Questioning if I should OD again

[8272019]

I am contemplating trying to OD again. Last year, August 27th (hence my username), I attempted via overdose and only lived because I got walked in on during the OD. I'm not going to lie, it messed me up in many ways. My liver is permanently damaged, since I was already being very unhealthy by drinking and drugs. My mental state just got worse. But, I am confident that if I just do it later during the night and stay in my bed and not get up, I'll succeed in ending my life. My biggest concern is what if my parents walk in on me again? What if they hear my spasms like last time? I'm thinking about leaving the house to do it, but theres nowhere I could go. Im in a suburban neighborhood and everywhere around here are either houses or childrens parks. I could go in the gas station bathroom but if someone just so happens to walk in before I ctb, I will once again fail. I'm ready to ctb, but there are so many holes in my idea. I made this post to journal my thoughts, I apologize if things are worded weirdly or badly. I have no harmful intent in this post.

 

[gus.nixon]

Are you old enough to get a room at an inn?

 

[8272019]

Are you old enough to get a room at an inn?

Yes, but unfortunately I have no money. I've been struggling greatly financially.

 

[akrasia]

I'm sorry that life have gotten you to this point. I wouldn't suggest doing it, if you didn't plan/ research well. It would only make you in a worst state than what you're currently in. There's no need to rush if you plan to succeed.
May I ask what you would be taking?

 

[8272019]

I'm sorry that life have gotten you to this point. I wouldn't suggest doing it, if you didn't plan/ research well. It would only make you in a worst state than what you're currently in. There's no need to rush if you plan to succeed.
May I ask what you would be taking?

Fluoxetine, Lamotrigine, and Guanfacine. They're all prescribed medication I am taking. Also I am still planning, no set date yet. It would be risky and dangerous to attempt without further planning.

 

[akrasia]

I don't know much about medication and their effects. But, I know that SSRI (antidepressant) are made to not be fatal. So, you can't really OD on antidepressant, I'm not sure about the other ones though.
But, I wish you the best

 

[8272019]

I don't know much about medication and their effects. But, I know that SSRI (antidepressant) are made to not be fatal. So, you can't really OD on antidepressant, I'm not sure about the other ones though.
But, I wish you the best

Thank you, much appreciated! I have overdosed on a mix of Fluoxetine and Lamotrigine before, and it 100% would have killed me if I werent caught so soon. I was in the ICU for days. I think it was Lamotrigine, the anticonvulsant, that was the almost fatal drug. But, I still think I will take the SSRI again just because that if it almost worked before, its worth trying again. Again, thank you!

 

[umniak]

May I ask how you did it? I was prescribed lamotrigine before; I believe it is a mood stabilizer? Did you take any ant-e's? I've developed gastritis from drinking so I'm worried my stomach won't be strong enough. Still have a bottle of the holy grail but I am super benzo/gabba tolerant now.

 

[8272019]

May I ask how you did it? I was prescribed lamotrigine before; I believe it is a mood stabilizer? Did you take any ant-e's? I've developed gastritis from drinking so I'm worried my stomach won't be strong enough. Still have a bottle of the holy grail but I am super benzo/gabba tolerant now.

I look Lamictal and Prozac last time. I am not quite sure how Lamictal could work for you since it is your body, it works differently. I had no health issues before my last attempt, and now my only health issues are something with my liver being weak. Also Lamictal is a mood stabilizer and an anticonvulsant. Its used to treat Epilepsy and Bipolar.

 

[Weightoftheworld]

I'm so sorry you feel it's come to this. However, coincidentally I almost died on August 28th 2019 (unfortunately didn't).

 

[8272019]

I'm so sorry you feel it's come to this. However, coincidentally I almost died on August 28th 2019 (unfortunately didn't).

Wow, what a coincidence. I'm sorry as well, coming to that point is exhausting and painful.

 

[Tamazi 123]

Didn't you say in another post that it was horrific?

 

[Erase.myself]

I am prescribed Lamotrigine as well. I had no idea there was a possibility of it being fatal, especially if mixed with other things.

 

[8272019]

Didn't you say in another post that it was horrific?

Yes, I plan to drink a ton beforehand this time. So it numbs the psychical pain. NEVER wanna go through that again. But, considering it almost worked, there is room to change a few things.

I am prescribed Lamotrigine as well. I had no idea there was a possibility of it being fatal, especially if mixed with other things.

I was unsure if it could be fatal or not, either. Attempted not even sure if it would work or not.

 

[Weightoftheworld]

Mine was medical however. But I just couldn't get the easy way out, am I right?
I take prozac also. It can cause serotonin syndrome which can be fatal, although it's rare, so if you're determined to OD I don't see the harm in taking it also.

 

[8272019]

Mine was medical however. But I just couldn't get the easy way out, am I right?
I take prozac also. It can cause serotonin syndrome which can be fatal, although it's rare, so if you're determined to OD I don't see the harm in taking it also.

Yeah, I still take Prozac to this day. I still take Lamotrigine, but under a different label than Lamictal. Subvenite, I think is what its called?

 

[bornfree]

The issue with drugs you usually take is a tolerance can build up that might prevent success.

A couple of bits from a paper: on lamotragine that might help
In terms of pharmacokinetic properties, lamotrigine has 98% bioavailability, with peak concentrations (Cmax) reached within 1–3 hours after ingestion.

and more usefully
Paradoxically, lamotrigine which is an anticonvulsant has been associated with seizures in overdose

Seizures risk you being discovered if you are at home and others are there.

The paper is here

Safety profile of lamotrigine in overdose

Lamotrigine is an anticonvulsant as well as a mood stabilizer. Apart from its established use in the treatment of epilepsy, there has been an expansion of its use in the treatment of mental disorders. Patients with epilepsy as well as those with mental ...

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

This is about effects of overdose

Safety profile of lamotrigine in overdose

Lamotrigine is an anticonvulsant as well as a mood stabilizer. Apart from its established use in the treatment of epilepsy, there has been an expansion of its use in the treatment of mental disorders. Patients with epilepsy as well as those with mental ...

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

the mental health system is awful. They've utterly failed you. You should have access to assisted suicide but they don't care. They just care about themselves not suicidal individuals.

 

[Zozo]

I am sorry to hear you are in this predicament. I wish we could all conquer our mental illness and enjoy living life. I do not want to condone you killing yourself, but overdosing on RX meds or OTC meds seems like an uncomfortable way to go. Maybe taking like 60 Xanax, several Opiate painkillers and a bunch of Vodka might do the trick. black out, pass
out, then die in your sleep being the desired effect. However, the go-to for drug overdose is IVing about 10 packs of heroin.
Ive ODed on H twice, but was revived both times by EMS with Narcan. It was quick and painless and I would have just faded away into the ether had I not ben resesetated.

 

[bornfree]

i am sorry if i made it worse to know there's so many things that get in the way of your peace of Rest In Peace.
There's no care here.
every single day i live i know there is no care here. The monsters care about themselves not suicidal individuals
you wouldn't need to die if they cared about you. but they just care about themselves. not suicidal individuals. It's why assisted suicide could ever be a crime because it's all about what monsters want. but if monsters could care you wouldn't need to die.