT DO I DO WITH TWIZZLER the cat? I have tried to re-home her, but no one wants her. She is almost 15 so is nearing the end of her life. The local shelter might take her, but I cannot imagine anyone adopting her. AND if she went into such an anxiety spiral with someone she has known and trusted her entire life, and while still living in the same house she has lived in for the last ten years, what might it do to her to be stuck in a cage in a place she doesn't know, surrounded by strange people and animals? I think it would be a living hell for her. A final torment in her last years.

Twizzler wants to be with me all the time. She sleeps on my shoulder all night, and is stretched out beside me as I write this. She is miserable whenever she is not with me.

I have read a great deal about life after death and there is a strong consensus out pets cross over just as humans do. But what is more humane? Do I abandon her when I CTB, or is it more humane to have her put to sleep and meet her in the next world?

The hardest thing I have had to do is to have a pet put to sleep to end its suffering, but that was always at the advice of a vet. Twizzler is very old but what is more humane? To abandon her here knowing her life will almost certainly be frightening and lonely in a cage until she dies, or let her cross peacefully in the hope we will meet in the next world within a few days? What would you do?
 
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TBONTB

Warlock
May 31, 2025
763
This is a tough one if you love animals, but I need your opinions. My companion of thirty plus years was kidnapped by a nursing home (oh, yes it happens read my other blogs . . . I will update), leaving her cat in my care.

I am very much a cat (and dog) person, and have had and rescued dozens and dozens of cats and dogs over my 60+ years. Diane's cat "Twizzler" is HIGHLY SENSITIVE! With her "family," suddenly gone (Fred, Diane, Sparkle - it's a long story) she went into deep mourning and confusion.

Of course I tried to fill their place, and I gave her the kind of loving that cats especially appreciate, but even with my decades of knowing what cats like, it took me months to gain her real trust, and she has known me for her entire life.

Even though I fed her what she liked to eat, and the most gentle and loving attention, she grieved for them constantly, would stare at their empty chairs, lost most of her fur, and was reduced to skin and bones. I truly didn't see how she could continue much longer. She looked like a walking skeleton with most of her fur gone.

However with my continued loving attention I slowly gained her confidence and she has returned to better health and weight, though she still looks awful.

HERE IS MY IMPOSSIBLE TO ANSWER QUESTION: Due to Pennsylvania's third world legal system and corrupt courts, I will be homeless in a couple of weeks. At 73 I will NOT be homeless; my plans to CTB are well set and I will cross over because I have no choice. BUT, WHAT DO I DO WITH TWIZZLER the cat? I have tried to re-home her, but no one wants her. She is almost 15 so is nearing the end of her life. The local shelter might take her, but I cannot imagine anyone adopting her. AND if she went into such an anxiety spiral with someone she has known and trusted her entire life, and while still living in the same house she has lived in for the last ten years, what might it do to her to be stuck in a cage in a place she doesn't know, surrounded by strange people and animals? I think it would be a living hell for her. A final torment in her last years.

Twizzler wants to be with me all the time. She sleeps on my shoulder all night, and is stretched out beside me as I write this. She is miserable whenever she is not with me.

I have read a great deal about life after death and there is a strong consensus out pets cross over just as humans do. But what is more humane? Do I abandon her when I CTB, or is it more humane to have her put to sleep and meet her in the next world?

The hardest thing I have had to do is to have a pet put to sleep to end its suffering, but that was always at the advice of a vet. Twizzler is very old but what is more humane? To abandon her here knowing her life will almost certainly be frightening and lonely in a cage until she dies, or let her cross peacefully in the hope we will meet in the next world within a few days? What would you do?
I am very old (63) So my ideas are sort of out of sync with the world. But given her advanced age I would be comfortable putting her down. Just me, I know others would disagree...and hopefully some will! (Although then you still won't know what to do!)
 
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whywere

Illuminated
Jun 26, 2020
3,553
If it was me, I would:

1st Ask around to friends and neighbors if they would love to have a loving pet.

2nd If not, then I would take the pet to a humane shelter.

3rd If there is no 100% viable option, then I would have a vet put the pet to sleep.

I grew up on a dairy farm in the middle of now where and every once in a while, almost always a dog, would be on the gravel road. I would take them in and feed, house and love them.

For me, dumping a pet in the wild, is horrible beyond words and what I saw growing up with abandoned pets that I would take in broke my heart. Dirty, completely scared, out of their mind and so very hungry always.

Also, I am 69, and I care about you VERY much, as we are family here and I will say a prayer for you when I retire this evening.

Walter
 
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Hollowman

Empty
Dec 14, 2021
1,940
Letting her cross peacefully would be the best thing in my opinion. Sorry you're in this situation. I've had to have two pets put down recently. It's awful.
 
