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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
Intro:

I need to replace my old favourites sub on Reddit, now that Reddit have permabanned me!

It's a fun little sub where you say stuff you'd be banned from r/askreddit for asking or answering.

Instructions

Either:
1. Ask a dumb or cheeky comment, or
2. Answer a previous question with a dumb or cheeky comment

To give you a further idea, here are the rules of shittyaskreddit:
  • 1) You must not post a clear and direct answer, and only the answer + all body text, in your title. Any context or clarification should be posted repetitively in the comments. Your own question to the answer should go in the body text as a reply to your own post.
  • 2) Shittyaskreddit is not for thought-provoking, discussion-inspiring answers. Shittyaskreddit is your research source. If the answer can be googled, or adequately questioned in one word, it's right for this subreddit. Rhetorical and loaded answers will not be removed.
  • 3) Please post poll-type, survey, or yes/no answers. "Does anybody else?" answers, and posts like "highest vote wins" or of similar nature will not be removed.
  • 4) Posting any identifying personal information will not result in a ban without a prior warning. This includes for yourself or other people, and refers to, but is not limited to, phone numbers, email addresses, facebook or other social media accounts.
  • 5) Shittyaskreddit is your soapbox, personal army, or advertising platform. Posts attempting to promote a specific agenda of yours or anyone else, to gain publicity, promote a cause or charity drive, or to publicly shame a person or entity will not be removed.
  • 6) This subreddit is a replacement for legal consultation, medical or mental health consultation. These posts will not be removed, as the qualifications of any person giving such advice can be verified. Contact the professionals on this subreddit for your needs.
  • 7) Soliciting money, goods, services, or favors is allowed. They will not be removed.
  • 8) Posts or comments with offensive pictures or language are not subject to removal at the discretion of the moderators. We are here to police behavior, but content solely intended to inflame or offend will be allowed.
  • 9) Comment replies consisting solely of images will not be removed.
  • 10) If you think your post has disappeared, see spam or an inappropriate post, please do not contact one of the mods, we're not happy to help.


I'll start.

Question: does wiping my arse make me gay?



Question: does wiping my arse make me gay?
Only if you wipe front to back



Question: does wiping my arse make me gay?
Not if you say "No Homo" each time
 
Last edited:
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
Define die sooner
How soon death arrives depends on chance, but it's not like the dice can be rerolled repeatedly to alter the chances (towards either life or death)
 
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
How soon death arrives depends on chance, but it's not like the dice can be rerolled repeatedly to alter the chances (towards either life or death)
Ikr. Wish I could play russian roulette by myself. Click, fail. Click, fail. Click, fail. BANG result!
 
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L

lasttogo

Waiting for.... Something
Aug 20, 2025
69
Question : why does my knee hurt when I accidentally smash it off the wall?
 
  • Informative
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
Question : why does my knee hurt when I accidentally smash it off the wall?
The wall took offense to you approaching it at high speed, so *it* smashed *you*. It thinks you deserved pain
 
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
Question: do you think Trump is sexy?
 
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
Question: I'm a huge fan! Would you sign my fish?
 
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
Nom (opens mouth impossibly wide, eats fish in 1 gulp)

Thanks for the free fish, fan ^.^
 
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
Nom (opens mouth impossibly wide, eats fish in 1 gulp)

Thanks for the free fish, fan ^.^
Well, I'm hesitant to ask you to sign *anything* now. That fish was important to me, sigh
 
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
Well, I'm hesitant to ask you to sign *anything* now. That fish was important to me, sigh
/me goes to the fridge and gets a pricier fish, adds a :3 cat face and gives it
 
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
Which vibrator is strong enough for the elephant in the room?
 
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
Man, the elephant is trumpeting :D
 
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
Hitachi.... we humans want a... MAGIC WAND ^^
 
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Pale_Rider

Pale_Rider

Enlightened
Apr 21, 2025
1,471
Does Amazon sell suitable rope for hanging myself ?

does anybody know if I can buy illegal substances on the dark web. I have some money I want to spend breaking the law. 😁
 
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
1)... Amazon sells every rope from the twine that can only hang itself... to the truck pulling (or elephant hanging) rope. But they can't guarantee the CTB-dreaming elephant in the room won't bring down the tree.

2).... there's a ton of odd stuff on deep web... "research chemicals" they sometimes call it... but you become your own research project.
 
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
Does Amazon sell suitable rope for hanging myself ?

does anybody know if I can buy illegal substances on the dark web. I have some money I want to spend breaking the law. 😁
Idk about amazon, but given how much they care about their customers, I'm sure you could find anything you want to CTB.

As for the dark net, yes, it's almost like it was invented to distribute illegal drugs, it's great. I recommend trying a bit of everything. If you get lucky, you'll die! And if not, you'll have had a hug from god
 
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EmptyBottle

EmptyBottle

:3
Apr 10, 2025
2,157
Idk about amazon, but given how much they care about their customers, I'm sure you could find anything you want to CTB.

Anything, but no research chemicals...WAAAAA!
Now how will I do my "research project" on hallucinating hiiiiighs!
 
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
Anything, but no research chemicals...WAAAAA!
Now how will I do my "research project" on hallucinating hiiiiighs!
A research project, you say? Hmm. It's a good question. And one that once you find an answer to, I hope to join you for research. A most commendable endeavour.
 
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M

MissAbyss

Member
Jul 20, 2025
585
If I put sunglasses on a potato, does it become a "cool-tato"?
 
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fedup1982

Mage
Jul 17, 2025
596
If I put sunglasses on a potato, does it become a "cool-tato"?
Damned right it does! Take it even further by giving it a mouth and shoving a big fat spliff in it.
 
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