Venting Process of Suicide Note Only Angers Me

[BougainvilleaBlooms]

I've written a couple of notes as to why I'm ending it but these people (my family) are so willingly ignorant and stupid. I've already written letters before to express my feelings to my mother and she does nothing with that.
She and the family has done a lot of emotional damage and suppression. I can't even write some of it without hurling, but I'll try:

• Talking behind my 12yr self's back with a worker about how grown I'm trying to be as I was trying on some bras I liked at Victoria's Secret because they were cute and I didn't know it was sexual shop
• Creep neighbor peeps in at my window and doesn't call the police
• Conveniently never noticed the abuse (physical/emotional/verbal/no SA) my older half-sister inflicted on me and sometimes mimics it.
• Dismissing any problem I had, then getting mad as to why I never told her anything
• Mom has a failing memory that she refuses to believe is true (un)intentionally gaslighting me
• Doesn't consider how I feel about her boyfriend (I barely knew and only knew through a lie that he was my uncle) moving in and that trust her because she never let's any man in the house (stupid dumbass)
• She is a fucking child who has no sense of actual parental responsibility
• Abuse apologist when it comes to family and victim blames while denying she does that.

List can go but maybe you get the gist, I have no familiar or friends to turn to without getting a load of bull or would understand me. I've given my mom enough letters and tried to work within my limits (anger and grief towards her) with using ai as a therapist (it has helped me a ton) to help her see the errors but it's gone nowhere because she thought she could just sacrifice her time and energy by working overtime and that the emotional stuff was an option (it seems).

So I'm now thinking just to leave the words "It's Futile. Because all I'll get in return is Denial, Blamed, Downplayed, Silenced and Ignored as always"

And if she were to see this I know it'll be one of those rinse and repeat of her crying saying she had no idea and it's not like that anymore because it's over (makes no sense) and she would've done better. Bs. BS TO ALL THAT FORGIVE & FORGET TRIPE YOU AND CUNT OF A HALF-"SISTER" DO (who btw works in childcare and justice system ironically. Burn in Hell with your dad's killer, you two-faced hypocritical bitch. I pray for the wellbeing of the children that had the misfortune of being with her)