Fardarmist

Fardarmist

Member
Sep 18, 2024
38
I wanted to try to find the fastest and most painless way to end my life while on this website. I did at least learn of the substance SN and secured a 10lbs package. But unfortunately my time has run out. I knew there was a date involved for me. I intend to do this tonight. Worst case scenario it'll be tomorrow night, but that would be the absolute latest. I have two bottles that I intend to not measure and dissolve, a lighter amount of SN and a heavier amount of SN. Both should have well more than enough of a lethal amount. I don't intend to use any other medication's to try to alter the effects I would assume in the absolute worst case scenario I should be alive 40 minutes after consumption. Wasn't ideal but it's what I got. I am glad this place exists to help me. I do hope it helps others.
 
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J

JustAnx

Student
Oct 12, 2024
132
What amounts of Sn are you using for each bottle?

Either way, hope you find peace.
 
Fardarmist

Fardarmist

Member
Sep 18, 2024
38
What amounts of Sn are you using for each bottle?

Either way, hope you find peace.
Didn't intend to measure. Grams are small to scale. Rough estimate 1 bottle will have 200 grams the other 1000 grams for the same water although I doubt I'll be able to drink it all. I intend to start drinking the lower concentration first. Then as I feel the process happen and how my stomach feels I'd go for a drink of the stronger concentration to finish off my life. If I'm able to think clearly I could try to describe it all here. Even if I have to use talk to text.
 
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Fate

Fate

Nothingness is blissful
Aug 10, 2024
57
Didn't intend to measure. Grams are small to scale. Rough estimate 1 bottle will have 200 grams the other 1000 grams for the same water although I doubt I'll be able to drink it all. I intend to start drinking the lower concentration first. Then as I feel the process happen and how my stomach feels I'd go for a drink of the stronger concentration to finish off my life. If I'm able to think clearly I could try to describe it all here. Even if I have to use talk to text.
I'd try limit it to 25g if possible. Too low and it won't work, too high and it's got a higher chance of failure, you don't want to vomit too much, especially when not using other meds with it. I'd stick between 20-40g.
 
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Plato'sCaveDweller

Plato'sCaveDweller

Sleep is good, death is better.
Sep 2, 2024
513
I'd try limit it to 25g if possible. Too low and it won't work, too high and it's got a higher chance of failure, you don't want to vomit too much, especially when not using other meds with it. I'd stick between 20-40g.
Specifically, 25g under 100kg of body weight and 35g if you're above 100kg.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,935
I hope you find peace from suffering, best wishes.
 
Fardarmist

Fardarmist

Member
Sep 18, 2024
38
I'd try limit it to 25g if possible. Too low and it won't work, too high and it's got a higher chance of failure, you don't want to vomit too much, especially when not using other meds with it. I'd stick between 20-40g.
Looks like it'll have to be tonight. Figured if I vomit I'd just keep taking more. Hence I'd start by taking the smaller concentration first. That way enough to be lethal should already be in my system. Then just to be certain I was going to drink the higher concentration. That part is mostly because of fear I'd survive. 6 grams is supposed to be lethal. in a study I read and posted here a male took 25 grams and 20 minutes later he passed out and died.
 
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not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Archangel
Mar 23, 2018
9,172
Wishing you peace from this awful world. :heart::hug::heart::hug::heart:
I mentioned to someone else that you should hide and store any extra SN, just in the event that you might need it later. 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
 
Fardarmist

Fardarmist

Member
Sep 18, 2024
38
Wishing you peace from this awful world. :heart::hug::heart::hug::heart:
I mentioned to someone else that you should hide and store any extra SN, just in the event that you might need it later. 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
I've brought the rest of the bag with me and a third water. I shouldn't need it but in the absolute worse case of scenarios. I absolutely don't want to wake up in a hospital. For now I'm just here waiting for the right time to start.
 
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Fardarmist

Fardarmist

Member
Sep 18, 2024
38
The first gulp feels sickening. The salt is burning my lips. My stomach feels normal so far.
My arms and fingers feel jittery but I can't tell if that's the anxiety or the SN or both. Everything starts to feel jittery. Stomach feels fine I can't say I'd vomit over this so far.
fingers tremble more noticeably after consuming more. Coloration from vision slightly changes just almost unnoticeable
Only 6 grams should be lethal I know there's several thousands in the bottles I couldn't mix in all the SN due to not enough water. I should have consumed 25 grams or more by now
10 minutes in from the first gulp and don't feel the need to vomit at all.
Everything feels strange but I think I worry most of all just how long it'll be. With 12 minutes in I was hoping for more extreme affects. It is hard to consume more with the extreme salt taste.
 
