So I've struggled with things like bullying and family abuse and just you know my whole life changing after transitioning. This has also included homelessness and starvation and being kicked out of places a lot: stores, dressing rooms, bathrooms, housing, employment, etc to the point where I just dismiss myself cause I know I'm never going to be included or considered. I've been especially really triggered cause this roommate went crazy at my door one night and it sounded like he was gonna break the door down, and the landlord didn't care. Then a really old roommate kept telling me to leave the apartment with him in the middle of the night to the point where I kept saying no and he kept asking so it was just no no no no no no no and then he went up to me and took his shirt off and gave it to me and then kept asking even as I was hurrying to my room and closing the door behind me. Then when I would ignore him after that he would keep poking and touching me. The landlord said that's not harassment. Then the aggressive roommates guest went into my room one time when I was there and I assumed accidentally so I forgave it but then every time I left my room to go to the bathroom and I closed the door behind me I would go back to the door being open. It's not the kind of door that swings open either. Then yesterday I even locked my door when I left the house and got back and the door was wide open. I told the landlord this and he didn't care that they're violating my privacy for a room they do not pay for. He actually told me to leave if I didn't like it. He can't just evict me over this I don't think. I think that's illegal.
I just don't get like why people think they can treat me in ways I know they would never want for themselves. Why am I always a punching bag? Why do I never belong anywhere why can't I have anything as simple as a place to just EXIST? I'm so tired of being treated like shit all the time and people can act as badly as they want and STILL be praised and me? I just get punched down on even more if I don't WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE SHIT!
I'm so tired of it and I don't get what about me since transitioning makes it okay to treat me like this. I don't want to live like this and always be silenced. I'm just tired of trying when it never makes a difference and always treated like a freak.
I just don't get like why people think they can treat me in ways I know they would never want for themselves. Why am I always a punching bag? Why do I never belong anywhere why can't I have anything as simple as a place to just EXIST? I'm so tired of being treated like shit all the time and people can act as badly as they want and STILL be praised and me? I just get punched down on even more if I don't WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE SHIT!
I'm so tired of it and I don't get what about me since transitioning makes it okay to treat me like this. I don't want to live like this and always be silenced. I'm just tired of trying when it never makes a difference and always treated like a freak.
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