Psychiatric hospital stay. did this happen to anyone else?

[jade]

the only thing the psych ward has given me is more and more reasons to go. most of the staff was awful and treated me like a dumb kid, laughed at me and belittled other patients. therapy was nonexistent, they'd give us a bunch of medication and we all walked around like zombies and slept our days away. any sign of a breakdown, they'd strap you to bed and leave you screaming there even if you got hungry or had to take a shit. some people were given access to phones and lighters etc and others weren't. i only spent a month there after a failed attempt, to keep me "safe" during the waiting list for a community.
i felt such an enormous amount of boredom that it made me physically violent. i can't possibly imagine 5 months in there. i knew a guy who spent almost a year straight, and the thought alone makes me sick.

 

[MAIO]

Oof.

One of the things I hate the most is when even the doctors/psychologists think the system is bullshit or unusable.
Scary

Suicide is a mental disorder even though psychiatrist have long had the highest suicide rates. Makes sense.

 

[TAW122]

Fortunately for me, no. I would really be urgently going through with ctb if I ever get forced into a hospital against my will. Not only is that a egregious violation of my civil rights, liberty and freedom, but also a big wound against my free will. All I know is that if I ever get sent to the hospital against my will, my life (potential career, job opportunities, civil rights, and what not) is pretty much over.

 

[TiredHorse]

I intend to ctb with N2. I'd rather not traumatize my family any further by leaving a gory corpse. That said, I have a loaded gun in an unobtrusive but easily accessible spot just in case anyone tries to get me committed. There's no way in hell I intend to let them lock me up. That was my plan before reading this thread; it's a thousand times more certain now.

 

[Lara Francis]

I just got released after spending 5 months with all the other loonies. It was ok for the most part. I kept to myself most of the time, refusing to speak or eat. There was some real nut cases, and some who were just like us, they want out. I didn't recommend this site to any of them, as you never know who you can trust.

The nurses and doctors were ok to a point. They only became irritating as fuck when they start barraging you with questions about your attempt. Can't make em happy, no matter what you say.

What happens when you refuse to eat ?

 

[ChickenAndPotatoes]

I was on a 2 months, actually more like 76 days court hold (involuntary) because I was running naked on the side of the road. I had been having psychoaffective episodes and I was terrified. Then was released from the psych ward at the VA hospital in Portland and bussed down to Long Beach, California (I'm from CA by birth and raising) didn't like Long Beach although my housing situation was ideal. Rent was only $200 and meals were free. It was Veteran/low income housing where you had housemates but my social anxiety was acting up so I left the bussed back up to Portland and went back to the VA hospital here. At this point I was homeless. They kept me for another month in the VA hospital and then put me in a group home. I was grateful they put me in the group home, otherwise I was homeless. I have poor impulse control which also includes me opening my mouth and being honest when no one even asked me anything. I most usually dont lie but I'm self incriminating. I am the guy that tells the police the whole story before I've seen a lawyer. Poor impulse control and ignorance. I told the manager at the group Veterans home in Long Beach that I wanted to move out because I wanted to hang myself somewhere private. She texted another woman to call 911. So 911 shows up and starts doing their checks on me in her office. I ended up going to a psych ward in Long Beach. Involuntary. Besides having psychoaffective episodes (which is hell on it's own), that place was hell. It stunk because there were a few who wouldn't or couldn't wash. The place itself smelled weird (although it was more likely due to PAD). The staff were the worst part. They were nasty with attitudes. Cussing and yelling at people. Talking shit about people behind their backs. Talking all loud during sleeping hours. Playing music on their phones loudly. Kept spelling my name wrong. I didn't even see a psych for like a week of being there. That place was just gross. There were two people who talked nonstop. And this one staff member always put what HE wanted to watch on the tv which was that stupid rapping show 'Wild N Out' where Black people make a fool of themselves. I hate that show. Plus that staff member had an attitude.

 

[Empty Smile]

What happens when you refuse to eat ?

I didn't eat for the first 2 weeks I was there. They threatened to hook me up to iv if I didn't, so I gradually started eating.

P.S. in my post I put 5 months. That is wrong, it should have said 2 months.