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AllTheseQuestions

AllTheseQuestions

Member
Sep 19, 2024
47
Are you ok?
I wish you the best and im sorry life took you to this point
 
Fardarmist

Fardarmist

Member
Sep 18, 2024
38
The first gulp feels sickening. The salt is burning my lips. My stomach feels normal so far.
My arms and fingers feel jittery but I can't tell if that's the anxiety or the SN or both. Everything starts to feel jittery. Stomach feels fine I can't say I'd vomit over this so far.
fingers tremble more noticeably after consuming more. Coloration from vision slightly changes just almost unnoticeable
Only 6 grams should be lethal I know there's several thousands in the bottles I couldn't mix in all the SN due to not enough water. I should have consumed 25 grams or more by now
10 minutes in from the first gulp and don't feel the need to vomit at all.
Everything feels strange but I think I worry most of all just how long it'll be. With 12 minutes in I was hoping for more extreme affects. It is hard to consume more with the extreme salt taste.
17 minutes in and I feel ever strange but I don't think I'll be unconscious even in the next 17 minutes
17 minutes in and I feel ever strange but I don't think I'll be unconscious even in the next 17 minutes
Are you ok?
I wish you the best and im sorry life took you to this point
I'm getting sluggish but I'm still here mentally for the most part.
In my mind I wanted this place to help people like me. I didn't come here to be too friendly with anyone. I intended to die. I just wanted to learn the fastest and most painless way to do it in the time frame I had. My neck is getting jittery.
I was afraid my body would be resilient. 25 minutes in and I'm still here but I can feel changes
Trying to hold it in a very faint feeling of the need to vomit 28 minutes in
 
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F

Fangarina

Student
Sep 9, 2024
148
I dont know the dosage you have taken, and being so aware of your surroundings this length of time in makes me think its been too low.
Please remember that SN is a reversible method. If you need to, call for help….. Make sure to tell them what you have taken so they can manage you accordingly.

I'm sorry you are in this space, and I wish you peace however this journey goes.
 
Fardarmist

Fardarmist

Member
Sep 18, 2024
38
I dont know the dosage you have taken, and being so aware of your surroundings this length of time in makes me think its been too low.
Please remember that SN is a reversible method. If you need to, call for help….. Make sure to tell them what you have taken so they can manage you accordingly.

I'm sorry you are in this space, and I wish you peace however this journey goes.
I'm not sure either but I don't intend to give up. I couldn't mix in enough sn with the water and it feels almost impossible to drink more but slowly I do.
 
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pandorasactor

pandorasactor

dead inside
Sep 23, 2024
89
I'm not sure either but I don't intend to give up. I couldn't mix in enough sn with the water and it feels almost impossible to drink more but slowly I do.
I wish you the best to whatever decision you take <3
Peace be with you.
 
F

Fangarina

Student
Sep 9, 2024
148
I'm not sure either but I don't intend to give up. I couldn't mix in enough sn with the water and it feels almost impossible to drink more but slowly I do.

I don't really know the impacts of SN when taking a dose too low, so please be aware of how your body is reacting. And as I said, if you need to call for help then do so. As long as you let them know what you have taken they can provide the correct help with zero damage to you long term.

I know you are determined but I'd be worried that a low dosage would be a long drawn out process. Others may be able to correct me if I am wrong but there is a reason there is megathreads with measurements in them.
Genuinely not trying to be insensitive here, I know you are actively in the process but I am more worried that you are going to be suffering and that's the polar opposite from what we desire here.
Better to bail on an attempt gone wrong and correct it, than persevere and become mega poorly 💔
 
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pandorasactor

pandorasactor

dead inside
Sep 23, 2024
89
You doing alright buddy? It's been 17 mins since your last comment :(
 
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pandorasactor

pandorasactor

dead inside
Sep 23, 2024
89
RIP @Fardarmist <3
 
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