Scared of medication but need help to cope with dep

[Supersadmommy90]

So, long time member here, my activity level has decreased in times where I've been less depressed, now I'm very depressed again, I have postpartum depression in fact. Which I came by honestly, due to dire circumstances arising in my life unfortunately, being litigation abused by my ex, and having my family ripped away as a result by social workers and police, during pregnancy. So at a vulnerable time I'm being gang stalked by the government, and just deprived of all normal family supports that a postpartum woman would normally have. I literally have no one, 3 kids and one of them a newborn, so I need to be able to function without being in a constant state of grief, anxiety, and depression.
Anyway, I really have run out of resources to cope, and I'm barely getting by and functioning. I want to take an antidepressant but I'm scared and freaked out due to them all seemingly having horrible side effects, even long-term ones like sexual side effects that could persist after I stop taking them, I'm legit terrified of having long-term limp dick (even though I'm a woman lol) but seriously, being chemically castrated for life just because I needed to medicate depression for maybe a 6 or 12 month period. Plus I'm breastfeeding. I know I should talk to my doctor and I'm going to but I'm just freaking out at my wits end dealing with this all by myself out of necessity. Thanks.

 

[Anonymoussn]

Anyway, I really have run out of resources to cope, and I'm barely getting by and functioning.

Is this not worse than the side effects you mention? I'd say the first thing I'd be doing in your position is definitely speak to your doctor about the concerns you have. But I'd personally rather have limp dick than be constantly unhappy - but I don't know whether you've exhausted all other avenues just yet. Perhaps there are alternatives, like therapy? That's something you might want to ask your doctor - not just about therapy specifically, but as to whether in general there is anything other than the pills that you can try.

 

[Weary Soul]

Yes, antidepressants come with side effects and some that can be quite nasty - but these effects can vary from person to person, the duration of use, and the dose. But, I do agree, all medications in general come with some sort of side effect, so then, as with any disorder, one needs to weigh the benefit of taking a medication versus its risks.

You mentioned that you are a long-time user here, so there may well be new meds or new regimens out there that may offset some of the truma you are suffering.

Also, there is no hard and fast rule that you would need to take these medications forever.A short-course may be all you need to get back on track.

Postpartum depression is a serious, well-documented condition that not only affects you, but also your children and family in general. I am so sorry that you seem to feel the need need to defend why you have it - there is no need to defend this, many have suffered from it and it can be based on hormonal imbalances - which may indicate that other treatment modalities might just help (ie, some kind of hormonal treatment rather than antidepressants).

So long post short here, I totally agree with @Anonymoussn. I would definitely speak to a doctor (a good one - especially an obstatrician) or even more than one doctor in different fields to get a good idea on just what might work. Maybe research postpartum depression (join a postpartum discussion board) to learn more about this disorder, as well as look for good doctors in your area who treat this.

Much love and support to you!

 

[Celerity]

For the vast majority of people, antidepressants do not have scary side effects. The biggest ones are in your head. That said, I did not find them to be of any appreciable benefit. I hope they could help you, but I doubt they will. Even psychiatrists and psychologists, when pressed, will admit that they perform little better than placebo (sugar pills).