Venting Saw more news come out about people dying, hate how jealous I am and how lucky they are

[sickofeverything]

Saw a post about a girl being found in her dorm on brown, cause of death unknown. Also two students at Berkeley and Davis recently also died, some from suicide, others unknown or killed and it makes me so upset that others are succeeding while I'm struggling and others get to die peacefully via heart attack/stroke while I have to opt for more intense options since my heart just won't fail on me Alice in borderland had an easy drug to stop the heart, wish we had that available to us

 

[medinjured521]

I feel this, friend. I had a great life, and I was a vibrant person with a lot of passion, personality, interests and dreams, and all of that was robbed from me when I decided to take an antidepressant off label to try to get some better sleep as I was struggling with sleep. I only took it for a few days and it essentially lobotomized me, destroying my ability to feel emotions and destroying my dopamine system. Now I'm a zombie who cannot feel happiness and gets no joy from all the hobbies and passions I had in life before being harmed by medication. Every time I see a news post of someone passing away, I'm envious. My life and my future has already been robbed from me, and now I'm just a ghost who's waiting to die.

 

[sickofeverything]

I feel this, friend. I had a great life, and I was a vibrant person with a lot of passion, personality, interests and dreams, and all of that was robbed from me when I decided to take an antidepressant off label to try to get some better sleep as I was struggling with sleep. I only took it for a few days and it essentially lobotomized me, destroying my ability to feel emotions and destroying my dopamine system. Now I'm a zombie who cannot feel happiness and gets no joy from all the hobbies and passions I had in life before being harmed by medication. Every time I see a news post of someone passing away, I'm envious. My life and my future has already been robbed from me, and now I'm just a ghost who's waiting to die.

I feel the same way besides waiting to die, I can't wait anymore I need it to be now

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand as I always and only envy those who no longer suffer in this terrible, torturous existence, to me the fortunate ones are those who are at peace from the torture and cruelty of existing where there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel.

I'll just always see existence as the most cruel, dreadful mistake that just causes all this harm and suffering and all I see as positive is never suffering again, I just want to be permanently unconscious with all gone and forgotten saved from all future suffering and torture, the peace of non-existence solves everything for me.

 

[gardenhouse]

I feel this, friend. I had a great life, and I was a vibrant person with a lot of passion, personality, interests and dreams, and all of that was robbed from me when I decided to take an antidepressant off label to try to get some better sleep as I was struggling with sleep. I only took it for a few days and it essentially lobotomized me, destroying my ability to feel emotions and destroying my dopamine system. Now I'm a zombie who cannot feel happiness and gets no joy from all the hobbies and passions I had in life before being harmed by medication. Every time I see a news post of someone passing away, I'm envious. My life and my future has already been robbed from me, and now I'm just a ghost who's waiting to die.

Are you saying you can't sleep without medicine anymore?

 

[bananaolympus]

What i envy the most is ppl who died of opiod overdose like you must feel so good and chill and just die while you unconcious you don't make a mess (better vomit than ripped and crushed apart by a train or a hole in your head and blood everywhere) or somebody founds you corpse horrifically like hanging

 

[LetMeOut67]

I live near a cemetery and I walk past it and think you lucky lucky bastards

 

[chaotic_crow]

I feel you, ive had two people in my family die in the past year. I wish I could've just taken one of their places, they wanted to live and had so much going for them. I feel guilty for being a little jealous

 

[medinjured521]

Are you saying you can't sleep without medicine anymore?

I wish that was the issue. I can't feel happiness, joy or excitement anymore. All the things that made my life worth living, my passions, don't bring me happiness or joy now.