Water-Lily
Enlightened
- Dec 26, 2020
- 1,182
So, I think I've realized a flaw within myself
I realize how I choose to deal with my roomate was emotionally very immature
Its a reflection of how I always dealt with issues in my life
When life was hard, be it hard job, friend issues, etc, I'd run back home
I'd run back home because I know my family, despite how toxic they are, would enable me
They'd insist I was the victim. Insist the other person/people were the perpetrators, and enable this belief that I'm powerless
Thats what I did when turning to the head of dorms at my school
Why he insisted I should talk things out with the difficult roomate
Tbh, it still pisses me off but....yeah
I dunno
I am still waling myself off form everyone
I feel so bad I don't even want to be hugged or physically touched
It might even cause issues for a friend I've been intimate with
I dunno
I realize how I choose to deal with my roomate was emotionally very immature
Its a reflection of how I always dealt with issues in my life
When life was hard, be it hard job, friend issues, etc, I'd run back home
I'd run back home because I know my family, despite how toxic they are, would enable me
They'd insist I was the victim. Insist the other person/people were the perpetrators, and enable this belief that I'm powerless
Thats what I did when turning to the head of dorms at my school
Why he insisted I should talk things out with the difficult roomate
Tbh, it still pisses me off but....yeah
I dunno
I am still waling myself off form everyone
I feel so bad I don't even want to be hugged or physically touched
It might even cause issues for a friend I've been intimate with
I dunno