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falling-apart

New Member
Sep 14, 2025
4
As much as I hate saying this, I think you should find a humane way to put her down with you. You'll have to be careful, though, because some of that could arouse suspicion (depending on your history, I know if I started giving things away I'd have an immediate eye kept on me)
 
T

Tulsa Sam 52

Member
May 9, 2021
24
I am very old (63) So my ideas are sort of out of sync with the world. But given her advanced age I would be comfortable putting her down. Just me, I know others would disagree...and hopefully some will! (Although then you still won't know what to do!)
Thank you TBONTB. After the hell Pennsylvania has put me through and the agony of having to CTB, I am not sure of my own rationality. I cannot rescue my wife and best friend of thirty years from Pennsylvania's state-sanctioned human trafficking operation. One attorney said I might be able to ransom her for about $12,000, but that is just the beginning. I don't have the money to ransom her, and the corrupt courts have made sure I will be homeless at the end of the month. Do I sound crazy? It is absolutely crazy, and beyond evil, but it is completely true. The Nursing Home crime syndicate is very powerful in Pennsylvania and no one is brave enough to oppose them. STAY OUT OF PENNSYLVANIA!
As horrible as CTB is, it is safer than getting trapped in the Pennsylvania human trafficking network. And if I can't save my wife, i can remove myself and my wife's cat. My wife will end her life in captivity in a tiny room being bled for her Social Security and there is nothing I can do, but I can make sure Twizzler doesn't end her life in fear and misery.
I had expected most people to disagree with me, but everyone so far has felt it would be better for Twizzler to end her life in peace. Perhaps I still have some rationality left.
Thanks again. (Twizzler has just finished a nice late night snack and is happily curled up besides me. We will both be happier in the next world.) When the anxiety of CTB gets too much I keep telling myself "I'm finally going Home again" . I will be back with all I have loved and lost including all my fur and feather children and I won't have left Twizzler behind.
If it was me, I would:

1st Ask around to friends and neighbors if they would love to have a loving pet.

2nd If not, then I would take the pet to a humane shelter.

3rd If there is no 100% viable option, then I would have a vet put the pet to sleep.

I grew up on a dairy farm in the middle of now where and every once in a while, almost always a dog, would be on the gravel road. I would take them in and feed, house and love them.

For me, dumping a pet in the wild, is horrible beyond words and what I saw growing up with abandoned pets that I would take in broke my heart. Dirty, completely scared, out of their mind and so very hungry always.

Also, I am 69, and I care about you VERY much, as we are family here and I will say a prayer for you when I retire this evening.

Walter


Thank you very much Walter. I know so few people anymore! I suspect all the people I once knew are partying down "on the Other Side". (How did I get stuck here?) "Will the last person to leave please turn out the lights?" --- I guess that means me.
I do have one friend who is a confirmed dog lover, which is fine; I love dogs too. She said she had a friend who is a cat lover and would ask her, but so far nothing. I mentioned Twizzler to a couple of brothers of an acquaintance I once knew in Baltimore, but they showed no interest. That wasn't necessarily bad, I wouldn't want them to have her anyway, they're not the right type. Twizzler is so sensitive she needs the right kind of "family". I have had to be sooooo gentle with her to earn her trust.
The only shelter around here is the SPCA; all the other one-time shelters have defaulted to them. But you know they have so many animals coming through they won't take the time to match the pet to the owner. "Move 'em in, move 'em out." When Twizzler gets nervous she loses all of her fur, then she looks like she has mange and people don't want her. People can be so cruel to animals! I can't stand it. They can't take up for themselves.
Thank you for your very kind prayers; goodness knows we need them.
By the way my name is Walter also. There aren't a lot of us around. I am the 3rd, so we have had a continuous string of Walters since 1895. It's a good name.
 
aria_of_a_dream

aria_of_a_dream

just a dream within a dream…
Aug 16, 2025
43
Are you absolutely sure you will be homeless?

I would look for a no - kill shelter to take him, but if he is really attached to you I wouldn't do that until you know 100% you will be homeless.

Just because the cat is 15 doesn't mean it won't get adopted, some people specifically try to adopt elderly cats for varying reasons .
 
H

hell toupee

Member
Sep 9, 2024
76
Sam,

I don't think you sound crazy at all. You sound like a rational person responding to an extreme situation.

I lost my own wife and best friend of 24 years last year. I also became disabled in that time. What I went through was and still is horrible, but I can't imagine the frustration you must feel. Having your wife trapped like that. I really do feel for you. And then facing being homeless - I know the feeling. Plus the anxiety of ctb. Its enough to drive anyone crazy.

If i had a quick and easy way, I wouldn't be as stressed. I have no problem with actual ctb because I don't personally believe its the end.

Just don't let anyone tell you that you are crazy because you aren't. A lot of people would crumble facing the stuff you are.
 

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