 

[naia_]

Never again, the only thing that kept me going is knowing that it could still be worse, I could still be at auschwitz. I have been blessed as they only kept me a month and a half there for suicidal thoughts, just enough so I didn't get addicted at the high dosage of 3risperidone they were force feeding me. I have gotten fooled by society who preech that suicidal citizens should seek mental help, fuck, they don't know what they are talking about,there is none to be found in a psych ward. Here in quebec, They only want to keep you there as long as they can, to milk as much money from the governement. They also want to make you addicted to these pills so that you have to remain your whole life on them. Those pills are fucking dangerous, they will give you akathesia, drastically slow your brain to the level of a retarded being and most of all restlessness. The inability to sleep, to be happy, to be at peace. They'll even steal your thoughts and your dreams, one of the only place where one can still feel at peace. By then, you long for death, the only thing that can put an end to this widewake nightmare. That can give you back the dignity they have stolen from you.

I am so sorry you must have experienced this. Only someone who has been in this can know these things. You made me cry. Only one disagreeing comment I have.

I'd prefer Auschwitz.

 

[Strumgewehr]

How was your experience in psychiatric hospitals, if you had one? But most importantly how long have you been kept there?
I'm asking this because I have read some threads on the topic and altough the experience is almost never enjoyable for people I keep reading that usually the doctors let you go after some weeks, a month, a month and a half at maximum.
Well I'm almost a month out of that hellish place and guess how much I've been kept there? Almost five fucking months. I still can't believe I'm finally "free". That was a goddamn prison sentence w/o having committed any crime.
And for what? A failed attempt? I'm not psychotic, violent, I'm not dangerous for other people. What's the problem if I want to ctb? I'm 19, I can think clearly, I know what's best for me.
Last time it was 2 and a half months, the one before 1 (forced ospitalization because my doctor thought I was hurting myself with IV drug use, when actually it was a time in my life I was almost keeping my shit together, I was so much more functioning than now and I was doing very well at school). The time before that 1 month, forced hospitalisation again. The reason? I refused to see a psychiatrist and try the billionth shitty antidepressant that did absolutely nothing. The first time just 10 days of hospitalization (I was still underage) so I guess I can't complain about that...
And the things I saw in those places... I can just say they fucking make me lose faith in humanity.
I had to tell the doctors how the medications that they were prescribing me worked under the pharmacological profile because they didn't know shit, I got addicted to benzos 'till the point i could barely crawl out of bed without them, but God forbid that I use opioids to self-medicate 'cause those are drugs that destroy lives... fucking hypocrites.
I've seen people sleep 20+ hr a day because they were on mastodontic dosages of anti-psychotics + benzos; a guy came in looking relatively normal (just depression and a cocaine problem), in a few days he couldn't even fucking articulate a sentence because of how much overmedicated he was. Once an old man was choking on some water because of AP-induced tardive dyskinesia; I've seen people getting tied up to the bed for days on end without any valid reason, others were getting extremely dangerous medication cocktails and put at risk of serious conditions like seizures and serotonin-syndrome; one night a man (really a beautiful person btw, when an ex-cop decides to illegally give you the oxycodone he had at home without asking for any money to give you a few days of relief from the unbereable psychological pain you're in... what can you say?) was screaming and crying because of back pain and the answer of the doctor and nurses was "We already upped the dosage of his painkillers, he'll be ok, mind your own business". You stupid whore, he's sick and you're a doctor, do your fucking job!
And I could go on forever but I'll stop here. It sounds like a joke but this is a real-life horror story. I can't believe how people can be so stupid and insensitive.
The only positive thing about those places IME is that you can find folks who understand you because they know how you feel, you are not judged or made feel guilty. I've made a lot of friends in there and some of them i kept seeing even after i got out.

Anyway sorry for the rant, I just needed to take this off my chest. I hope my english is decent and everything is understandable.

TL;DR: have you ever been to a mental hospital? For how long? Were you forced or it was a free decision? Is there somenthing of your permanence (both positive or negative) that you want to share?

Damn! Scary. There's something about doctors I can't fully trust them.

 

[Letmego. Please]

Experience wise, both very good & very bad, from what i can tell over the years the biggest difference in care is IF the staff give a monkeys.
How long have i been kept there, 2yrs back in the early to mid 90's shortest is i guess 2-3mths.

I popped my nut house cherry when i was 20 & got forced to go in for booze detox for 2wks & the buggers then decided there was a reason i drank so much (D'oh) so made me stay for 3mths.

I will say one thing positive, well maybe i'll ramble a few, but i have had the pleasure of meeting some of the best most caring people in my life, made some brilliant friendships & for all the hell that those places contain, i have had some of the best laughs in life while locked up, for some reason it brings out the rebel in me and a healthy dose of the 'Coldiz spirit' where i will escape regardless of your puny attempts to restrain me....

Has anyone else had the ultimate chemical cosh - That being the electric version ECT?