I have an appointment with a psychiatrist tomorrow. Apparently this psychiatrist is not a fan of borderline personality patients, which I happen to be. I'm scared that they're going to push me to make a rash decision to CTB by invalidating me. I want that decision to be well planned, not impulsive, I don't want to fuck it up. I have to be secretive enough that I don't get locked up for suicide plans. Here goes nothing ..
Lol. I had requested this appointment to seek further diagnosis (I think I'm bipolar), and assess for medication that might help better than what I'm on now. But the wait was over 8 months, so now I've just decided there's nothing anyone can do to help me, and wish I didn't have this appointment.
I don't know what your situation is regarding insurance, ability to pay, and choice of providers but... if at all possible don't settle for a provider that you're not comfortable opening up to, or that you think is going to push you into a place where you feel like hurting yourself, if your goal is to heal. I recently moved and had to find a new psychiatrist and therapist, and I have been through 3 psychiatrists and 4 therapists in the past year, before I finally found ones that I feel like are a good fit for me.
Unfortunately psychiatrists are hard to come by where I live unless you're hospitalized. I'm stuck between being unwell enough to need a psychiatrist and hiding it well enough that I don't need hospitalization, so I'm flying under the radar. At least I have a therapist I like.
I totally understand. I moved from a fairly populous and prosperous area to flyover country and I am lucky to have had the opportunities I have with shrinks here. The one I'm with now I'm seeing via telehealth... he's actually located a couple of hours away. Glad you have a therapist you like. Hope things work out for you. Be sure to research any meds you get prescribed before you start taking them. I say this as someone whose life has been ruined by a decade of overprescribing by various psychiatrists. It's much easier to start most of these meds than to stop taking them if they don't work out.
I see, you can always cancel it but they'll probably charge you for it. I think I might have bpd as well, I've given up hope on the 'professionals'.
It's nice be able to use technology to find supports, it helps a lot of people who live in remote or underserved areas. Thank you for the advice, but I'm sorry that it's coming from a place of experience. I'm on 2 right now, and titrating/ weaning is absolutely horrendous. I had actually got off both for about 6 months and that failed miserably. I have experienced intense suicidal thoughts when starting and stopping meds so it complicates things unfortunately.
Yeah, finding the right person, the right med, the right treatment, and aligning all of that perfectly seems to be a rare occurrence for most.
It's pretty much pointless to research meds, big pharma can't be trusted and people react differently. I don't think they know what they're doing at all, the human brain's too complex.
