Story Share your story in the comments on why you want to die and what method you will choose!

[Styrotoast]

I could say that the world we all currently live in isnt meant for a long term existence or go on about ptsd or other mental issues I have but I think the one thing that affects me most is loneliness. Il likely never truly have a reliable connection with anyone so il rot away in a room until I get kicked out or decide to leave myself and just end up homeless or living out of a van. My existence is worthless and will affect nothing, the few people who might care about my death will only care because they are far better people then me. The method ive chosen is to go out on one last trip, anywhere, and when I run out of resources ill find a tree and spend my last moments embraced by rope.

 

[Pillbottle64]

Reason I want to die? Well, it's simple…there is no reason to live. True, there is joy happiness and love in the world, but unfortunately there is also depression, hate, and the natural selfishness of being a living creature. I live only to make sure my mother doesn't see me die. Once she's departs though, I will follow behind and be free of my shackles.

 

[fallintotheshadows]

I suppose I can also put my reason for wanting to die. I truly believe that love is the only distraction that is good enough to overcome life's suffering. At first I thought I was unlovable due to my lack of physical affection. But now that I took something it made me have hope in it. I still feel the same way though unfortunately and am barely finding a reason to keep going so I have no clue if I will still be here until I die of natural causes. But the way i will do it is from jumping off a bridge. I still to this day wish there was ways to kill yourself that were legal so that people could do so in peace instead of so violently and horrid. This is the super short version the longer version of this story takes a lonnng time

 

[Hotsackage]

Suffering tormented for over 20 years by the worst unknown mental illnesses, and inability to provide for myself, absolutely despise that

 

[CookedRamen]

I'm sitting here and I keep writing something, erasing it, rewriting it. I should know about the messed up stuff in my life, right? Why I have such a strong desire to take the noose I carry in my backpack everywhere I go and hang myself off the nearest object, or jump from the nearest building. All of my reasons feel dull and boring in comparison to others.

• I might lose my apartment
• my car might break down and I can't afford to fix it
• My money is slowly dwindling because my new job won't give me enough hours.
• I have a life threatening eating disorder.
• I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and my mood swings are constant and extreme
• my mood depends on my ex who is my only friend in this city and she both hates me and loves me
• she tells me how her friends will hurt me and damage my car if they see me and she's holding them back
• All of my friends are just as poor and suffering as I am.
• My mother is a controlling women who won't leave me alone
• I think I'm trans but I have too much stuff going on to acknowledge something
• I've been dissociating for like 8 years now, none of this is real, I'm not real.
  

I can't stop thinking of his face, and what happened after that concert and the next morning. And I was always taught that those sorts of things don't happen to men (I'm amab). And I didn't even know what PTSD was until a couple months ago.
I don't have a college degree, but would consider myself good at programming/math, unfortunately I have no chance of ever working in either of those fields until I get a degree.

All of these might sound like a lot to some or inconsequential to others. All I know is that I am living life by default right now. I'm doing it because everyone else is doing it. I don't have any sort of reason to continue. Of course I want to escape pain and suffering of life. But more then anything I don't fully understand the point. Every person who has ever loved me has left. And that includes the people who said they wouldn't leave. They ALWAYS do.

I mentioned it above, in terms of methods; hanging, jumping. slit my wrists, gunshot to the head (I obviously am not allowed to own a gun, but there's a local range I've been to), illegal substances. I'm taking some psych meds that don't mix so well with large amounts of alcohol.

Also I want to apologize if I've used any words or terms incorrectly. I'm new here and new to a lot of the lingo/slang being used.