Really desperate OD on lamotragine

[Octavina]

My SN hasn't arrived yet and I'm in the hospital waiting room and the ducking rude ass nurses treat me like shit just like everyone else. I get death threats and harassment online. Everyone hates me. I am so desperate I have about 3 boxes of lamotragine 50mg each
I test out small overdoses on them often I get
Chest pain stomach ache etc
If I take all of them and try to do the blackout method in my bathtub what's the success rate of that. Yes I am bipolar the manic states get worse when I am on my menstiral cycle
EVERYOKE FUCKING HATES
ME. I WAS FINGER RAPED AS AN 8 year old and it seems like everyone in the entire world is just here to push me to suicide. I can't do this anymore, even on my social media I get anonymous harassment for drawing suicide gore. I do this to fantasise about hanging myself.
i am thinking about leaving and just going home. The hospital much nearer to me has kind as fuck paramedics and staff. When I failed my SN attempt this guy was concerned about me. Yeah he sprouted the go to chirce bullshit but at least he cared. No
One does. It's over there's a train station about 40 mins away, I know that has a higher mortality rate than od. I love you all yes, I am under 20 but I have been through hell and back, I was put on this earth to suffer, if god is real, fuck him.
I also have severe bulimia so it's pretty aparent that my heart and other organs are screwed

 

[summers]

@Octavina I'm so sorry that happened to you. I hope karma somehow gets the person who did it to you.

Orals very very rarely work. I'm going to leave it at that.

 

[PapaSuicide]

Wait for your SN! I tried lamotragine OD once and didn't work.

 

[Octavina]

@Octavina I'm so sorry that happened to you. I hope karma somehow gets the person who did it to you.

Orals very very rarely work. I'm going to leave it at that.

I have heart arrhythmia and palpitations, I also have low electrolytes due to excessive purging. I just thought my risk for cardiac arrest would be easier than the average person who doesn't abuse substances
I'm so scared. I am
Not ready SI makes me weak

 

[WornOutLife]

Won't work. Had thousands of mg of lamotrigine last year + other pills and I only ended up in a comma for 2 days and with my stomach fucked up for 2 months.

I would never do it again

 

[Octavina]

Won't work. Had thousands of mg of lamotrigine last year + other pills and I only ended up in a comma for 2 days and with my stomach fucked up for 2 months.

I would never do it again

Ok then train

 

[virginiawoolf]

hi octavina are you with us?

 

[Moonbounce]

Very helpful thread. If I'm reading correctly ODing in general seems to be a risky option.

 

[Octavina]

POLICE SWCTIONES ME
GUARDS PULLED ME OFF THE TRACKS
I can't do anything right I'm sorry I'm a failure

hi octavina are you with us?

Yes sadly

 

[Octavina]

They are holding me sectioned someone please talk to
Me I'm alone no one likes me I have no friends I'm alone
.

 

[bobjohn420911]

They are holding me sectioned someone please talk to
Me I'm alone no one likes me I have no friends I'm alone
.

hey you are going to be fine. Do not let other peoples words or actions take away your happiness or make you feel bad.

Other peoples words should not have any power of you. The only voice you should be listening to is your own. You can feel better you just need to calm down and take relaxing breaths. Breath in peace and exhale stress. It is called focused breathing and it has changed my life.

I feel you I have been in hospital before and the nurses even the doctors can try and break you. Do not let them get to you. Again I am telling you and informing anybody reading that words of other people and their actions should have no power. They are just words. Your own voice and your own thoughts are way more powerful and should be unable to be moved by another persons words.

If your problems you have are physical pain. Then I bare with you that is difficult. However you can survive.

If your problems however are not physical pain and you have mental trauma emotional problems then you are actually lucky because physical pain triumphs over mental. I know it can still be difficult and a struggle. However if you take control of yourself and your thoughts you can find happiness and get yourself in a much better situation.

Read a book. Any book. It will help clear your mind and give you better thoughts. Watch a movie or listen to music.

 

[Octavina]

@moderator
Please delete this thread so I don't get doxed I'm sorry to waste anyone's time
Police know I use the site and I might get arrested after

 

[untimelydemise]

They are holding me sectioned someone please talk to
Me I'm alone no one likes me I have no friends I'm alone
.

ive been sectioned b4 if you need some1 xx